She stands before the mirror
and stares at her reflection.
Her gently rounded abdomen
is bared for her inspection.
The weight she’s gained a testament
to drugs and consoling cuisine.
Too round she thinks, for an empty womb.
Somehow it seems obscene.
Bruises mark the spots
when Lupron was injected.
Drugs for infertility
it’s not what she expected.
Estrogen patches indicate
her current cycle’s quest.
Raw red marks, where yesterdays
Treatment squares were pressed.
A survivor’s scar reveals
That she was fertile in the past;
and she wonders if her first child
will also be her last.
Could a scar hold the answer
…to the loss of her fertility?
She sighs and steps into the tub
to bath in illusive; tranquility.
Author notes
This is about a woman who posts to one of the bb's I post on. Here is an excerpt from one of her posts.
I was just about to get in the shower and I noticed how my stomach tells the story of my struggle with IF.
Its round - too round - weight gain thanks to meds (and eating wrong foods).
Bruises dot the area marking the lupron injection sites.
Square estrogen patches indicate my current FET cycle. Red square marks indicate where I removed the patches the day before (OUCH!).
Finally, a scar from a C-section illustrates that I was successful once - and indicates the mystery of why I cant do it again!
Brenda
I dedicate it to her. Patti
Written January 10th, 2005
In a list
A contest entry
- Dedications - To someone you never met by FrozenEnigma.
400 points, ended January 26, 2005, 7 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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I'm glad that you enjoyed this poem, and very sorry for your friend. This struggle is difficult enough without knowing that you might have chosen to end your only chance.
I don't usually empathize well with those who are suffering from secondary infertility (already have child) because I envy them too much. But, the women who inspired this poem described her feelings very well, without making me feel like I wanted to slap her. A few women on one of the boards started a thread once about how infertility was worse for them, because they already had a child/ren and that, that somehow made it doubly cruel. Here I’ve been struggling for years to have even a single child only to have someone argue that if I finally have that child and then can’t have a second or third one I’ll be worse off? I’m just not that selfish. At least I hope not. Thank you so much for reading and commenting
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Well done
Woweee, this is an awesome tribute and one I can readily relate to. I have a friend who aborted her first pregnancy and then ended up marrying the father anyway. No matter how much she tried and how many procedures she went through, she never fell pregnant again. Its a very sad poem, but exceptionally well written and I applaud you for writing this one. Thanks also for your wonderful comment on my poem "Flowers Wild and Free" Mjuch love, warm hugs, sunny smiles and lotsa blessings. Marilyn -
This is a beautiful poem, though it's sad. Yes, I remember the injection bruises on my abdomen and gaining much too much weight. I got really depressed after our last time with IUI, and I weigh more now than I've ever weighed in my life! I hope you were able to share this poem with your friend!
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This is an awesome poem!
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You capture a womans struggle vividly. I know of my own struggles, so in ways I could relate to this. Good luck with everything.
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I will see what I can do about your suggestions. I have a job interview tomorrow morning and a doctor’s appointment tomorrow afternoon. If everything looks good at the doctors I plan to start my first cycle with injections and I’m not sure how that will effect my creativity. All those hormones can make strange things happen. So how soon I get any changes made depends upon a lot of factors. But rest assured I won’t disregard your advice. Thank you for your kind comments. Patti
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Beautifully Written
Well i can say this is one of the most original, i absolutly Love the articulation and the way you were able to use the excerpt to write this.The gift of life is exactly that, a gift, mysterious and difficult and you did a wonderful job bringing that womans story to life and inspiring us with your kind words of a womans struggle.I being a guy who will never know the trials and pain of child birth, was givin a small taste of waht it might be like.Thanks so Much for this blessing. -
I can say that this poem is the most original, or one of the top there original, subjects in this contest. The turnout is defintately NOT what I expected. I thank you so much for entering and for doing something new and interesting. For a suggestion, it sounds very prose-like, just broken into lines. Do you think you could try to enhance the poetic quality by either expanding on descriptions or just more fluid words? Work on it. I like!
:-)
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