Is it comfortable?
The berber rug against your skin
Is it enlightening?
As I steal your soul away
Steal it all away
From the inside
Praise to the altar
That's tied to the floor
Nothing as beautiful
As I make you a goddess
Is it pleasuring?
Your screams and moving temple
They only will hurt you more
Don't resist
The screams
The squirming
The tears will wash your pains away
The feeling deep inside you
The altar shines
Broken on the ground
Nothing as beautiful
My sweet sweet goddess...
Author notes
This is the strangest I've written now. I guess this has clinched the fact that I am one twisted person...
Please constructive comments only
Written November 7th, 2004
What did you think
Comments
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Good job, kinda weird, but im a weird kinda person so I liked it!! *~ ksomea324 ~*
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shamoke, I actually have this in a structured format. This is a song I wrote, it has a bass, guitar, drums and a synthesiser, or computer generated sound effects.
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its not so strange... the only thing i would have made different would be the actual structure itself, making it more consistent... by doing that, i feel that the piece itself would hold a little more power, give a bigger punch... otherwise, i thought it was great... kinda eerie with the message being so easily twisted, but it was excellent... thanks for sharing!
Edited on Nov 08, 4:43 p.m. because 'im a moron... forgot the main part!'.
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