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Untitled

I stare into the darkness
The darkness has consumed me
It makes it seem
As if you were never there
Sitting. Wondering. Contemplating.
Trying to manifest my thoughts and feelings
To conclude what is mentally wrong with me
Why I chose to hid
To isolate myself
Frmot he hurtful stares
And cruel words
From the never ending prejuidce of society
Why I'm different from my peers
Why I do not give in to the pressure they put off
I'll leave that as a mystery
A mystery that will go unsolved
You can try to second guess
And try to rationalize my thoughts
But you'll never truely understand
The pain that is deep inside my sould
That night that changed it all will go unknown
I'll never let on
It's hidden beneathe my happy mask
The mask I put on for a show
A show that will leave everyone with a false reality
That nothing is ever wrong
Until the mask falls off
Exposing my one true self
But never truely exposing what is really happening
NO matter what is said to me
Or how you try to help
The damage has already sunken in
It can not be undone
I've dealt with it for this long
I'll continue to deal
The razor sharp stings of depression
Are crepping inside of me
Cutting deeply
Bleeding away everything I ever stood for
Pulling me down
And pushing everyone else away
Perhaps I don't fully comperhend
How I truely feel
Or what is happening to me
And if I do not know
Then why Should you?

Author notes

I got bored in Geometry class....
Written November 1st, 2004

A contest entry

What did you think

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments


  • Scindr
    April 10, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    This poem was a introspective poem, based on the person in the poem. The constant refereces later in the poem to the mask and the fact that he is hiding is clear. Though at the beginning of the poem he is searching. The theme finds that even though he is aware that he wears the mask to hide, he can not even see himself anymore. This is evidenced by your last few lines and the statement to the reader. This poem had good flow and excellent wording [with a few typos]. Good luck in the contest.


  • dearjealousyx
    February 21, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Okay, overall this was pretty good. I know exactly how you feel.. I used to think that no one understood the way I felt, but when I joined this site, I started reading the poetry here and realized that I wasn't quite alone. A lot of people have felt the exact same way some time or another. I also got the part about confusion of how you feel.. it's a hard feeling to explain, but you did it without even trying to tackle explaining it. Nice job. I saw a few typos and mistakes that you might want to look over and correct. I'll put them in parenthesis:
    "It's hidden (beneathe)"
    "(Frmot he) hurtful stares"
    "The pain that is deep inside my (sould)"
    "Are (crepping) inside of me"
    "Perhaps I don't fully (comperhend)"

    Thanks for entering and good luck.

    [Kayla]

  • Sweptindarkness
    December 5, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    Tis is amazing! I love this part:It's hidden beneathe my happy mask
    The mask I put on for a show
    A show that will leave everyone with a false reality
    That nothing is ever wrong
    Until the mask falls off
    Exposing my one true self
    But never truely exposing what is really happening.
    Its a wonderful write! Keep up the great work. I can't wait to read more.
    Samantha