By Angel-of-Chaos on June 6^th 2009, the wee hours.
on topic Emotion Numbing Pills

I have taken so many pills I have come to terms with the fact that I just can't be helped. It makes me sad to know that the world finds me so horrible to deal with they want to give me any meds that might change who I am. Was it a bad thing that I could feel, and express how I felt?
I hate this medicine I am on now, it steals my creativity and I can't think straight. I am affraid of what might happen if I stop though. There is nobody in this world that can help me deal with my emotions instead of stifling them. Maybe my emotions stem from an unfinished grieving process. Shit happened, and I had no time to grieve or share my feelings. There was noone there to help me through the things that harmed me in everyway possible.

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By HayleyMai on June 6^th 2009, mid-morning.
on topic Emotion Numbing Pills

,

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By nwolkrellik on June 6^th 2009, late at night.
on topic Emotion Numbing Pills

I live as though i have nothing to say

die without worry having to pray

my state of mind will make any blind


but where you moved you cant find

nothing but remorse
to learn

now i leave so you can breathe

still hiding whats beneathe

you can see when you look in my eyes

but do not judge my un wasted trys





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what is it?

By triumphantone on June 6^th 2009, late at night.
on topic Emotion Numbing Pills

Popping pills, a daily chore.
morning i awake with stillness in life,
and night i sleep with silence wide awake.
the days go by so plainly
emotional statues stuck in place
unable to move. Feeling as if it never existed.


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Depression

By CrysEliz on June 8^th 2009, early evening.
on topic Emotion Numbing Pills


Fierce emptiness thrashes inside of me,

How can one feel so empty?

Timeless thoughts of ones forbidden past,

Exactly how long will these thoughts last?

Dieing thoughts pry emotions out of me,

But I know it's the future I cannot see.


Feeling anger for no apparent reason,

I really thought it was just the season,

So here's to question and let it be,

Is it depression or is it just me?


Then I got pills in my tummy,

Use just to give me the real me,

I feel so good and so happy,

Taking them are better than feeling crappy








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My Savior?

By AB Dagley on June 8^th 2009, late at night.
on topic Emotion Numbing Pills

Anxiety. My 'disease." My pills. A tisket a tasket another pill filled basket. Lexipro. 10mg a night. A life saver. Callie. My misery, and my overall controller. She refuses to remain at her tree, yet does not want to be here. Lexipro gives her peace. I can feel something other than sadness and misery. I can see a light in the dark. Yet my poetry, it fades with the cure. But it had begun to run in circles. But to watch it slip through my fingers. Grasping at words that refuse to for coherent thoughts. But I'm happy. Or happier than without. But at what cost? So many questions. No answers.

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My Stupid Pills

By Kia-Ruko on June 11^st 2009, lunch time.
on topic Emotion Numbing Pills

I hate these pills- how they make me feel...
They taste so gross, they change what's real.
I don't get it, they're to calm me down,
the sad thing is, it isn't me that is around.
It made me mad, my hate; it grows.
I lose my friends, and my anger goes.
It doesn't just change my mind, it changes me.
It makes me different, can't you see?
After school, instead of seeing my friend,
I'll get a ride home and just lay in bed.
If I fall asleep, my dreams will not come,
and if I wake up, I am no fun...
I hate these pills, aIl won't take them anymore. Either way, I'm miserable, destroyed at the core.
Another thing about my pill, if I don't take them,
I'll hate myself and everything I do within.
If I do take my pills, I'll hate my friends!
Either way, I'm screwed cause I'll fail on both ends.

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Blue

By in the snow on June 12^th 2009, late at night.
on topic Emotion Numbing Pills

Manic depressive
this side of obsessive
i cry and i
cry
cry
cry
I fly and i
still
want
to
die

little blue pill
Oh little blue pill
make me sleep
make me keep
a level look
sanity on the hook
my emotions in a book
eyes half open
heart smashed shut
but
no tears
look
no joy
but no pain!
You call this sane?

I can be
empathetic pathetic tragic magic mercurial methodical robotic neurotic exotic ecstatic romantic temperate happy sad mad glad ruined fixed broken again
in a second
or
i can be a
...........
Im sorry
what?

Little blue pill
Oh! Little blue pill!
how
you
still
kill

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Freedom

By Sevasti on June 23^rd 2009, lunch time.
on topic Emotion Numbing Pills

Everyday, every hour and minute surrounded by the need , the want, and desire...I am the one who lays helplesslessly on those days that I am not with my easter eggs, speckled with spots... of ...the pain... anxiety and tension take over...this is me...trapped like a bird that has its wings clipped. But, I will not give them up..they are my quality of life, without them I feel so much pain throughout my body...I am no longer the person I was. I am better for these tiny pieces of happiness..I would feel scared all the time..trapped in my house and my psyche. I will not feel guilty for my forbidden pleasures. I am free to do what I want without being the person i once was...trapped in a bottle, surrounded by my thoughts that are not my own...I can now fly !!

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i have it all

By Gypsy-Girl on June 25^th 2009, early evening.
on topic Emotion Numbing Pills

i pop on every morning to make my depression fade away

if only it were that easy

but the meds barely work

im depressed right now and thinking of cutting i need more

i must be bipolar and bit a of ocd and add and schitsophrenic and ptsd as well as anxiety

so I guess the lost of meds would me

lithium and xanax

ritalin and prosac

as well as what u need for the others

the side effets must i explain my pain? nasuea, stomach acid, behavioral and violent, yawning, drowsiness, dry eyes, itching skin, breaking out, paling, loss of creativity ( which is everything that's truly me ) , loss or gain of appetite, gain of weight, all these things i truly hate and thats not evenv the end of it

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