The order in command
To give soldiers to bear arms
Or we duped to fallow past demands
In a society of soldiers going to alarms
We fool our young into believe
War is the answer
Drafting our young to achieve
Into beliefs that cancer
Idealist propaganda's of incarceration
To force issues to win a war
But to my opinion of deviation
Brings war whether we want or else, rapport
I'm against idealist who plagues our young
To believe it is their duty
Yet those idealist praising songs that sung
Freedom, when their turning their back on the beauty
That which we stand to loose
If we falter beliefs of draft
Trying to solve their problem excuse
Keeping a nation free from the ultimate craft
Author notes
I've read and commented "The Past Returns"-Kris
Written October 10th, 2004
In a list
A contest entry
- Something Original by DarkDayzInc.
300 points, ended June 22, 2005, 26 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
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War is the answer
Drafting our young to achieve
Into beliefs that cancer
Idealist propaganda's of incarceration
To force issues to win a war
But to my opinion of deviation
Brings war whether we want or else, rapport
I'm against idealist who plagues our young
To believe it is their duty
i liked this poem -
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Hi there
Hi! there I'm glad u dropped by and read my poem and the wonderful sentiments given r most welcome. Saddie23
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Awesome poem!
Great win! Congratulations!
It reminds me, as a history major, more of the Civil War than of these days. But well penned!
Keep up the good work! -
Well, there isn't really a lot that I can say about this poem. I can definately see your point of view on this. I cannot however like the way you wrote. It seems so choppy. Your stanzas have no real order though you do make an attempt at a rhyming scheme, the messed up stanzas bring that down. Put a little more thought into your poem.... decide whether or not it is going to be freeform or not. If it isn't then don't let it go all over the place. If it is then the rhyming really made it a lot worse than what it should have been.
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Thank you for liking my poem and commenting. Saddie23
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That was a good poem, I truly believe that is was well written. I personally believe that the draft will not be put to use again...at least I hope not. But none the less this is a great work! Good luck in the contest.
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Thank you for gracious comments. Saddie23
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an interesting poem... i like your view points on this situation... alot of truth... anyways great poem! keep it up!
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im not saying bush shud leave n let kerry come bc kerry wud kill us n bush will kill our country
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He is going to get his this time. So, vote for Democratic party straight down. Saddie23
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ok i am really sorry i never commented i could have sworn i did. i do agreet he war ont error is long overdue but why now? why not before? is this really a war on terror or is this bush's excuse to hide behind. i htink this is him trying to fix somethign his father couldn't. this si greata dn you show you emotion well. i dotn believe their should be a draft wtf is up with that? if the people dont want to fight maybe he doesnt have as much support as he had hoped but to pry away people from what they want and force them into war is suicide so i beleive america is at its worst state yet. i have one thing to sa y which will get great controversy but FUCK BUSH N HE SHOULD GET HIS FUCKING ASS OUT OF THE WHITE HOUSE BECAUSE HE HAS KILLED OUR COUTNRY ENOUGH! HE SHOULD GET OUT WHILE THER EIS STILL TIME TO MAKE THINGS RIGHT ok great job and good luck.
love always and forever,
drew
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I still believe we follow past mistakes to say we aren't still duped. I believe war on terror is over due, but we dupe the answers to questions to our young in believing war is the answer. Saddie23
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well done
I personally don't see the need for the draft coming yet, as there are too many enlisting for this war already. But we need to remember that as this progresses, this might be a necessity. If this had been headed off in the 60's and seventies as it should have been, this war would not have been needed as much as it is today. But we had too many in for glory through a financial war in Nam, that we should not have been in, or done right in the first place.
The war on Terror is something that has been long over due, and one that should have been fought a long time ago. If the UN had ever done its job this would have been, but as always they screwed up here too.
Nicely said, even though I disagree with you. We are not being duped any more, the UN has done that for years, and it is finally coming to view, as well as what has been needed for decades.
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