Have you ever avoided something for so long
That it has to come looking for you?
Your death looms like a fog enshrouded
Coastal town -- Neither good, nor bad,
But walked around cautiously, quietly.
My acting teacher has your name,
And I only today realized that?
Weird, the most important person
In my life's name shared, but unnoticed?
I meet so few Sharons; it's probably
Why I trust her. Odd, that I've never
Thought about that until now.
Remember when we would go shopping?
Back when one could still smoke while
Pushing a cart down the aisle.
You'd sneak me sugar cubes at your pottery
Store. Where you'd be teaching loud old -
- Ladies how to make dressed Porcelain dolls.
I would sleep in the hay that fed the furnace.
You would take me to pre-school some mornings
In your big white van, with pink lipstick:
My Welcome-Back-Kotter-lunchbox
Afternoons in the swimming pool
Late nights with Johnny Carson
Dinner with family.
Now the family has changed
Recipes have stayed the same
I somehow, some way, am a man:
Taller, broader, older, stronger
Strong enough to miss you
Grandmother, and grieve where
They threw your ashes
To the wind on a mountain.
Asleep, like a child left, I am:
At the door of a stranger
Before the drying petal
And the inevitable
Nature of things
Best kept secret.
'I'm not with you,
But of you' -- Jeff Buckley
Author notes
Dedicated to a great grandmother, and a friend.
Written November 29th, 2004
In a list
A contest entry
- I Am Woman, Hear Me Roar! by Linden Tree Island.
400 points, ended April 29, 2006, 12 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 30 of 30
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this is a most captivating piece ...I miss my grandparents too...
jamila
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Thank you for entering this piece! It fits wonderfully with the criteria of my contest, and for that I am glad.
First off, I love the picture you included. It is a wonderful companion to the poem, and it gives the reader a homely feel that lasts throughout the reading of this write. Thank you for including it!
My favorite two lines are "Now the family has changed \
Recipes have stayed the same" because it gives the reader such a nostalgic impression that is perfect for the ending stanza. Wonderfully done!
As for any critical comments, I'd have to say I would have liked you to have said earlier on that Sharon was your grandmother. While reading the first few stanzas, I was wondering how she was related to you. But you could have written it that way because that is how you wanted the reader's thoughts to be directed, and if so, that is fine. Just my opinion
All in all, wonderful entry and a wonderful write! You are welcome to enter a fresh write in this contest if you would like to do so!
Thanks again -
Lindsey -
Beautiful Tribute
I'm sure she is watching you from afar.As a Grandmother of two totally different little guys,I can only hope I'm making a lasting impression of the positive kind on them also.If we can effect from the next level,the ones we love in this life. She is helping you along even now. This is a gripping thought provolking piece to be sure.~~~Suseann -
AWWWWWW!! How sweet! What a beautiful and sentimental poem to write for your grandmother. I think she would plant a big fat wet juicy kiss right on your cheek and shove a sugar cube in your mouth, all happiness like. This was really good! I like the whole 'story' aspect of it, kind of felt like I was sitting on a couch and listening. Nice job!
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a really freat write here...well done...i know you wont reply coz you neevr do
lol but well done lol
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Great write...
ashley
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Nice how it was also like a story and a dedication. And thank you for not entering the stereo typical mother poem.. I didn't want just "I love you mother", but I knew I'd get it. Thank you for enterting!!!
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This was a very good piece
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I never knew my moms mother really, she died of cancer when I was 3. And my dads mother is an insane drunk.
Well, made me wish I had a grandmother. You are lucky to have such wonderful memories.
Moving piece. I happen to be fond of grocery store memories. -
great
You touched me too very beautiful write I like thiese details too put in it. Best wishes anna
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What a wonderful piece of work her. I was pulled in from the very first lines I read. Very touching.
Anna -
that gave me tears.
N... -
Oh, the sentiment in this, Jeremi... and it made me think of my great grandmother...her name was Virginia and I only recall one other person in my youth who shared that name... it was my best friend all through high school...and before reading your poem, I never even thought of them that way...as sharing the name Virginia. I barely remember my greatgrandmother, saw her only a few times before she passed away when I was about 8 years old...but she was an elegant lady, down to earth but much class. Where as my high school friend was...well, earthy and in a class all by herself...to say the least..and I loved them both.
I love the way you've blended the memory of your beloved great grandmeother with the 'now' of your current Sharron.
Another trip down memory lane, another segment or two of the life of Jeremi B. Handrinos
Dee
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thats really good. someone whos gone is not easily forgotten. maybe thats why theyre not missed til theyre gone. emotional work man. very persona and it hits close to home with anyone whos lost a loved one. thanks for posting it.
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uplifting
a touching tribute to a loved relative, done without excess sentimentality, which is always a difficult task in these kind of poems. you have handled it all very well with your crafted language in this unstructured free-verse narrative poem.
the images and details and feelings you have evoked are of a high standard and keeps this reader interested, right up to the conclusion of the poem and then the apt quote.
thoughtful and uplifting work...
all the best,
myron -
wow this poem is awesome it is very great and great job in doing this.
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i like the seemingly small details that make this more realistic. aka the welcome back kotter lunchbox.
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Thanks
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I naturally gave mine away to some stupid hooker with big tits and a squeamish high pitched cackle.
Edited on Nov 29, 7:03 p.m. because ''. -
It's his bio and his dad's bio done together
In a way that paralells quite creepily and
zeitgeistishly, dig? I don't know, google it. -
I found this to be very touching and sad. At least the images that you describe as memories are vivid and life like. I think you have a fine talent for writing and look forward to reading more of your work. Keep it up.
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no. one's is correct. possessive, sorry
Edited on Nov 29, 7:07 p.m. because ''. -
No. I haven't. Who is the author?
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Yep, done...
Yeah, I went to music school with Jeff,
great guy, I could tell you some great stories.
have you read Dreambrother? I would if
you're a fan. -
Back when one could still smoke while
Pushing their cart down the aisle?
here, i think "their" should be "ones" or "his/her" to jive numerically.
Lipstick
recipes have stayed the same, I think would be better
somehow
Love the Buckley quote by the way -
Wow I am speechless, this poem was amazing. And by the way Welcome Back Kotter was a tight t.v. show, well while it lasted.The guy who played Kotter Looks alot like my father, maybe it's becasue they are related.
Edited on Nov 29, 6:49 p.m. because ''. -
Yes kotter, lol, actually, sure what do you suggest?
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what the hell is welcome-back-carter? Kotter, no? anyway, squishy, melty, heartache verse, which hits the mark.
I have editing suggestions, if you would like to hear them -
Ditto
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Damn.
You are a poet.
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