My fear is coming back
I'm starting not to care
I was going so far
now I am starting to go back
I don't want to do this
I don't want to push you away
But I am scared of moving forward
So that is what will happen
I am starting to be happy all the time
Starting to actually have friends
Starting to be alive
Now I'm scared again
So what do I do?
I don't want to lose them
I don't want to lose what I have gained
But I fear I might
I don't know how to stop it
I don't know how to start caring again
I'm just so scared and I don't know why
So what do I do?
How do I overcome this fear
How do I continue to move up
I don't want to go back to the beginning
But more importantly....
I don't want to lose the friendships
The ones that are genuine
The ones that are pure
I don't want to push them away
I don't want to be alone again
I don't want to be just the one that can help
I don't want that again
So what do I do?
I can help others
I can fix their problems
But I can't fix mine
Can you?
Author notes
my fear
Written October 2nd, 2004
