+88______________________________ in loveing Memory of matt Waters
_+880_____________________________ 4ever strong #13
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______________69______________H.I.M 4EVA

My Poems

[items]


(\ /)
( . .)
c(''') (''')

80% of Americans say "I LOVE YOU".
20% actually mean it.
If you honestly are in the 20%, paste this into your
profile
__________*/.)_______
_________*/•|________
________*/• \________
_______*(•_ )________
_______ .|¯|_________
_______ .|•|_________
_______ .|•|_________ music
_______ .|•|_________ is
_______ .|•|_________ my
_____,__.|•|_________ LIFE!!
____/#|_.|•|__/\_____
___(##(_,|•|,_)))____
___\###/ |•|/&&/_____
____\##)&___&&(______
_____)#/&&___&&\_____
____/#|&&&___.&\\____
___(##\__&&&_'._)|___
____\ ######## //____
_____"+,_____,+"_____

 

 

 

this is Mr.Shroom touch him and u shall die (add this as a secerity gard aginst all emo haters out there)

50 things to do at Walmart
1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.
2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.
4. Start playing Calvin ball; see how many people you can get to join in.
5. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners.
6. Challenge other customers to deuls with tubes of gift wrap.
8. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.
9. When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW, especially down thin narrow aisles.
11. Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all off and turn the volume up to 10!
13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven't seen you in so long!..." etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrasment.
18. Play soccer with a group of friends, using the entire store as your playing field.
20. Put M&M's on layaway.
21. Move "Caution: Wet FLoor" signs to carpeted areas. 22. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows form bed and bath.
25. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying , "...I'm Batman. Come, Robin- -to the Batcave!" 26. TP as much of the store as possible.
29. When some one asks you if you need help, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"
30. When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, "Red Rover!"
31. Make up nonsense products and ask newly hire employees if there are any in stock, i.e., "Do you have any Shnerples here?"
32. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with G.I. Joe vs. the X-Men.
33. Take bets on the battle described above.
35. While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as possible.
36. Hold indoor shopping cart races.
40. Say things like, "Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies?"
46. When some one steps away from their cart to look at something, quickly make off with it wiithout saying a word.
47. Relax in the pation furniture until you get kicked out.
48. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream,"No,no! It's those voices again!"
49. Pay off layaways fifty cents at a time.
50. Drag a lounge chair over to the magazines and relax. If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
20 Ways To Annoy A Public Bathroom Stallmate

1. Stick your open palm under the stall wall and ask your neighbor, 'May I borrow a highlighter?'
2. Say, 'Uh oh, I knew I shouldn't have put my lips on that.'
3. Cheer and clap loudly every time somebody breaks the silence with a bodily function noise.
4. Say, 'Damn, this water's cold.'
5. Drop a marble and say, 'Oh shit! My glass eye!'
6. Say, 'Hmmm, I've never seen that color before.'
7. Grunt and strain real loud for 30 seconds and then drop a cantelope into the toilet bowl from a height of 6 feet. Sigh relaxingly.
8. Say, 'Now how did that get there?'
9. Say, 'Humus. Reminds me of humus.'
10. Fill up a large flask with Mountain Dew. Squirt it erratically under the stall walls of your neighbors while yelling, 'Whoa! Easy boy!'
11. Say, 'Interesting.. more floaters than sinkers.'
12. Using a small squeeze tube, spread peanut butter on a wad of toilet paper and drop the wad under the stall wall of your neighbor. Then say, 'Whoops, could you kick that back over here please?'
13. Say, 'C'mon Mr. Happy! Don't fall asleep on me.'
14. Fill a balloon with creamed corn. Rush into the stall with your hand over your mouth and let out a lengthy vomit impression while you squeeze the balloon and splatter cream corn all about. Apologize profusely and blame it on the fettucine alfredo you had for breakfast.
15. Say, 'Boy, that sure looks like a maggot.
16. Say, 'Damn, I knew that drain hole was a little too small. Now what am I gonna do?'
17. Play a well known drum cadence over and over again on your butt cheeks.
18. Before you unroll toilet paper, conspicuously lay down your 'Cross-Dressers Anonymous' newsletter on the floor visible to the adjacent stall.
19. Lower a small mirror underneath the stall wall, adjust it so you can see your neighbor and say, 'Peek-a-boo!'
20. Drop a D-cup bra on the floor under the stall wall and sing 'Born Free'.
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32 ways to make a girl smile.

1. Dont hug her friends or your friends that are girls cause she'll feel left out.

2. Hold her hand at any moment . . . even if its just for a second.[she notices]

3. Hug her from behind. [she loves it]

4. Leave her voice messages to wake up to. [personal fav]

5. Wrestle with her [i love this one!!!]

6. Don't go hang out with your ex when shes not with you, you might not realize how badly it hurts her. [but some girls can handle it. . .]

7.If you're talking to another girl, when you're done talking, walk over and hug her and kiss her.... let her know she's yours and they aren't.

8. Write her notes or call her just to say "hi". [girls are not hard to please]

9. Introduce her to your friends . . . as your girlfriend.

10. Play with her hair.

11. Pick her up (she loves it)=]]

12. Get upset if another guy touches her and she doesn't like it.

13. Make her laugh.

14. Let her fall asleep in your arms.[she will too and if she does she is trusting you]

15. If she's mad at you, kiss her.

16. If you care about her, then TELL HER!

17. Every guy should give their girl 3 things: a stuffed animal(she'll hug it every time she goes to sleep), one of his sweatshirt/hoodies (she'll wear it everyday), and a pair of sweatpants (she'll most likely wear it to bed). [not a fan of the sweat pants part lol]

18.Treat her the same around your friends as you do when you're alone.

19. Look her in the eyes and smile.

20. Hang out with her on weekends.

21. Kiss her in the rain (girls love this).

22. Kiss her just for the heck of it.

23. If your listening to music, let her listen too.

24. Remember her birthday and get her something, even if its simple and
inexpensive, it came from YOU. it means all the world to HER. it's the thought that counts.

25. When she gives you a present on your birthday, Christmas, or just whenever, take it and tell her you love it, even if you don't (it'll make her happy).

26.Always call her when you say you will, it may not seem like it, but it does hurt her and makes her think you don't care so call even if you can only talk for a minute. Girls don't necessarily have to have hour-long conversations every night but its nice for them to hear your voice even for a quick hello.

27. Give her what she wants.

28. Recognize the small things . . . they usually mean the most.

29. tell her shes beautiful, she needs to know her striving is working.

30. Hang out with her whenever you are free and u should be free to hang
with your girl friend all the time.

31. remember her favorite flower and get her one on occasion.

32. If u care about her...SHOW her!
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The 13 Juggalo Commandments:

1. Thou shalt always holla a "whoop whoop" to let thy neighbor know you're around

2. Thou shalt not take the Dark Carnivals name in vain,else shall have ye head sliteth

3. Always stay true to thy Family as they shall be true to you

4. Thou shalt not base ye life or looks on mainstream perceptions

5. Thou shalt always keep ye shyt wicked and wild

6. If called a "Freak, Crazy, Psycho, or Deranged, etc." thou shalt raise both middle fingers and say thanks

7. Thou shalt keep ye hatchet sharp and ready for haters

8. If thou be a true Juggalo/lette, Thou shall always represent with pride

9. Thou shalt not pass judgement on another, lest it is passed on you first

10. Thou shalt always keep a blunt rolled and a beer ready for thy Homies

11. Remember if thou art faketh, we shall braketh thy *bunny* in half

12. We are not against the world, the world is against us. So remember to keep them middle fingers ready

13. Be wut we wanna be,act how we wanna act,see wut we wanna see.
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50 Funny Random Questions

1) If love is blind, then why is there lingerie?

2) Why are they called "apartments" if they are all connected?

3) Should you believe a chronic liar if he admits that he is a chronic liar?

4) Did Adam and Eve have bellybuttons?

5) Why is it that dogs love to hang their head out of the car window, but will get mad at you if you blow in their face?

6) If all the world is a stage, where is the audience?

7) If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is there to hear it, does it still make a sound?

8) If pro is the opposite of con, then wouldn't congress be the opposite of progress?

9) If the Pentagon were run by women, would missiles be shaped differently?

10) How do you plan a surprise birthday party for a psychic?

11) If your seat can become a floatation device, why can't the airplane become a boat?

12) Isn't a "free gift" redundant?

13) If a Smurf is choking what color does he turn?

14) Many builders refuse to have a 13th floor. Why aren't book publishers afraid to have a Chapter 11?

15) Why do we park on driveways and drive on parkways?

16) Why is a completed building still called a "building" since it's already built?

17) Why sterilize the equipment used to administer a lethal injection?

18) How can there be self-help groups?

19) What was the best thing before they invented sliced bread?

20) Why is that sheep don't shrink when it rains?

21) If a 24 hour convenience store is open 24 hours per day, 365 days per year, why are there locks on the doors?

22) Why does the term "wind up" mean both start and end?

23) If the word for more than one goose is geese, then why aren't groups of moose called meese?

24) Did you know that Evian spelled backwards is naïve?

25) If olive oil comes from smashed olives, how do they make baby oil?

26) If it is true that practice makes perfect, and also true that nobody is perfect, why bother practicing?

27) Are vegetarians allowed to eat animal crackers?

28) How do you know if sour cream has expired?

29) Why are there no Preparations A-G?

30) Do caskets come with a lifetime warranty?

31) Why are they called marbles if they are made from glass?

32) Ever notice that people who talk to God are saying prayers, but those that God talks to are crazy?

33) Why do people insist on stating things that "go without saying"?

34) Does the military have any misguided missiles?

35) Are all shifts at the cemetery considered graveyard shifts?

36) Do modern day witches run spell check before they cast their spells?

37) Do mermaids wear algebras?

38) How can there be civil war?

39) Do astronauts with sweaty feet get "missile toe"?

40) If people have nightmares, what do horses call their scary dreams?

41) Do you get to keep the time you save?

42) If time heals all wounds, then explain belly buttons.

43) Why do bars have parking lots if it is illegal to drink and drive?

44) How do they treat people who become addicted to therapy?

45) Why do they call it "rush hour" when the traffic is so slow?

46) If it is illegal to shoot them, why do they call it "tourist season"?

47) Why aren't moustaches called "mouthbrows"?

48) Why does the sun make our hair light and our skin dark?

49) Why does minute rice have to cook for 15 minutes?

50) Why aren't wiseguy and wiseman the same thing?


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HATE EMOS?

READ THIS:

Isnt it funny that when you go to the shops with your friends you look down at the girl with black jeans and studs but smile at the girl wearing a a mini with a t-shirt that barely cover anything?

Isnt it funny you can change your music taste to impress a guy but when it comes to a girl who likes her own music and her own style, you give her a mouthful?

Isnt it funny that a guy can get away with being a gangsta but the emo gets a mouthful from everyone

are you laughing?

Isnt it funny an emo can be quiet all through the week but gets more *bunny* from everyone than the girl who sleeps around and sells her virginity?

Isnt it funny that you dont mind your friends drinking, smoking but the minute someone mentions emo music you can give them a lecture on melodramatic teenage outcasts?

im not laughing

Its so funny that you and your friends can make a guys life hell and not know anything about the silent battle he might be fighting.

Isnt it funny that you can call emos, punks, goths the retards but still manage to get through your day without an inch of guilt in your heart.

HOW YOU CAN CALL A guy A POSER, HOW CAN YOU SAY "YOUR NOT EMO" OR "ATTENTION SEEKER" WITHOUT SPENDING A SECOND TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHY THERE ARE CUTS ON HIS WRISTS AND WHY SHE SPENDS HIS LUNCHTIMES CRYING INSTEAD OR LAUGHING WITH HIS FRIENDS

keep on laughing

Isnt it funny you can say and do all this without any idea of what is going on in this persons life

without knowing her situation with her friends

or her family

or her LIFE

BRAVE ISNT GOING UP ON STAGE AND STRIPPING

BRAVE IS NOT SAYING A SPEECH

OR DUMPING YOUR BOYFRIEND

BRAVE IS

GOING TO SCHOOL ON MUFTI DAY AND NOT FOR A SECOND CARE WHAT THE *bunny* HEADS AROUND YOU ARE SAYING ABOUT YOUR CLOTHES

ITS LISTENING TO YOUR OWN MUSIC AND BEING PROUD OF IT

ITS GOING THROUGH EVERY DAY WITH THE THINGS PEOPLE SAY TO YOUR FACE AND BEHIND YOUR BACK AND YOU STILL KEEP QUIET

ITS KNOWING WHAT YOUR "FRIENDS" ARE SAYING ABOUT YOU AND STILL CALLING THEM YOUR FRIENDS

BRAVE IS KNOWING THAT TOMORROW ISNT A BRIGHT AND HAPPY FUTURE

ITS ANOTHER DAY OF *bunny* AND DODGING RUMORS

keep on laughing
if you agree put this on ur blog
and advise others to do so
screw THE EMO HATERS.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~







lets see, I saw hundreds of naked students run around in the rain at night on campus.

Also in math class

Teacher: so blah blah, traslations, blah blah, precal stuff, blah.
Students: *half dead from early morning and bordom*
Teacher: hey class what's 2+2?
Students: *wakes up* FOUR!!! *feels proud*
Me: WTF. *laughs*
Originally Posted by Dementia View Post

A scene from a lower-grade biology class:
Teacher: "So, how is a cow useful to a human?"
Student: "Uh..."
T: "..."
S: "..."
T: "Alright. Where do people get milk from?"
S: "They make it from powder!"
T: "... And what is the powder made of?"
S: " ... Plastic? "
The class
me:wtf lol
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the gayest come back u can ever say 2 sum1--ur face
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awsome lyrics by my fav bands:


WASTELAND by 10 years

Change my attempt good intentions

Crouched over
You were not there
Living in fear
Signs were not really that scarce
Obvious tears
I will not hide you through this
I want you to help
Please see
The bleeding heart perched on my shirt
Die, withdraw
Hide in cold swear
Quivering lips
Ignore remorse
Naming a kid, living wasteland
This time you've tried
All that you can turning you red

Change my attempt good intentions
Should i, could i
Here we are with your obsession
Should i, could i

Crowned hopeless
The article read living wasteland
This time you've tried
All that you can turning you red
but i will not
Hide you through this
I want you to help

Chorus

Heave the silver hollow sliver
Piercing through another vctim
Turn and tremble be judgemental
Ignorant to all the symbols
Blind the face with beauty paste
Eventually you'll one day know

Change my attempt good intentions
Limbs tied, skin tight
Self inflicted his perdition
Should i, could i
Change my attempt good intentions
Should i, could i
Should i, could I

-------------------------------------------

Damn Regret by THE RED JUMPSUIT APPARATUS

Damn regret, I'll try to forget
Don't worry about me
'Cos I'm real fine
Cast my line
To see what's behind
Did you think you persuaded me to let you go?

You're the only one I turn to
When I feel like no-one's there
And when I'm lonely in my darkest hour
You give me the power
To sit and pretend

Damn regret, I'll try to forget
Don't worry about me
'Cos I'm real fine
Cast my line
To see what's behind
Did you think you persuaded me to let you go?

Did you think I forget?
Did you think I surrender myself to persuade you to let me go?
Did you think I forget?
Did you think I surrender myself to persuade you to let me go?
---------------------------------------------------------------------------

THE HELL SONG BY SUM41

Everybodys got their problems
Everybody says the same things to you
Its just a matter how you solve them
And knowing how to change the things youve been through

I fear Ive come to realize
How fast life can be compromised
Stand back to see whats going on
I cant believe this happened to you, this happened to you

Its just a problem that were faced with
Am I not the only one that hates to standby
Complications headed first in this line
With all these pictures running through my mind

Knowing endless consequences
I feel so useless in this
Cant patch that back and as for me, I cant believe

[chorus:]
Part of me, wont agree
Cause I dont know if its for sure
Sunnenly, suddenly
I dont feel so insecure
Anymore

Everybodys got their problems
Everybody says the same things to you
Its just a matter how you solve them
What else are we supposed to do

[chorus x2]

(why do things that matter the most
Never end up cutting close
Now that I find out, it aint so bad
I dont think I knew what I had) [x2]
--------------------------------------------------

DEEP INSIDE OF YOU BY THIRD EYE BLIND

When we met light was shed
Thoughts free flow you said youve got something
Deep inside of you
A wind chime voice sound sway of your hips round rings true
Echos deep inside of you
These secret garden beams changed my life so it seems
Fall breeze blows outside I dont bring stride
My thoughts are warm and they go deep inside of you
Oh yeah
And I never felt alone
Alright alone alone
Till I met you
Friends say Ive changed
I dont listen cause I live to be
Deep inside of you
Slide of her dress shouts in darkness
Im so alive im
Deep inside of you
You said boy make girl feel good
But still deep inside still
Ive never felt alone
Till I met you
Im alright on my own
Till I met you
And Id know what to do if I just knew whats coming
I would change myself if I could
Id walk with my own people if I could find them
And I would say that Im sorry to you
Im sorry to you but I dont want to call you
But then I want to call you cause I dont want to crush you
But I feel like crushing you and its true
I took for granted you were with me
I breath by your looks and you look right through me
But we were broken and didnt know it
But we were broken and didnt know it
But we were broken and didnt know it
But we were broken and didnt know it
Right oh whats right
Somethings gone you withdraw and Im not strong like before I was
Deep inside of you
I can go nowhere I burn candles and stare at a ghost
Deep inside of you
And some great need in me starts to bled
Ive lost my self theres nothing left its all gone
Deep inside of you
Deep inside of you
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

JUMPER BY THIRD EYE BLIND

I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
You could cut ties with all the lies that youve been living in
And if you do not want to see me again I would understand
I would understand
The angry boy a bit too insane
Icing over a secret pain
You know you dont belong
Youre the first to fight
Youre way too loud
Youre the flash of light on a burial shroud
I know somethings wrong
Well everyone I know has got a reason
To say put the past away
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
You could cut ties with all the lies that youve been living in
And if you do not want to see me again I would understand
I would understand
Well hes on the table and hes gone to code
And I do not think anyone knows
What theyre doing here
And your friends have left you
Youve been dismissed
I never thought it would come to this
And i, I want you to know
Everyones got to face down the demons
Maybe today
You could put the past away
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
You could cut ties with all the lies that youve been living in
And if you do not want to see me again I would understand
I would understand
I would understand
I would understand
I would understand
I would understand
Understand
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
Can you put the past away
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
I would understand
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
I would understand
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
And I would understand
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
I would understand
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
I would understand
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never let you go: third eye blind

There's every good reason for letting you go
She's sneaky and smoked out
And it's starting to show
I never let you go
I never let you go
I never let you go
I never let you turn around, your back on each other
That's a good idea, break a promise to your mother
Turn around, your back on each other
You say that I changed
Well maybe I did
But even if I changed
What's wrong with it?
I never let you go
I never let you go
I never let you go
I never let you turn around, your back on each other
That's a good idea, break a promise to your mother
Turn around, your back on each other
And now our friends are gone, are gone
And all the time moves on and on
And all I know is it's wrong, it's wrong
And all I know is it's wrong, it's wrong
If there's a reason, it's lost on me
Maybe we'll be friends, I guess we'll see
I never let you go
I never let you go
I never let you go
I never let you turn around, your back on each other
That's a good idea, break a promise to your mother
Turn around, let's turn on each other
Good idea, break a promise to your mother
Turn around, your back on each other
That's a good idea, break a promise to your mother
Turn around, your back on each other
What a good idea
I remember the stupid things
The mood rings, the bracelets and the beads
Nickels and dimes, yours and mine
Did you cash in all your dreams
You don't dream for me no, you don't dream for me no
But I still feel you pulsing like sonar from the days in the waves
That girl is like a sunburn I would like to save
That girl is like a sunburn I would like to save
She's like a sunburn, she's like a sunburn
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chocolate salted balls: by south park

Two tablespoon's of cinnamon,
And two or three egg whites.
A half a stick of butter?. Melted?
Stick it all in a bowl baby.
Stir it with a wooden spoon.
Mix in a cup of flour,
You'll be in heaven soon.

Say everybody have you seen my balls
They're big and salty and brown.
If you ever need a quick pick me up
Just stick my balls in your mouth.

Oooo suck on my chocolate salted balls
Stick em in your mouth, and suck em!
Suck on my chocolate salted balls,
They're packed full of vitamins, and good for you.
So suck on my balls.

Quarter cup of unsweeten chocolate,
And a half a cup of brandy.
You throw in a bag or two of sugar
And just a pinch of vanilla.
Grease up the cookie sheet.
Cause I hate when my balls stick.
Then preheat the oven to three fifty
And give that spoon a lick?

Say everybody have you seen my balls
They're big and salty and brown.
If you ever need a quick pick me up
Just stick my balls in your mouth.

Suck on my chocolate salted balls.
Put em in your mouth, and suck em!
Suck on my chocolate salted balls,
There packed full of goodness, high on fiber.
Suck on my balls.

[Sniff, sniff, sniff]
Hey, wait a minute.
What's that smell.
Smell like something burning.
Well that don't confront me none.
Long as I get my rent paid on Friday.
Baby you better get back in the kitchen.
Cause I got a sneak'n suspicion.
Oh man baby, baby!
You just burned my balls!
Help me, my balls on fire
????? baby
My balls are burning
Give me some water!
Pour some water on me!
My balls are burning
Oh my goodness,
I'm blow'n
I'm blow'n
Do somethin

Oooo Suck on my chocolate salted balls.
Put em in your mouth, and suck em!
They'r on fire baby!
Suck on my chocolate salted balls,
Put em out baby, blow
Ohh
Suck on my balls baby
Suck on my balls baby
Suck on my, red hot, salted, chocolate balls
Come on baby
Woo, woo
Suck on my balls.
[Blow blow]