Christmas Eve was now in sight
and Olive hoped with all her might
that on this wintry Christmas day
Santa’d let her pull his sleigh.
Flying class was going great,
last time she even missed the gate!
If given the chance, little Olive knew
there was so much that she could do!
Olive smiled and closed her eyes,
imagined telling her goodbyes,
“I’m going to pull the sleigh”
she’d say.
And daddy Donner’d be so proud,
to have a daughter with the shroud
of sleigh bells jingling on her back,
and don’t forget the Christmas sack!
What an honor to carry the joy
of Christmas toys for girl and boy.
And so with bravery asked.
"Santa, I’m up to the task!"
And though the other reindeer gasped,
Santa spoke of Christmas past,
When another reindeer who
we all thought useless turned out to
be the one who led the sleigh
on a foggy Christmas day.
So Olive pulled the sleigh that year
And daddy Donner shed a tear.
If Olive could teach us just one thing
it'd be aim high, go for the dream.
Author notes
Written December 10th, 2004 option 1
In a list
A contest entry
- Partners In Crime members only.. by Partners In Crime.
400 points, ended December 16, 2005, 3 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - #159 A Little Christmas fun: prompt contest by daviscth.
725 points, ended December 1, 2008, 22 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 30 of 30
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lol this is enchanting
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What a delightful poem and I love the lesson it teaches. Thanks so much for sharing this in my contest.
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Lol... I clicked on an old contest accidently, Sarah and ended up here. I still like your poem
and hedk, I'm only two or three years late 
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This is a cute poem, Sarah and with a worthwhile message. Oh yeah, I know, the guys are probably all ancy about having to deal with another woman driver but what the heck,,, they'll get over it
Good luck in the contest
Dee
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Ohh how sweet. This is indeed a wonderful poem. Very well done!!
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Excellent i love this poem and i agree with lostsoul the rhyme scheme is flawless, well done
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Absolutely brilliant, the rhyme scheme was perfect and the srory itself was just wonderful to read. Good on you and goodluck
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this was fun and you rhymed it sooooo well great story too
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No problem, I was the first to enter so there was nothing to comment on. I read and commented on "simply santa"
Sarah -
I really liked this poem its well done but would you comment on one of the other poems please. good luck in the contest liz x
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Lovely write with good rhythm & rhyme. Thanks for sharing & good lick in the contest. La x
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awww thats cute! great write.. good luck
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i loved it!
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I want to meet this fellow one day. Heck maybe If I can get the position of Santa, we'll be best friends. Anyway... yeah this is definantly a work of art. The third Stanza does seem a little weird though... maybe a wording change? Bleh... just trying to help. This is definantly an awesome piece anyhow.
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borninlustturntodustborninsincomeonin
Awww that's so adorable. I love Christmas poems
Very heartwarming. Good job with this, keep it up
~Smidge~ 
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This was a nice Christmas poem. As it had the same title as a children's book I know, I thought it might be based on it. The two works are similar, but yours seems to be your own story. You did a pretty good job with the rhyme. Aside from your spelling of "reindeer", I think you did quite well!
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Awe, that is so cute--and inspirational too! Who needs Rudolph the red nosed reindeer when you can have Donner's little girl!
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Cute very cute, I like the rhyme scheme in this. Alot of the rhyme in this was REALLY great, and then a small little bit of it seemed forced, but not so much that it ruined the poem, cuz the poem was wonderful! Nice Job! For some odd reason it got me ready for Christmas, and I normally don't care for Chrismas, so you did a terrific job in making me wait to open up my presents. Nice job
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Thanks for your suggestions, Aion! I don't have time to check out those things tonight, but when things slow down for me I'm going to mess around with the poem and take all your ideas into consideration.
Edited on Dec 20, 1:35 because ''. -
How cute, we all deserve a chance to prove our selves.
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Here are a few of my thoughts:
If you read the third stanza out loud, it seems like there's only three lines because the last line is so short. Instead of 'she', maybe you could put a longer description of Olive. It would help the rhyme scheme and give at least the same effect.
In the fifth stanza, the second line also seemed a bit short. I feel like you're missing a word in there. But I don't know...it might be strange if you add another word in there. You may have to just experiment, and it may turn out that adding a word would make it worse. Dunno.
But as I said before, I really do love this poem. It's very sweet. ^_^ -
Thank you for your honesty, Aion. This poem really is kind of forced. I don't exactly consider it my best work.... do you have any suggestions for fixing it? A line that would fit better or something? I am open to anyone's suggestions to make this better.
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This is cute ^_^ You do have some awkward lines...some of them are a bit short and threw me off. But I did love the poem, and ti was so well written. Great job!
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awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
and u go girl olive!!
rhi x -
Ok this is cute! I too adore the fact that she's a little girl reindeer that's so cool
great write good rhyming too
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how adorable! I like how Olive was Donner's daughter, it made a cute little story plot, very good!
Love,
Katy
~liquidlullaby~ -
That is so sweet!!!!!!!! I loved it alot, and this is my first time reading fantasy so when she said flying class I was like, hmmm I wonder what school she goes to so that I can take that class! hehe. This was really nice and I could feel all the emotion in this. Nice job on it and I hope you d well in the contest. Oh yeah I forgot, in some poems, the rhyme seemed forced, but not this one, it flowed wonderfully. Good job again and keep up with the great work
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haha. nice nice.. I like it alot. Only if this could come true. Well, anyways Ima let you go. I really like your poems. I like the last part alot.So Olive pulled the sleigh that year
And daddy Donner shed a tear.. It is kind of like real life. Well, hope to read more. I can't wait -
aww...this is cute. I liked it. I especially liked that it was a female raindeer. I mean seriously there are none. But yeah great write.
~later~ -
cute...
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