top that

By Autophobia on July 4^th 2009, terribly early in the morning.
on topic The most random things

bark bark brak









myname is charles the jsdflksajbgvjbsajlkdfbklasf

























mewoooooooooooooo immmaaa emo































mmmmmmmmmmm butter bitch




















nipplenippler






























quack imma window







































ask.com or ass.com? hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm






















no just ur mom.com orrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

































ur t.com




















































hahahahahahahahaha jajajaja imma jedi
a kedi goes clockkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk























suckeld on my honeydue xD


























tv= black nail polish
























and ur mom= back pimple




































plus ur shemalemom= uthera























cockadoodle dooo imma ur crouch

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Random thoughts watching Eurosport

By hojadaro on July 4^th 2009, mid-morning.
on topic The most random things

Write? For three minutes I don't know what to say. I'm sitting here watching the tour de France live from Monaco. The helicopter is flying over the mill pond blue marina. The commentator saying about the yachts... yachts?! They're a bit different to the mirror dingy I used to sail as a kid. There's one that looks more like an ocean liner. It has a swimming pool aboard which would probably fit my dingy in sailing around as the kids have toys in the bath. What a lifestyle that must be to have to be able to own a boat like that? I wonder what jobs they do, how do people become so rich. I wonder about this sometimes well a lot of the time as bills drop through the letter box in various shades of red, with differing levels of threat. You should pay, could pay, must pay. Well I can't. Instead I dream of owning a big yacht and sailing away to escape it all.

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Random thoughts ...

By hojadaro on July 4^th 2009, mid-morning.
on topic The most random things

Unicorns and pepper pots, witches and snails. Bedtime stories too soon turn into an early morning wake up call. Toothpaste smeared on mirrors with towels dropped in the bath. Stepping in puddles, splashing with wellies. Green toed froggy ones. Bouncing on the carpet shouting Ribbit, is that like rabbit? Rabbits eating carrots to help them see in the dark, why does a rabbit need to see in the dark haven't they got a torch. Is it a torch or a headlight? No it's a miners helmet, Whats he mining for? He's not mining he's pot holing. Stupid thing to do, a light shining at the end of the tunnel or is it a train coming toward you. Climbing to the sun breaking out through a man hole. Now in the middle of the road with cars whizzing around. Is this what the rabbit felt like is that why he now ventures out at night instead and hence he needs the carrot.

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At 1am without words

By MasterMorality on July 5^th 2009, early evening.
on topic The most random things

I eat a face for breakfast,
I eat a face at night,
then on Sundays, faces place
In front of me
A merry sight.

I did a cartwheel backflip,
And spiraled into hell.
Without a sip of asprin
I sold my soul to the devil
And the operator told me who to phone
Should I ever get sick and die

You see I was wondering, you know?
About things like asprin,
Catsick,
Hate
The millenium eye
And a whole whale in a tin can made of juicy fruit.

But never you mind.
Because one day it'll all be over
And you can relax. And think "Holy fuck, it's really true!
And this all taking far too long,
You see I'm running out of steam,
But i keep going, and the pings of random emoticons,
Machines that make no light
Do penance for their insignificance.

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The Night I Thought My Family Had Been Turned Into Aliens...

By morphis78 on July 6^th 2009, evening time.
on topic The most random things

one time I thought that my sister and mother had become aliens because of a recent visit to my grandmother's house. I somehow just assumed that because it had been a bad visit that she had somehow turned my family into aliens. I was convinced of this because they didn't speak to me at all the entire time on the way back home. So I sat quietly in the back of the car waiting to see if they were going to take me to their headquarters. I imagined it would be formal and that it would be a terrible hell. I thought so this is what my life is going to turn out to be. I was susprised, however, when we actually made it home, and I actually made it safely into the house without them attacking me in any sort of way that might be perceived as alien behaviour. Later that night I admitted to them that I had thought they had become aliens, they never said one way or the other which sometimes still makes me wonder if this is all just a cover up, and eventually they will kill me or worse turn me in as a slave for the alien community...

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Taco Nun's life story

By Ninja-spoon on July 7^th 2009, mid-morning.
on topic The most random things

Once upon a time there was a taco nun. She lived in a potato sack. I like hamburgers. Anyways the taco nun was in love with a porn star. His name was Dick Van Douche Dyke. He was green with a uni brow and he keeps soup in his pants. Well nuns aren't supposed to have sex or any of that, so she pretended she was a Buddhist and shaved her head. Ya I know it's disgusting she was a hairy taco. Fireworks are just ducky, aren't they? ANYWAYS the now shaved taco nun was dressed in leather and she yelled out I ONCE TOUCHED A COW'S BEEF at the porn star and a bunch of random people started coming out of buildings and falling from the skies and I dont even know where else and they all started singing "Everybody was dancing in the moonlight!" and pulled their pants down and a chicken died that day and had a funeral.
The end.
P.S: The taco got kicked out of the nun place for shaving.

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My random.

By Shibboleth on July 7^th 2009, lunch time.
on topic The most random things

This is the blacklist
that I wrote for my mother
I laughed as I looked at it
crude as it was
The few people on it
were neither friends nor enemies
They just dwelled
in the land of nothingness.
I laughed again...
they will not suspect me...
I laughed in their faces
and I erased every word.

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ummm random.... hi

By Dark-Spell on July 8^th 2009, the wee hours.
on topic The most random things

ok here's something that's kind of random ummm.... OMFG THE EMOS POTATOES HAVE COME TO TAKE ME BACK TO THE MOTHERSHIP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! please dont call the aliens... TT~TT
Mommy! I miss you!!!!
holy jesus on a crabcake- omg wait!!!!! I want a crabcake!!!! James took my crabcake you bastard!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Rawr~ That's I love you in dinosaur!
If we're going to hell I'm riding shotgun damnit!
Zomg i love poptarts and milk but some son of a bitch FINISHED THE DAMN MILK!!!! I had the poptart all ready it was all warm and toasty but then I went in the fridge and THERE WAS NO MILK LEFT. It was a tragedy. I cried. I sobbed. I punched the wall. And I hit my brother because I just KNEW he drank it! oh wait... now tht i think about it...i did have some milk before bed... um... sowee andrew....
I HAVE ADD!!!!!!!!!!!! wait no. Look at that... LOOK AT IT DAMNIT!!!! That looks awesome! ^^
The voices tell me things.... evil things...
HEY YOU! Me? YEAH YOU! God? NO YOU DUMBASS! OH WAIT... YEAH. I'M GOD. Cool... Hey can you stop a war? NO. Why the hell not? BECAUSE I FKING SAID SO NOW LEAVE ME ALONE. But people are dying... A lot. SO? PEOPLE DIE. Man, whatever. You're useless. DIE!!!! *a bolt of lightning comes down and smites the random person who has not been named*
Le Poof~
DON'T FK WITH ME WHILE I'M HAVING DREAM SEX WITH ZERO KIRYUU, GOT IT???????????????
Rawr~ That's DIE!!!!!!!! in dinosuar ^^

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Watev

By Tony6926 on July 8^th 2009, late evening.
on topic The most random things

dog eating beavers
cheese on a house
monkeys in ma shoe
holy crap a pigeon
man womans
ummmmmmmmm
idk......fan
oak tree in a hen patch
lost a bus, call rental services
dude wheres ma leg
im white, wat do u mean im white,...holy crap im white!!
bogoglles
udsibuboses
cinder spheres
technicality
chair hoppin
check book
brown curtains

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yup.

By white stone on July 10^th 2009, mid-afternoon.
on topic The most random things

In the taco stands of east L.A I have made my living, flipping out the grease upon the world to clog arteries and cause the belts to break. What are these tacos made of? I put my heart into them everyday. Will you praise my culinary skills? Will life always play these cruel jokes as if unions were cut under my nose? No one appreciates the taco anymore... I have grown sad and heavy in my heart. It stings ike salsa glowing in the moonlight. It is dried cilantro on the windowsill weeping for her children. Oh, fair taqueria in the sky! What would you have me do? Ahhh... speak to me....

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By CourtJester on July 11^st 2009, the wee hours.
on topic The most random things

Random huh? Okay, I think I can do this. I dunno, my roommie never sits quiet, always waits until I am in the middle of something before they interrupt me. Dammit shut the fuck up already, I would never say that or maybe I would who knows. So anyway I was looking at this woman today, and as she came towards me I smiled as usual. I turned around to look behind me when I saw these two huge beach ball sized lumps hanging off of the back of her wiggling and wobbling every which way. I was like geez thank god she didn't turn around beside me I could have totally gotten knocked down or even out! Then I wondered what would happen if I just ran up behind her and kicked one. Hmmm probably not the smartest move, but it would just be hilarious. Then I thought oh shit what if someone could hear my thoughts, then they would think I am a total retard. Then I thought to tell them to fuck off or something, cuz then I wouldn't have to say it because they would already know, ya know? Anyway my time is up thank god I didn't write what I was really thinking down ......

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random fucking nonsense

By BeautifullyBroken. on July 11^st 2009, early evening.
on topic The most random things

Soooooooo...HELLO! Meh name is KAITIE and I am like ...OMG A PIG. like for real. LIKE SWINE FLUUUUUU! Omg what if I got swine flu.
That would be FUNNY because then I would be all SICK AND SUCH!
omg.
SOOOO yea Imma make this pretty fucking random...ZOMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
what ??????????
omg stop looking at me!
stop!
no!
dont do it steven!
no!
sighhh
well so today is my BDAY actually it's not until november 7th and it is only JULY ELEVENTH TODAY
but guess what TODAY IS FREE SLURPEE DAY!!! AT 7/11! GO GET ME ONE!
i will be your bff!!
forever!
i just got a new fish! his name is sparkles. he is a red betta fish.
he is the best
except he doesn't like being touched. i stuck my finger in the bowl and he started having a spaz attack
omgggggggggggg.
ehh.
i got nothing
but we all have something
not me
yes you
OMG!!!!!
WOW I AM SOOOO FUCKING HYPER
ITS NOT EVEN FUNNY
entertain me, sparkles!!! YAY he did a trick!
no, he didn't. imma liar.
sorry.
ooooooooooooo k im done now.


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Drunken Dove

By Rexidatious on July 17^th 2009, the wee hours.
on topic The most random things

As I watch the rock and roll birds
fly their way drunkenly singing a dirge,
I wonder what has happened to this life of mine
and where all this water came from, is it thine?

Well this just won't do,
this water is blocking my view.
Of all the things aghast
Laying on the floor like a dead mast
from a ship so grand
it could swim its way to the faerie land.

To meet the wee folk
Just to crack like a yolk
from an egg, giant!
The thing that lay it was my ant.

Now we find ourselfs where we began,
back with the drunk doves and songs of death.
What a strange tale I have spun; it's quite a laugh,
Just consider what you have read my dear friend megan.




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By metanoia on July 18^th 2009, the wee hours.
on topic The most random things

boy, your words are like paper,
they look beautiful on the page
but I bet you
when it rains, the lines will fade
and they'll mean nothing

and my friend you used to know would tell me
what happened at night
well you'd laugh and you'd cry
just as easily as I
but when the morning came
their bed was empty

your body wasn't there
the pillow was bare
you were gone

and these things, you say
are so complicated
but I'll be damned if they're not
just words to keep us away
from the subject

Well if your body is a hand print,
my voice is a sword;
your lies-- my comfort
they stain, they burn


Im sure you won't agree
that all the other girls you see
are shaking in their sheets
wishing you were there
to comfort their needs

and these things, you say
are so complicated
but I'll be damned if they're not
just words to keep us away
from the subject

Your body is a hand print
my voice is a sword
your lies are my comfort
they stain, they burn

Well maybe I'll be your Poseidon
I'll sink when you don't want me to
but I'll keep
your note with
me

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George crashes a party

By Trivial Pursuit on July 18^th 2009, mid-morning.
on topic The most random things

The chimpanzee jumped over the fence and ran across the field for some ice cream in a tree. The heat was sweltering and his slippers were much too big to stay on for long as he darted across the highway, headed for what looked like sanctuary. Little did he know that This was not his African turf but instead an average American backyard.
The furry little ape crossed out in front of cars with is arms swinging wildly in the air in a frantic celebration of freedom. The Chimp screeched and flashed his teeth to every car that slowed down to read his t-shirt. He leaped up onto the back of a large Tropicana orange juice truck and at full run he leaped again for the trees off to the side of the highway. Once there he made his way deeper into the overgrowth of bushes and branches and other things of nature's making.
The ice cream was close by and he could smell it wafting in his nostrils, teasing his senses. Very suddenly and abruptly he stumbled out of the bushes and right into the middle of a child's birthday party. He was greeted with terrified screams and shrieks of horror and dismay. Ah! the ice cream, at last it was in his sights and soon, his belly. He walked coolly over to the ice cream with his hands on his hips; his body entire body shifting left to right with each step, like a runway model. All the shocked party-goers looked on in awe as the ape pulled out a chair from the table, pulled himself up into it, grabbed a plate and sloppily served himself a large portion of chocolate ice cream.
He paused momentarily as a small blond Pomeranian yipped at him greedily. He reached down with chocolate ice cream covered hands, scooped up the Pomeranian, gently put it down next to him on the table and quickly resumed eating. The Pomeranian quickly joined him in the feeding frenzy.
The sound of a glass door sliding open slowly caught the apes attention and he paused again, this time to see a little tanned girl in a pink, fluffy dress waltzing over to him calmly. Remembering his charming manners, he stepped down from his chair and pulled out the chair next to him for the girl to take a seat. The little girl climbed up to the seat, grabbed a plate and served herself some cake. "Thank you mister monkey" she said as a big smile broke out across her face. He turned to her and replied, "No problem, happy birthday!"

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OmgI'mSuchAnIdiot.Xx

By Graciee on July 24^th 2009, terribly early in the morning.
on topic The most random things

Okaay. Some of the stranges- wait, no stupidest things we have done:
-I was watching a sad movie in a cinema and stood up and shouted "NO!" at the screen when a guy killed himself!
-Pushed a door that said PULL.
-I emailed a relative on their birthday, the email said "merry christmas!"
-i forgot my name
-i forgot how to spell "happy" i spelt it "hapie" XD

~Yeaah, I'm pretty stupiddd. :S but the muffin man is more retarded than me!

my friend lydia is a bit retarded too! she eats spaghetti for breakfast and can burp the alphabet!

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random

By SaraIsLonely on August 4^th 2009, evening time.
on topic The most random things

I wish that I was a blue taco.
That would be sexy. And everyone
would want me because I'm blue.
I sometimes wonder how it feels to be
a fish because thats hott. I wish the world
was ice cream. Oh my gosh I see words on the computer screen. XD ha ha lol

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Just a few things to think about

By McFlurryAngel on August 5^th 2009, early morning.
on topic The most random things

I like cheese. I have seen multicoloured cows named Steve.
If two gooses are geese, then why aren't two moose meese, or when two foots are feet, why aren't two footballs feetball?
Milk tastes good.
OMG cheesecake is the best dessert ever!
Did you know that spoons can speak?
The clocks are melting.
The water is turning purple.
Rocks me socks.
I have a pet llama < seriously I do!
Melvin, Dililah, Germentrude, Rodger
I want a garbage truck for my birthday what do you want for your 25th?

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LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

By Zexion-83 on August 23^rd 2009, evening time.
on topic The most random things

Pizza is covered in slimey, iky gooy chewy tastey yummy nasty delicious
CCCCCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!
CAKE IS GGGGGGGGGOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODDD!!!!!
LOLLOLLOLLOLLOLLOLLOLLOLHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHEEHEEHEE
..................................................................................................................................
I promise I didn't moon anyone today D8.................................................
............................................................................................................
............................................................................................
.......................................................................(silent cricket noises)
.........................................................
.......................................
.................
.....
MMMMEEEEMMMMOOOORRRRYYYYSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(cough)

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