Tonight I sit in the solitude of my dark room,
And a memory comes back to me.
A memory I had suppressed all these years
So many emotions rush in with this memory,
Most prevalent of these being anger
I was only 6 years old
And you were 12
You were one of my idols
My favorite cousin
I looked up to you
I devoured every word you said
I wanted to be just like you
So when you said you wanted to play "doctor"
I willingly followed you into that bedroom
When you said lay on the bed,
I carried out your instruction
And waited for more
I asked how we played this new game
"Just close your eyes" you said.
And then you took my innocence
You did things to me that no 6 year old should experience.
When I asked why you were doing them,
You told me it was how we play this game.
I told you I wanted to tell mommy,
I wanted to share with her the new game I had learned.
But you made me promise not to tell;
It was our little secret
A secret that I tucked away inside me
I suppressed this memory until now.
As I sit in my darkened room
Tears roll down my face
Tears of anger, tears of hate, tears of sadness.
You got away with what you did
I bet you've even forgotten about it.
But I am forever changed
I was too young
Too trusting
And you took advantage of it.
Yes, it's all coming back to me now
Author notes
this is the first time ive said anything about this...
Written December 21st, 2004
What did you think
Comments
-
POWERFUL
I am in tears honey, I am so sorry this had to happen to you. Tell me who did this to you and he will pay. I promise you, nobody hurts my baby sis and gets away with it. You put your hurt and anger in such a powerful write. I am proud of you, please call me when ever you need to talk. -
wow...i went through the same thing except the person who did that was a kid my mom babysat, not relation to me,and I was about 4 or 5 when it happened. I told my parents right after it happened, but i don't remember wat happened to the kid...and i'm scared to bring it up to my parents. Oh well...it was in the past and i was just a little kid not knowing that playing doctor was something bad. I hope you can also not blame yourself, and know things will be okay. Great write!
*Mary* -
wow powerful write. You know you can still get him done right? There is no time limit! Also I think you should talk to your mum about it-or at least show her this poem!
Sarah ~X~X~
Adding your comment:
2 old applause
