I gave you my all,
Wrapped up nicely with a ribbon,
"Be careful." said I,
"It's delicate, don't drop it,"
Holding your hand close to my chest,
"Please take care of it,"
"It breaks easily."
Author notes
The Best Christmas Present I Could Think To Give!
xXx
Written December 19th, 2004
What did you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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glorious!
This is absolutely delightful. Insightful, cute, and just all around sweet. Excellent job, mum.
Much Love,
Libs-a-ree -
Thanks, i put in the quotation marks in because am a bit of perfectionist wit spelling grammar etc (at least in my work lol
and the last two lines are separatle because i wanted them to be two different sentences, with a pause in the middle, rather than a continuated line! thanks for the comment
xXx
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i like this nice and simple.
Vikki
xx -
And without a doubt, the best present the intended reader will recieve! I woul dliketo see it without the quotation marks, but that's just me. I think you could still distinguish with punctuation like so:
I gave you my all,
Wrapped up nicely with a ribbon.
Be careful, said I,
It's delicate, don't drop it.
Holding your hand close to my chest,
Please take care of it,
It breaks easily.
I just find the "s distracting in such a short piece, if you do want to leave them the last lines don't need to be enclose seperately, just like this.
"Please take care of it,
It breaks easily."
A lovely sentiment, and indeed the best gift.
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This was very sweet. It is the best thing you could ever give. But the most dangerous gift of all. Keep up the good work!
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Aww this is very sweet, nicely done, I love this.. its just so simple, short and sweet, right to the point, this is just beautiful.. this is perfect, a perfect gift for christmas! Great write!
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I agree with Pegasus.. it's so very sweet.. and so very well written..
beautifulwork Frankie!!
Nour- -
awwwwww
awwwwwwwww thats so very sweeeet!!!!!!
it is the best christmas present ever!!!!
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