~by Gregg Rowe~
'Twas Christmas Eve and all through my home
Everyone had arrived, especially to get stoned
The guys were well-hung, the gals were not there
For in my advertisement I had stated 'This is a gay-affair!'
We were just settling down on the king-size bed
While visions of erections danced in our heads
I in my birthday suit, giving a blow job
Slurping and licking an eight-inch knob
All of a sudden there was a loud crash
I jumped off the bed and landed on my ass
Out of the room in madness I dashed
'Who's the idiot of my party that was now crashed!'
I flung open the door and looked into the night
Lo and behold a beautiful sight
What had opened my eyes in bright delight
A hunk of a man, in ballet tights
I invited him in, by the scruff of his buns
Patted his basket and asked if he wanted some fun
He smiled and he laughed, he grinned from ear to ear
'I guess, really, that's why I am here!'
'Now Mary, now Jane, now Billy and Sam
Let me get undressed so all of you I can ram!
To the bedroom we go, forget the king-sized bed
I'll bang you up against the wall instead!'
Hands were flying, mouths were connecting
Men on their knees doing the proverbial inspecting
Erections were pointing to the heavens above
Hips were connecting with each fulfilled thrust
Then in my ear I heard the gruff voice
'It's you who I came for, you are my night's choice!'
I opened my eyes to see who it belonged to
Saw my ballet dancer and just wanted to screw
He was tanned and so muscular, I dreaded the chance
Of having his huge cock shoved up my ass
He left the room and returned with a sack
Opened it up and pulled out some crack
His eyes they now twinkled, his smile was playful
Reached in the bag and pulled out a dildo
Spreading my cheeks he tongued my pink hole
As I jerked on his erected twelve-inch pole
He puckered his mouth as he leaned on in
With a smack of his lips, he set to begin
His tongue was so hot, his lips so warm
I screamed in my head 'I'm about to be corned!'
In an instant he had me lying on my back
Legs in the air, licking my sack
His fingers in its target, he began to explore
I couldn't wait anymore, so I turned on all fours
He entered with caution, the goat plastic he wore
Gently he eased in, while calling me his whore
We bucked and we fucked and I cried 'Give me more!
For tomorrow you won't be here anymore!'
He came and he came and it all gushed out
Licked it all up and without a doubt
A bottle of poppers he pulled from his sack
It was my turn to ravish this man on his back
I never said a word but I went straight to my work
Grabbed this enormous dick and began to give it a jerk
It grew and it grew once again in my palm
I opened my mouth while remaining calm
Inch by inch, this gorgeous meat I divulged
Taking a hit of poppers as I became indulged
It went deeper and deeper down my throat
In gay heaven away, I began to float
While massaging the meat of this perfect specimen of a man
I thought of myself as I worked my other hand
Jerking and thrusting with erotic passion
We both became engaged in our action
It seemed like hours had gone by
As I tickled his balls and licked his thighs
We both jerked in anticipation
Where the proverbial instant was joined in unison
Spent and lying on the king-size bed
My ballet dancer and I lay sexually dead
I looked at the clock as it struck ten
And a twinkle in my eye, asked him if he was ready again
By noon he was ready to go
But I wanted just one more blow
He sprang from the bed and grabbed both his sacks
Said he would return but needed to make tracks
The elves were waiting for him at home
He needed to get there before they got stoned
Although he was glad he came to the gay affair
He preferred to have his orgy in his own lair
But before he left my home that day
He gave me his address with an invitation to get laid
Then with a blow of a kiss in mid-air
Ended my fantasy when he did declare
'Joyous Fete'to you all my new-found friends
But this evening now, must come to an end
For it is morning and I must run
My sack is now empty and I am done
But before he disappeared out of sight
He opened his pants to my delight
To this day I will remember: Standing at attention
That twelve-inch dick in full erection!
Author notes
3. Erotica. Gay
Written December 13th, 2004
In a list
- Homo-Erotic (Adults Only Please) • next in list
- Gregg's Golden Cups • next in list
- Gregg's Silver Cups • next in list
- Holiday Greetings • next in list
A contest entry
- Adult Humor by MotherMachineGunn.
335 points, ended December 11, 2006, 8 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - "Twas The Night"...~with a twist~ by deleteit.
900 points, ended December 6, 2006, 8 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Can You Give Weird Al a Run For His Money? by xxRainbowDawnxx.
575 points, ended December 15, 2006, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Santa's Been A Bad Boy. ( Adult ) by Poetryintheblood.
575 points, ended December 8, 2008, 7 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 32 of 32
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12 inch!
I need to get my ruler out...better yet, I need a penis pump. I wonder if those things work? 
Yeah, it's not my usual read, I'm still a puritan who has trouble saying words like, well, I just typed it above...remember those old bathing suits women wore back in the 1920's or so? Those are too skimpy for me, lol, well, not that I'd be wearing them...well, depends on whether i'd done the laundry that day...
The humor spans all sexual preferences and since I like humor, this poem afforded me a lot of it...and for those up for it...I'm sure this is a great way to spend the holidays...(all double entendres intended.)
Merry Christmas Gregg, this certainly was not the Frank Capra version, not that I know what he may have filmed in his free time.
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Blushing
but giggling at the same time, thanks for your entry, Josie 
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HAHA this was funny! I definitely think this one should have placed! Man, there's not enough homo-erotic humour out there! Very well done!
L.
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I have GOT to stop reading this write LOLOLOL...
Thank you for entering this!!!
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Quite amusing!
Well you certainly had me hooked with this delightful little paradoy. It was a wonderful take and sheer brilliance making it a "gay-affair"! Thank you so much for entering this one...Good Luck
~MotherMachineGunn~ -
wowwwwwww
this is brillint i sure hope velvet lets pewrites in coz i think this is a winner its fansastik ...smiles ~cheeky~
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OMG
I saw this link on Velvet Rose's page and I decided to have a read and you know what it does fit the contest perfectly...
Now on this delicious piece of writing if I can call it that...This was hot and it flowed perfectly and it pulls the reader right in till the very last line
So thank you for sharing this with us and I hope she allows you to enter it in her contest because this is definitely a winner
Much Love
Tessa
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How come all the gorgeous gay guys get all the good presents...sighs!!! I truly loved this write without a doubt and it represents everything I am looking for in my contest. I am wanting fresh new writes...however upon the near of the deadline...if there isn't too many entries...I will allow prewrites...and I do hope if that happens that you will enter this one!!! In the mean time-I need a shower, that made me hot...go figure
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oh my what humor,fantastic poetry.good luck.
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oh im sorry, well when you read the whole thing u forget about the first line, and bye the way, i dont count the titles, its just a title, i dont grade on titles, sorry. ok ill make your score a 7 out of 10 even though the contest is all done
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im laughing because not once did you state the words xmas or eve in there, sorry you got a 2 out of 10
Were we reading the same poem? Not only is the title Twas Christmas Eve, but the first line opens the poem with: Twas Christmas Eve, so it was not only mentioned once, but twice!
Gregg
Edited on Dec 22, 4:46 p.m. because ''. -
lmfao, u think im laughing cause its funny, but its not, it great, great rhyming, but im laughing because not once did you state the words xmas or eve in there, sorry you got a 2 out of 10
im very sorry -
hilarious poem. good luck in the contest.
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man! it's a long time since i laughed so heavily. cool rhyming(my opinion). anyways, considering that there are a few more days until the end of this, i hope u get the 1st place.
..and hoping your entry won't be the last one-for the sake of the term "contest"
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great write...made me laugh....good luck!
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Very interesting. Honestly, some rhymes felt illplaced but I had a good chuckle while reading the piece.
Thanks for the little entertainment!
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jesus, this was the fucking bomb. And I wouldnt mind getting some of that 12 inch santa my damn self! Great job!
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Hey good parody I like
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Wow.. Love the picture.. lol...
"Men on their knees doing the proverbial inspecting"
Love the flow of it.. Sounds like a GREAT party..
bleedinggirl -
EXELLENT
WOW this is probably one of the best writes I have EVER read in my life not only is it great wording it made me laugh my ass off lol. I love it I hope to read more of your work hoping and praying they are all as funny. I think I shall have all my gay frends read this one I think they will gt a kick out of it. well good luck keep up the good work.... Kelly Sue -
sexy and funny
this is GREAT! first of all, it has humor, which is always a plus, and in addition, it is the first poem about gay men, which has aroused me! lol. this entire thing is just awesome! -
Hahahahahahaha this was great! I love the background for starters and the guy in that pic is a HUNK. The words are well formed the rhyme is well placed and the whole damn thing rocked
Well done!!! -
Sally does a curtsy
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HO HO HO Gregg, WOW, this is hot! hmmmmm that was some party you had but I loved it,Oh you are getting better Gregg, golly gosh yes! Love Sally
Edited on Dec 15, 9:37 because ''. -
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Damitt, I'm going to lose!
This was very good. It made me laugh, blush, horny and read in awe of your talent all at the same time. Personally erections aren't my thing but erotica and comedy are so... yeha. This kicked ass.
Good luck in the contest!
~JayLynn
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merry christmas indeed! i meant to leave a comment earlier but was caught reading this sexual, to say the least, poem in my local library. oh well. anyway loved it, very funny parody here.
julie -
Wow Gregg... this was really good you did a wonderful job with the rythm and flow
~~Jessica Erin
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Good write. Can't say much to the content though. However you did parody the original very well.
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roflmao ! is that the right thing to say? lol!
nice to read a witty one...
am in stunned silence Greg and if i knew how to blush erm....
elaine
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OH SO GREAT
OMG I loved this. It was funny and easy to read. I really liked the flow of it and how you twisted the actual poem to this. Superb job I must say. I don't even mind the gayness of it all. Great Job and A Merry Christmas to you I must wish.
~later~ -
heh, i liked this. some bits didn't quite flow right, but, on the whole, not a bad re-write :-)
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