(The Leave-taking)
Across the Sylvan plains,
through the Golden Woods,
the water trickles sweetly.
Grasses in the wind,
leaves shake in the trees,
whispers sounds repeatedly.
The sun shines so bright,
the rain falls so cool,
refreshing all the earth.
It restores the life,
brings it back again,
the miracle of birth.
Birds fly in the sky,
horses run the plains,
the pulse runs through the land;
darkness known so long,
now but memory,
disappeared like shifting sand.
An age now has gone,
the time now arrived:
a changing of the guard.
The transient trudge towards home;
the native hold their breath,
the leaving found too hard.
For there is still much for them to do,
they find many reasons to tarry,
the pull of the land is much too great,
they hesitate.
They will not leave,
they hesitate.
Choices mulled and made,
lines of decision drawn;
divide who stay and go.
Shattered lives are left,
chaff across the land,
the bitterness is all they know.
The guardians will remain,
let them who will go forth;
they never really were here.
A stepping-stone until
they returned back home,
wave goodbye and shed a tear.
Understanding not
the driving force behind
the ones who feel they must leave.
Those who choose to stay
never will forget;
an endless lifetime left to grieve.
Waves crash on the sand,
wind whips through the hair,
the voices rise in song.
Without backward thought,
for who would remain,
they only know for what they long.
This song is based on a tune called Fields of Gold. You can find it at
http://www.llyric11.angelcities.com/FaeMid/fieldsofgold.mid
Author notes
Song of those left behind.
Entered in the contest: Music Madness by lathwen
http://allpoetry.com/contest/1307848?notheme=1
Entered in the contest: Poem About Your Favourite Film
by Alpha - Omega
http://allpoetry.com/contest/1316847
Surprise, it did not win. They could not figure it out.
Written March 13th, 2004
July 9th. That is all I am willing to give. I did read the rules.
Fireflies still die when they hit the bug zapper by bdean2020
http://allpoetry.com/contest/2349540
Did not place and after reading the winners, I am wondering why he asked for lyrics, as all they were were poems; no rhyme or rhythm. I am tired of this.
In a list
A contest entry
- Poem About Your Favourite Film by Alpha - Omega.
330 points, ended June 19, 2005, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Fireflies still die when they hit the bug zapper by bdean2020.
560 points, ended May 23, 2007, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
A critical comment is invited.
Comments
1 - 15 of 15
-
I'm sorry, but I cannot accept this entry into my contest without knowing you read the rules; you can add it again to my contest, as long as I know you've read the rules.
-
-
Complied.
-
-
sorry if I just removed it then - I wasn't expecting that so fast.
-
-
-
Glad you liked it. If you are a fan of the movie, it will not be hard to figure it out.
-
I dont know what movie it is, but it was a great poem.
-
no not a clue, im thinking
-
I cannot think that you have not seen the movie. Not even a niggle of an idea? LOL
-
IM me if you think you know, and I will tell you.
-
Dont know this movie, but the poem is very good, i like your style of writing. Good luck in the contest.
Alpha - omega -
Yay!!!!!! I know what movie this is!!!!!!!!!!! Like Caducus said, it is dream like. Very good poem.
-
Again, not random. The third and sixth lines rhyme. Except the bridge which does not rhyme until the last lines. Anyway, if you think of it as a ballad instead of a poem, then it works. I am glad you liked it. The subject is somthing that is dear to my heart. And, it was written for a specific genre of literature. It just does not fit in well on this site. Thank you for the comment.
-
Hmmm this is realy nice, but your rhymeing seems to be off to me. A bit random. I like the meaning though, I followed it rather well. Nice! Thanks for entering my contest and good luck!
~Lathwen -
Hmmm, you got that from it? It is actually a lament for the passing of the elves and the difficult choice to leave or stay. Which, if you think about it, was escapism. Thank you for reading and commenting. I do hope you listened to the music as you read it. It does make it easier and adds to the overall effect, IMOO.
-
freeing
Shame, real shame this has not had a wider readership. This has a real dreamlike quality to it full of pagan images and though its not challenging its power is how you capitalize maximum effect through each carefully constructed line which culminates into a manifestation of beauty, solitude, and total escapism.
______Very nice______ -
The rhyme and scan seemed a little erratic – to me anyway. I’m not sure I quite follow the metaphor, although I have read Lord of the Rings several times. It seemed to me more going out with a bang or fading away – they were passed their sell by date… I’ll come back and have another look when I am less heavy eyed…
Adding your comment:
1 - 15 of 15
3 old applause
