Through the darkness a single candle glows
A beacon calling out, please come home
Life is a journey, its end it soon shows
Through the darkness a single candle glows
Sands of time vanish, as the wind blows
Lessons learned, no more will I roam
Through the darkness a single candle glows
A beacon calling out, please come home
Author notes
Susan (nogenreneeded) helped me with this. It is my first attempt at a triolet. So if it sucks, you know who to blame.
Just kidding.
Written October 10th, 2004
In a list
What did you think
Comments
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Soul stirrer.......
Oh dear...this is superb! You know, I have been feeling terribly low since the 16th because a very dear uncle of mine has passed away on that day. It was a sudden thing totally unexpected because he had been well. I met him last year and had couple of meals with him wherein I cooked, made tea, etc..it has been so heartbreaking and the tears haven't stopped spilling from my eyes. This triolet made me instantly think of uncle...as though he guided me here. I miss him immensely but yes, he is now in a far better place than where he was. That is the one thing which gives me solace.
The rhyme and word choice here is excellent. I have been counting the syllables on all the triolets I am reding thus far to see if any has been written in iambic tetrameter or pentameter, but so far I haven't found any.
Thank you for writing this wonderful triolet,
Charishma
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Well this by far surpasses my first attempt at this form. A very well written piece.
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Awww this is such an awesome write. I really like this. It is penned so beautifully and wonderfully. You did an awesome job on this Sweet Cheeks.
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That was good, but your stories are far better.
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this one puts a tear in my eye it reminds me of other things you have wrote
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Beautiful!!!!!!!!!!
Wow John, this is amazing and so beautiful! I really love it and I am bookmarking this one!! Tonight, a resident died at where I work at and this poem is like soothing to me because when you see people suffering from a lingering ilness or ilnesses you know when they die that they are being called off into another place! Like your poem here saying like a beacon calling out, please come home.....you have done a beautiful and wonderful job here!! -
I'm not really sure what a Triolet is, but your flow and wording are really quite lovely. It read very melodically, almost like the chorus from a love ballad. If this if your first attempt, I think you should try it again and again.
~Denise -
I wouldn't know a triolet from a hole in the ground, but I know this is good. lol Nice one!
Mark -
hmm, I feel like I can't leave an educated comment because honestly I don't know the form, but I will trust that Susan taught you well! And I like the content -the candle being the beacon enduring the blowing winds of change...
nice work!
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Awesome stuff man
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wow...i really luv this poem
i certainly does not suck!!!
i luv da way u repeat the line: through the darkness a single candle glows
i luv this sooooooooo much!!
congrats on a totally rockin poem!
XxelmojonesxX -
Well if YOU think that it sucks then it sucks every well..Hmm did you understand what i just said..i hope so..anyway i very much enjoyed this piece i hope to read more of your work..
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Oh...if sheer beauty sucks than this is the suckiest...lol
I adore it so very much. It has so much meaning to it. It can be used for so many things. A very versatile piece. I am so glad I came to read this...it means more than I could tell you.
SAm
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Geat write you have produced there, the essence at least to me is that as people we like to wander i.e to discover ourselves. But eventually we have to go home because that's the only place that we only feel safe.
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HaHa...
It does not suck and I do not think it will be your last triolet either...
You have done a great job of building on a simple refrain and turning it into poetry.
I look forward to your future efforts in this direction... Or you gonna try a villanelle next????
Susan












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