President Bush has the support of Mayor Giuliani
(Former Mayor of New York City),
Tommy Franks, Bob Dole, and Arnold Schwarzenegger.
But not to worry, Kerry supporters!
A very, uh, notable celebrity has come to the aid
of John Kerry's campaign, too!
Who is it??
Jerry Springer
PERFECT.
(Oh, and Osama Bin Laden wants Kerry to win, too!)
Author notes
For more funny pics like this one, visit www.modernhumorist.com
Written November 1st, 2004
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1 - 21 of 21
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If I wouldn't be arrested for voicing my opinion I would but since I can't I'll just say that I would have liked it better if Kerry would have won....Not Bush...Bush needs to ..... Never mind.....I'm totally against him and we'll leave it at that.
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THIs was hilarious Mark..even im not going to tell you for who i voted..hahahaa...later my freind..great write!
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Haha!
This is so funny Uncle Mark 
I voted for Bush and I am so glad he won 
I found this so funny it amde me laugh and smile Thanks for making my day Uncle Mark, Good Job 
---Sara
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lol this was great. It made me laugh. I voted for Bush. I really dont agree w/ Kerry's morals.. although Bush needs to work on our economy more, hes a good president. instead of whinning about things, he got up and took action.. yes we wet to war and yes people lost their lives, but they did it in honor of our country and they kept us alive. They all have my blessing, respect and prayers. This was a great write! :-)
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hahahahhahahahaaaa!!! Awesomely way cool!
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Sorry for assuming you were a liberal, Artis. The way you lit into me over this obviously humorous post gave me that impression.
Thanks for saying, "Have a lovely life." That's very nice of you. Same to you!
Mark -
I'll say this much: if bin Laden were to drop dead right at this precise moment, I'd probably call in sick tomorrow and have a party to celebrate.
I'll be glad when all this bullshit is overwith; I'm tired of seeing annoying campaign commercials, including the ones that're pro-Bush. -
you bought into the lies, and the explosives were documented after occupation, to much fox and not enough abc films of it, but hey, you live with the results if he wins, you are single, and probably do not have flesh at stake in this war, so it is easy to declare it fitting...I am done arguing, I will simply
count the dead marines and soldiers as they rise in number, and wish we had had smarter leaders to commit too, I never said I was for kerry, just tired of bush and all of his miscalculations, and his failure to kill the one man who needs to die. I was a Marine Corps sharpshooter, perhaps with some training in the language and some skin dyes and some money expended, I might take a shot at the fifty million on his sorry ass head, otherwise it will never get done......to bad there are not more mercenaries looking to score some big cash.....a team could do wonders, I am no liberal, I am just a former soldier
tired of watching men die under conditions unfair to them.have a lovely life. -
LOL, yep, that's what I'm saying too
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Hey Lyrical,
Ha! That's hilarious. Call me crazy, but I have a feeling Bin Laden is thinking about his own security more than any desire to make Americans feel more secure. He's probably tired of living in caves, though it should come naturally for a rat like him.
Any enemy of Bin Laden is a friend of mine! lol
Thanks,
Mark -
hahahahaha....I just heard on the radio this morning that Bin Laden had announced that the states that vote Kerry in are considered states that want peace with him (Bin Laden).... What's that tell ya? Cool poem.
~Lyrical
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artis,
Don't remove your remark. It didn't bother me at all. In fact, I reacted with much less heat than you directed at me. When I posted this obviously light-hearted piece of fluff, I didn't expect anyone to come at me with "Heed my words, ye Republicans! If George Bush is re-elected, there will be great wailing and moaning and gnashing of teeth! Your babies will be blattered against curbs and you will scream in horror to the heavens, and God will urinate on you from on high!"
Note that I even refrained from calling you names like "simpleton". Ah, the liberal mindset. If the Republican mindset is desiring to stop evil rather than let it go on as long as it doesn't affect me personally, then by all means, call me a Republican.
Regarding the draft, the only ones talking about that are Democrats, particularly Kerry in another deceitful attempt to turn people against Bush.
Speaking of deceit, it has been proven that the amount of "missing explosives" was exaggerated. It was 3 tons, not 380. It has also been proven that the explosives were removed BEFORE our troops arrived. Kerry had egg all over his face, as usual, because he rushed to produce a TV commercial within 24 hours (it usually takes 3-5 days) and jumped all over Bush before he verified the facts. That commercial is still airing, though everybody now knows the truth.
I do think you make some good points. I agree that we should have nailed Bin Laden. I agree that we need to stop Afghan heroin production. All good things in time.
I also agree that things could have been handled better, but I have no guilt about the fact that Hussein is now in prison with plenty of time to meditate on his dark soul.
Sorry about the error re. your spelling. I didn't realize you were doing it intentionally. And for what it's worth from a simpleton Republican - lol - thank you for your service to our country.
Mark
Edited on Nov 02, 1:58 p.m. because ''. -
i'm not one to comment on things like this mainly because the veiw of others can be so strong to take such a fun loving friendly site and make it a war zone WOW i did how ever enjoy your write mark i saw the humor in it and man did i laugh about the truth behind it i saw a big bumper sticker across the back window of a truck the other day i thought you might enjoy it it said "one bush one dick just like god entended" talk about having guts i would fear a brohen window keep it up i love reading from you
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artis,
I hate to tell you this, but you sound just like one of those guys on the corner with the big "THE END IS NEAR" signs. I mean, listen to yourself. Are these warnings or hopes?
"If am-bush gets in you will die
in a sand blasted wasteland."
"You will die sucking sand
into your nostrils and wondering
why the iraqis gather to spit on you
and defecate on your remains
as your spirit is lifted up
to some juster reward for your sacrifices."
"You are a future draftee
into a war without hope
in a land that despises our
demoncratic and repuglican asspirations."
"Godspeed to you when the time comes,
hopefully they won't saw off your head
with a rusty knife,
as they have other unavenged Americans....
peace to you and yours."
To end all that with "peace to you and yours" is especially ironic.
And "demoncratic and repuglican asspirations" ??
At least learn how to spell before you come at me with insane drivel like this.
As far as 100,000 dead civilians, where did you hear that, on Al Jazeera network? With so many people oblivious to the true nature of evil, who just want to sit around singing "Give Peace A Chance" and hoping we don't get sucker-punched again, how likely do you think it is that estimates of Iraqi civilian casualties are going to be exaggerated? If the terrorists had any honor or courage whatsoever, or any concern for their fellow citizens who they claim to be fighting for, they would separate themselves from the civilian population and fight like our soldiers do. Believe me, Bush and the entire U.S. military mourns every civilian (non-terrorist) casualty. That's why our troops are getting blown up by car bombs and shot by snipers hiding in mosques - because we are performing micro-surgery, trying to weed out the terrorists who hide like rats among the civilian population. If we wanted to keep our soldiers out of harm's way, we could just carpet bomb the entire country. To accuse our troops of carelessly blowing away civilians is dirt ignorant.
And as usual, as you criticize the war, you give no alternatives. Liberals never do. Monday morning quarterbacking is all you're good for. Should have done this, should have done that, but no other suggestions are made regarding what to do about madmen who want to destroy everything unlike themselves. So what is the answer, oh wise one? Do nothing and hope the terrorists leave us alone? They attacked us under the Carter and Bush (Senior) administrations. They've been attacking us for decades. To think they'll go away if we just ignore them is ridiculous. Clinton wanted to take out Hussein too in 1998 but Congress turned him down. "The wrong man"? I don't think so. He was a terrorist-funding tyrant with plans to develop WMD's. He wiped out the Kuwaiti's with them and killed 1.3 million Iraqi's. If you aren't against someone like him, who are you "for" exactly? We had to start somewhere in the war on terrorism. We started with him and the Taliban, and the world's better off for it.
The main question I have for you is this -
If you are so broken up about people dying, why don't you care about the people who were dying under Hussein? Are the people who are accidentally killed by American bombs the only deaths that matter to you? What about the 1.3 million killed by Hussein, thousands of whom were children who were blindfolded and shot in the head? Does stopping this kind of thing matter to you?
I see you brought up Abu-Ghraib again, another imagined feather in the liberal cap. Yes, what our soldiers did there was disgraceful, but what Hussein did there before we arrived was 1000 times worse, and every Iraqi knows it. That place was a chamber of horrors. The reason we don't see the footage of Abu-Ghraib under Hussein's watch, aside from the fact that the liberal news media doesn't want us to, is that it is so horrific, it cannot be viewed. Have you ever seen children stripped naked and stung by scorpions and spiders in front of their parents? That was one of Hussein's favorites! How about nailing someone's tongue to a wooden plank, or cutting off breasts and penises with a carving knife? But yeah, our soldiers were so much worse than that, making dogs bark at those poor terrorists.
Check out some of the footage in Faren-hype 911, a new film about what was going on in Hussein's "sovereign nation". But be careful - it might expand your mind.
I've learned a lot about liberals since 9/11 - mainly that they have the lion's share of the anger and intolerance - as your hate-filled comments clearly demonstrate. Bush/Cheney signs are being torn off lawns and ripped to shreds and cars with Bush stickers on them are being vandalized all over America. Jerry Springer joining Kerry's campaign just proves what I already knew - that Kerry has cornered the trash vote.
Edited on Nov 02, 12:03 because ''. -
I saw an article where Kerry supporters were holding up signs with the number 6 on them and the photographer captured Kerry - with 666 behind him! How appropriate. great write mark!
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I heard that Jerry and Kerry will run together in 2008. That way you would have an inflated pompuse jag off that talks out of his ass and a talk show host. LOL. Jack
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Artis, whether you agree or disagree with this person's views, perhaps your own "writings" should go where they belong so that others can comment in a more appropriate way. This site give you plenty of options.
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Yeah, sad isn't it!
Don't forget Zel Miller is supporting the President too, now there's a real hero! (i.e. a gentleman Democrat with integrity: extremely endangered species)
Have you heard this one?
Q: What do you call a lawyer gone bad?
A: Senator.
~ G
Edited on Nov 16, 1:44 because 'changed pic referenced'. -
Well, I'm still laughing! I sent this to my husband, and he will post it on another site if you don't mind. It will get plenty of attention there. LOL Thanks for a good read!
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Lol, ooh, what a slam. And it's the truth too. I'm still undecided but with a poem like that..... well hell! I might just go Bush! Awesome write.
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Somehow, Springer, Kerry and Bin Laden make such a wonderful menage a trois. I'm not in to watching, but it looks at least interesting!!!!!!
I understand that Kerry is trying to get Osama a California driver's license? Is that true? That's just what I heard. Hope it's not just rumor.
Also, I hear Osama is voting for Kerry via video tape. Makes sense to me. It's as legal as many of the votes in Florida last time when the demos were caught with voting machines in the back seat of their cars on election day there.
This is a cute post though I'm not sure it is a poem.
Hey, did you see Kerry in his hunting fatigues? LoL... what a funny thought... Kerry out there (the man that he is) wearing fatigues, carrying a shotgun.... gunning down geese etc. Oh boy, he's my hero now! Then, there is his wind surfing. Do you think he got a lot of votes doing that commercial?........ surfing along in flower boxers? lol
By the way.... everyone keeps saying that Kerry was just following orders of the United States Gov't when he committed all those atrocities.... and I'm sure he was. But, let's look at the line-up. Johnson was the President when this all escalated (a major screw up demo) and Congress was completely demo. What? Kerry was following the orders of a complete majority of democrats. I think he is right..... maybe they should blame our country.... maybe he should complain.... against his own party. Geeeeeez.... now that is idiotic.
Giuliani, Franks, Dole, Schwarzenegger, Powell, Cheney, Rice are just a few of the Bush team. And what is Kerry's again.... let's see........ my foot is still tapping.
Nice write Mark,
Don
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