i
Battle for the Soul
Which way to go?
Who am I?
What is the truth?
Do I belong in heaven or hell?
ii
i dressed up for you (I love you always),
last night
but shyness overtook me,
and I didn't get to see you,
listening to all the voices,
but the rational one of my own
screaming to be heard, but
amongst so much noise, fading away
to silence.
was it really my voice anyway?
Was it my last chance with you?
Was it a chance anyway,
other than in my head?
Do you feel a pull or is it just me?
iii
my past haunts me
her face haunts me
disrupting any hope of sanity in me.
wicked, and creepy with a
presence so disturbing that
no ammount of lipstick can hide it.
Lipstick as thick and pasty
as her unruly tongue.
Rolling eyes like the darkest demon,
I can't breathe.
Along comes the minister of love
Acting insincerely cordial
Towards her, trying to hide
His abhorrence, heightening
The obviousness of his own.
they say I look like her
talk like her
act like her.
she is your mother, no?
ah!!!!!!!!
iv
Now you know why
I can't believe in you
in us
Others say I'm
so beautiful
so innocent
so lovely
so intelligent.
What's holding you back?
You don't see the disturbance
inside my soul
to the core of my being
evidenced to me only
by the reactions of others.
If you did, you would not say
such wonderful things
about me.
Now you know why
I can't open my soul to you
which one do you think I am?
I can't love you.
I can't believe in hope and faith
all those glorious realities.
I can't tell you
who I am
because I don't know
which voice to believe
not having one of my own.
Author notes
Written December 5th, 2004
wow your picture is perfect with my poem! I know you said no prewrites accepted for the 1st option- that is a pity- but anyway- I entered the poem as option 2 and just stuck the picture on it then, lol
In a list
A contest entry
- Anything Goes....Or Does It? by Lowercase Prelude.
1500 points, ended July 8, 70 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - A walk through Shattered mirrors by MaliceInWonderland.
330 points, ended July 12, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 28 of 28
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this is lovely, lustfully dark, with a morbid note...a journey worth taking...the picture was pretty cool as well...good luck and thank you!
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"I can't tell you
who I am
because I don't know
which voice to believe
not having one of my own."
That packed a punch right there. This was a wonderful piece. Good take on the prompt -
Wow. Change the background or text if you want me to read this.
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It's okay I'll withdraw it from your contest. This whole poem and background clash thing goes against my grain too, and usual style, but it's important to the reason I wrote the poem. It was really just a personal musing not for anyone else to read anyway or for a contest...I just thought I'd try and enter it anyway, lol. Duana
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This is just an amazing piece of writing. The music does go with this as well. This is so full of all of your emotion in this write.
It is deep, passionate and raw. You are pouring you whole self out in this and it shows. I found it deeply emotional too. Wonderful beautiful writing from deep within.
Wayne
x
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wow...an amazing crafted poem. wow... you deffinatley have talent
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'I can't tell you
who I am
because I don't know
which voice to believe
not having one of my own.'
I love this last stanaz [=
But, you've forgotten a phrase in your authors notes, can you just edit that please [=
thanks.
great write though [=
♥
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wow, it was a boattle within yourself. i love it!!!!good luck and thanx for entering!!
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the questioning is appropriate here, i think
the soul with fewest answers win.
best of luck in the contest.
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I wanted to stop by to thank you for your comment on my poem silken pleasures and to return the favor. Thank you
I enjoyed all of this but my favorite by far was section II as I thought the imagery in that was superb. Best wishes
Ruth -
it is a good poem but not really what i am looking for now i do like the poem i think it is great and i would love to read more of your work best of luck
david -
good job
Your cheering section has said just about everything that needs to be said. This is a good write, and the ending is perfect.
Jim Dunlap -
FantabulousSoul!!!
Surely I say to you...
in between the body and the Soul,
is the Heart of the Spirit of Love...
Your qeustions, and words bring thoughts to me,
of the outer/inner/Holy courts of God...
for the outer court is like the physical world,
that only sees a story,
and feeds on innocence to only know death is to be...
yet to step into the inner court,
we see a battle within ourselves and all around,
and to know that there are forces happening that we do not fully comprehend...
those voices we hear back and forth,
persuading to know either way, nature, or Life...
but oh, to see the court of the Holy of Holies,
to touch such Grace as the Presence,
of what can only be described as God, as Unconditional Love...
oh now that is the revelation, and the only place to be...
that everything around you has a purpose...
and the question...?...persists...
are you the one who decides such things...
well,
you can hate me,
or you may Love me,
just Please forgive me,
for making you choose between the difference...
because either way,
you made a choice...
and I still Love you...
It's hard to tell the difference,
between Heaven and hell sometimes...
but the choice is always yours,
to try to care or not,
to die with the world,
or Live in Love or not...
I've chosen Love,
and ever since,
thine eyes have seen a difference...
and that so simple song...
Amazing Grace,
has never been so more personal,
than I could ever discribe with words...
your poem is with depth,
and insight,
you look past the outer court,
and are held back in the inner court,
yet,
it is obvious your Heart still pulls to understand,
that Love so undeniable...
though, for now,
as your words express,
confusion has it's way...
but I tell you...
Love is the only pure Spiritual fire,
putting out the physical fires,
of hate/confusion/fear/anger/doubt/intention/and whatever else,
comes from the world to break us down to die...
Love is the only way to Live,
else we find ourselves circumb,
by all the bad examples,
the world has set in front of our eyes...
The choice is always yours...
for you can be in control...
And I say,
do not be left to believe you have no power within you,
to see the difference...
My words may be seen as only opinion,
for a worldly view could dismiss them without a thought,
yet I say them anyways...
for,
this is what your words have brought out of me...
I use to hear those voices as well,
now those voices only listen to me...
if my words are not clear,
and come to you as clinging brass,
then pay no bother,
but I still accept you as you are...
and say...
this was poetical beauty,
and from the deepest of Souls...
I'm amazed in your edicate,
and eloguent style...
I thank you for sharing...
for this piece is related to by many,
I know,
for I use to relate as well...
without reading others comments,
I just see what I see...
and express what's in my Heart to say...
Love ya...
Take care...
God Bless...
Bugs & Phishes
's & 
's
's & Wishes
Rollypollies & Me!
~Glet
rica/C. L. Brandon K.~
As I've come to understand...
the body is the world's...
The Spirit is God's...
and the Soul is ours...yours...
AngelSnot...
Edited on Dec 28, 4:06 p.m. because 'SillyTypos...MeNoKnow!?!...
'.
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I read your comment again, and it's still as poignant as when you first wrote it.
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i love this! i love the different columns you put it into...great job. the second one is my favorite.
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This is wonderful...very emotional and powerful. Every word captivated me and drew me in to continue reading
Fabulous job.
Thank you for your comment on my poem "Inspired (For Night Hope)"...I appreciate your time.
-Emily
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Not that you need another comment or fan but yet I will say something and do think your work is good. I would have to say thought to this I know some of what your have writen here I have experienced and other things you have writen is how one of my girl friends was so put together what you have done is put into words part of the story of my life. I'm impressed. Good write and dont stop writing keep up the good work.
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WOW, this was so powerful...tear this piece got me all excited! i have the same fellings....i love your style, it's interesting and i actually want to keep on reading it.....well, most long writes...or somthing that looks like it would be long gets me bored real fast. i loved this piece so much...i guess it's because i can relate. im not sure if i thanked you before for commenting, but thanks anyways. i really apreciated it. and yes, it would be nice to talk some time...but anyways, keep up the great work and NEVER stop writing!
~tiff -
Yes, I can see the identity struggles in this piece. It's hard to love, to reach out, to step in faith when your uncertain of yourself.
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Wow- cool poem, I liked the mixture of personalities, it also flowed like it was one person despite all the differences- this was especially cool
Great write, I loved it
All the best,
Thanks for commenting on my poem
Pozo
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Hmmmm...I must admit that your words were engaging in a very cerebral way. I was drawn along the length of this journey. The images strongly enveloped me into the eternal struggle that is played out in this poem. I heard your voice in question and contradiction. I always love reading your work. There is an awakening of divergent creativity that flows through your art!
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My Maatkara, you got it dead on
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Excellent example of the inner private dialogue many have at times of emotional distress. The subjects may differ, but the theme is the same. When we are oppressed, controlled or manipulated by others it is hard to tell which to believe - what we are constantly told we are by those close to us, or who we really are.
Well done!
~ G
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Excellent
This is a superior interior monologue with a great voice (or voices) that reads very cleanly. -
This is an amazing piece!! So many voices/personalities clashing together into chaos. The inner workings of the inner self. You have such a great ability to write and express yourself so well. I loved this one.
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Hey, This poem speaks deep to me. I didn't have a voice of my own until they put me on Seroquel. (an anti-psychotic) Now the only voice is me. What a relief to find "me" Such a shame though that the person in this poem is feeling this way. I think my husband probably felt this way before he committed suicide. He just didn't have an outlet to express it. I'm so glad that poetry offers an outlet for so many people to express such deep emotions and confusion. Well done my friend.
~Bezoar -
Excellent!
Duana! This blows me away! Such a strong piece full of so many powerful emotions, they just pour right off the screen. Whoa. This is a really remarkable poem you have here. So many questions...I really like the last part, though it is sad. You've done an amazing job here. -
Duana, you kick ass. that's all there is to it. you write the weirdest things and still make it acceptable.
I don't know how you do it, but it's amazing.
personality #3 is DEFINITLY my favorite:
her face haunts me
distrubting any hope of sanity in me.
wicked, and creepy with a
presence so disturbing that
no ammount of lipstick can hide it.
Lipstick as thick and pasty
as her unruly tongue.
Rolling eyes like the darkest demon,
I can't breathe.
i love it.
keep it up (i'm sure you will)
- forsakenangel
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