so alone that every voice you hear echoes through your head but doesn't touch your mind
so alone that you don't even feel the words that could make a person cry
where the blood from you newest cut coming our of your legs speaks to you in words that nobody understands but you
so alone that its like you are stuck in the middle of an island full of nothing and there is a harbor full of boats but none of them seem appealing to you so you just sit there waiting to die
have you ever felt so alone that starving yourself made you feel like you could actually control something in your life
where everything you do to hurt yourself somehow seems to you like it is making you a real person, amazing even
did you ever feel so alone that the voices in your head just stopped completely and you fell down to a pit below hell and just sat there
Author notes
I feel so alone right now its not even funny. sad thing is noone even cares but for some reason i actually do and i hate it. anyways i tried to write this, im sure i will edit it once the words come but i had to get something out or i dont know what i would do. please comment on this so i can fix this piece of shit. yes i know sorry that you all hate when i complaine about how bad my stuff sucks but it does so deal with it cuz i am. lol. love ya guys
later
Written November 20th, 2004
What did you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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Wow, this is great. Especially the phrase
"So alone that every voice you hear echoes through your head, but doesn't touch your mind"
Love it.
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great
Awsome poem your expression is really felt in this! -
Hey, see that comment above mine? ^^^^ That's my exbest friend, and her "Lover" was my (now) exboyfriend. I honestly didn't know she'd commented on this first (small world). Anyway, I really can relate to this, having just lost the 2 people I've ever loved, when I thought that death would be the only thing to kill our bond.
The loneliness...It's agonizing, isn't it? You feel like something's so wrong, so horrible inside. You feel it near your heart, but closer the the middle of your chest; like a hole is forming there. You feel empty, like your heart and soul have been stolen, but at the same time, you feel heavy; weighed down with anger, heartache, depression and hopelessness. Silence is loud...It makes your ears ring, and time almost completely disappears. I know how this feels...I've known it for almost a month, now. The days get longer and longer, but sometimes it seems as though they fly by. The nights make you feel kindred, but they could never fill the gap of humanity. You become desperate for something to hold on to...Begging for some kind of prayer, some ray of sun in this God-awful abyss of hatred, silence, rejection and loneliness.
So dead...Yes, I can relate to this.
You'd do anything to feel, even though all you can feel is grinding pain, and all you can do is remember things that used to make you happy, but they now haunt you. -
Hey der, I really liked this. I was just like how i felt last night. I don't think it's been worse before. I lost the two things that mattered to me in this world. My best friend, and my lover. But my friend was the only person who has ever cared about me. She loved me and hated me at the same time because of all the things i've done to her. Never purposly...but still. I know how you feel. I dont starve my self cuz i love food! But i'm a cutter and the two have a relation. They make us feel alive. To tell the truth...I don't know if I like that feeling. but it's better than not feeling at all. I'd like to talk w/ you more. Do you have yahoo? Very nice. Keep it up girl!
-Sara- -
sad and great
Wow this is so sad. I'm sorry you feel alone. I used to feel that way too and I hated it. Even though I had friends who were there for me I still felt like I was a dark bubble and there was noone there to help me out. But eventually It popped and out emerged a new me. Don't give into it though. I still feel this way sometimes but I just vent all of it out in my poems and talk to my friends and they help me out. Don't keep it all in though
its not the best way I did that and it just got worse. But yeah I hope you feel better. Take care.
Serena* -
Wonderful job with the poem
Dude I totally relate to this. I keep getting in fights with my dad. I keep leaving. Things keep going wrong. But luckily I have someone that pulls me up from my hole and helps me carry on. But even sometimes when shit just isn't coming out the way it should I shut down. I cut and cry and sit in a corner and stare into space and shit. It's not lovely. Life's tough chica. I'm sorry. I'm here for you if you ever need me just email me sweetie. i love you lady. Stay safe... this pain can only make you stronger. -
so alone that its like you are stuck in the middle of an island full of nothing and there is a harbor full of boats but none of them seem appealing to you so you just sit there waiting to die
man, that really related to me...it's like i'm sitting here with all these people wanting to help me get better...but instead, i just sit back and ignore them, thinking that it wouldn't work anyways, or that they really don't mean it...so i just continue to go deeper and deeper into this hell hole that i've made myself fall into.
Christina
you did such a wonderful job with this! -
you rock
i dont think its a piece of $hiT.... i think its from your heart, its real, the things from the heart are that, when your honest about yourself, really honest, then thats a work of art, i really like your piece, i really do, ive been that alone too...not saying i know how you feel, but i know how i felt when i was in a similar situation, maybe not even close.........so thanks for your work of art from your heart, its good to get it out, better out than in, and now your problem is halved cos you let it out,,,,,,,keep it up darls
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