It’s tough to watch the man you love
Struggle through each day
It breaks your heart when you can’t do
Enough to chase the pain away
It’s hard to keep from crying
When he struggles in his sleep
And you know the pain he suffers
Has worked its way that deep
He’s still the man who loves you
That one that you’d die for
But the truth is things will never be
Quite like they were before
The passion that you shared so well
Now has an awful price
And the anguish borne for pleasures sake
Dulls desire like ice
It’s agony to know that years
May pass without relief
But you can’t add to his burden
So you pray in silent grief
The helplessness of waiting
Wears upon your soul
As he tries to do the things he loves
And ignore the stabs he can’t control
I watch him curse the weakness
That he can’t overcome
I’m awed as each day passes
And he refuses to succumb
I don’t know how he makes it
But I’m his biggest fan
He’s one of God’s great wonders
A strong, but mortal, man
Patricia Gibson-Williams
For my Joe… The strongest man I know.
In case you’re wondering Joe has had 6 (major) surgeries in less then 2 years. The easiest one was supposed to be for a herniated disk, but he developed a staph infection that his doctor didn’t treat aggressively enough. The infection got into the bone and disk and caused agonizing pain in his back and legs. We had to find another doctor to do surgery to remove the infected tissue and repair what damage he could. He then had to spend 6 weeks on IV antibiotics and is now 3 months into what is supposed to be a minimum of 6 months on oral antibiotics. His back pain is much better, but he has AVN (the bone is dying) in his right hip and needs to have hip replacement surgery. He is in constant pain and even when he sleeps he can’t find total relief. The problem is they can’t tell (and will never be able to) if the infection is gone. In a few months or years or longer, if they can ascertain that the infection is dormant and the bone has collapsed too much for him to walk they will attempt to replace the hip. Even then there is a very high chance that the infection could migrate to his hip and cause even more problems. This morning as I watched him sleep knowing he was in pain by the expression on his face and the small moans he made, I couldn’t help thinking that with what he has been through he is the strongest man I know. ~ Patti ~
Written October 8th, 2004