Cloven hooves, clatter across
the cobblestones grating 'against
flint and stone:
Eerie silences echo from the
moon's glowing red dull hue;
Storm clouds gather with mounting
pace, casting blanket shrouds to
hide from light glimmered moon;
Lucifer, awaits with the horse
of plume ... all knowing, all seeing;
Wilfully, tugging at souls in torment,
dragged to their doom; In despair,
they cry out, we listen from far
off, only guessing at the words
uttered; The plea's often falling on
deaf ears; As he gathers his souls
towards him, a small one escapes
and with a cry from the bowels of
the earth, this devil cries ..."you are mine!";
suddenly, the clouds part with ragged
abandon, moonlight bathes the world with
soft yellow, the soul ,who escaped whispers
"help....please can I not be saved"?; The saving
is within yourself, reach deep and find your
peace of mind... your guide, to a purer way,
as you walk the path of life............
Author notes
things won't be better tomorrow
Choice 4#
Commented on "Society for the suicides" by Morbid rain
Written September 19th, 2004
In a list
A contest entry
- 4 choices poem and short story contest by heartatselfdestruct.
300 points, ended December 19, 2004, 4 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 20 of 20
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Thank you
your comments are greatly appreciated 
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Great ending, positive and helpful!
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Thank you I had to come out of my box to write this
not always an easy task .....Many thanks for the kind comments, they are appreciated
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Thank you Mary I am glad you enjoyed this
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That is such an awesome picture. You choose great pictures, but this one by far is my personal favorite. Ok, to the poem. Wow, this was really good. You painted pictures with your words and I especially like your word choice. This was set up nicely and I noticed there was a little rhyming in it. You followed all the rules and it came out to be a lovely poem, great job.
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this was astonishing..it kaptured me...it had me from the beggining(title)...the words left graven images in my mind...it stained my heart...thanks for sharing..and i hope to read more of yours sometime...take kare.
lots of love
maryj -
Thank you Dan, I shall take that as a compliment I am glad you enjoyed this poem, I found it pleasurable to write
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Wow, this is such a thought provoking, deep poem. I love your way with words, they really do bring poems to life. You're poems are so easy to grasp, yet have such deep, complex meaning entwined, which is what makes you so talented. You make deep meaning seem so simple and easy to understand, well done, another great poem, your fast becoming one of my favourite poets on this site.
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Thank you Angie, I appreciate your words, Many thanks
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Originality and creativity make for a good well balanced individual. Individuality is a character not to be replicated, everyone is their own person, and express it in different ways, one of the most common being poetry. XoXoXoX . With dearest love . Angie <3 .
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Thank you I am glad you enjoyed it
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over all this is great! i loved the beginging he imagry was very high quality, towards the later middle i didn't enjoy it as much, why? dont quite know. but the ending made up for it. such a beautiful conclusion. and the best way to live life.
-pixy -
Thank you It is nice when all is seen not just words Your comments are appreciated
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Actually I found myself drawn to the indepth meaning behind your words. Hope from one that escapes gives hope for all. Remarkably written.
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Thank you so much for your enthusiasum for this work, it is a deviation from my usual subject matter, but I enjoyed the diversity
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Thank you
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Excellent
Excellent as usual, cutiepie, I like the feel and taste of this poem(if you understand what I mean.) This brings forth a vivid type of darkness and the soul of the devil, and the attempt of escape as well. I see you growing as a poet and writer. I see the challenge of the new and you living up to the challenge in a great way. I like the imagery, the flow, and as always, the emotional link between writer/author and reader. I look forward to seeing yet another installment in your poetic growth, keep up the good work. -
your welcome i enjoyed your poem if i wasnt too lazy id love to read your other poems and i will sometime and for an experimented poem that was real great keep up the awesome work
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Lol, well thank you for your support for this poem, it isnt my normal type of poem but was just experimenting Many thanks for your comments
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whoa thats real deep i had no idea the devil could be that much of an ass no wonder ppl ask me why i worship him but for real i really do worship the devil n i hope i can take his place in the after life ( n if he wont give me a chance then ill just have to kill him myself to take his place n rule hell with my demon queen ) sorry that was off topic but your poem is beautiful after i read it , it makes me wonder why i worship him so much
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