There once was a mean old Colonel
who got bad marks in Jesus' journal.
He slaughtered many-a-chicken
and caused much finger-lickin'.
Now HE'S cooking somewhere infernal!
Author notes
Written September 17th, 2004
In a list
A contest entry
- Chicken Humor (Contest) by MariGoes.
300 points, ended September 20, 2004, 7 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 29 of 29
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this is so damn funny!!!! LOL!!! hey,but i looooove KFC's chicken....
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but this was a good poem....short and humorous! great work!
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oh my gosh! Is this what is known as friendly fire? LOL I'm gonna be trouble, too. I like the Colonel's fried chicken! However, I tend to not look at what those poor birds go through before they hit the dinner table.
Edited on May 07, 9:28 because ''. -
I was hoping this would be longer when I looked at the title, I'm kind of into the whole KFC Cruelty thing and I wish the Colonel would go to someplace infernal, but anyways, although I was sad because this was so short I still like it, I see it as more sad and hateful when I'm sure it was meant to be funny. Well good luck on all of your future writes.
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You are so funny Mark..great work!..thank God i don't like KFC..lol
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Oh, this is great...I too love your acronym for KFC and this poem is fantastic. I'm not really a fan of limericks, but this was wonderful. I'm still laughing 
-Emily
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ROFLMAO
Today is my day for limericks it seems... the 3rd I've read today and also the most devilishly clever. Awesome! Glad this won, it deserved it. If your a vegan, or just someone who likes seeing irresponsible imaginary characters suffer, check out my updated version of "Mary Had a Little Lamb", you won't be disappointed .
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good
How funny or truthful if your a vegaterian .well done -
Funny as all hiccups. Hilarious. Well done.
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HAHAHA!! yea you meanie colonel! lol! eventhough i love KFC myself...
a fab write, hilarious! 
take care x 
~*~ Gemz ~*~ -
I'm hungry!!!
I had chicken for dinner!!! ROFLMAO!!! Very cool, my Friend!!! Wanda
Edited on Sep 24, 1:21 because ''. -
Congratulations Mark, I loved this poem better than I like KFC. Very cleverly written.
Regards, Hugh.
Edited on Sep 20, 6:31 p.m. because ''. -
I knew this would win something!
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-laughs- Very cute.
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I like mine baked not fried. I am sure the old Colonel is baked to sheer perfection! LOL Great! Good luck!
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Hey John,
That's funny - I was trying to think of other words that start with F and "fluffy" and "fuzzy' came to mind, but I didn't use it because chickens are only fluffy when they're chicks, right? The main point was to bag on the colonel, anyway. lol
Thanks,
Mark -
This is hilarious! I loved the flow in this. I loved your acronym for KFC. That cracked me up. We have a running joke at work similar to yours. We say Killing Fluffy Chicken. It’s an inside joke that really needs to remain inside. This cracked me up.
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this tickled me. i see some truth in it, too. even if i wasn't vegetarian i would never eat at kfc simply due to the cruelty factor. i am probably alone in that but anyway...loved the poem.
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Hahaha... this is so funny Mark. I think it was done very tastefully and it certainly tickled my funny bone. Great job! Good luck in the contest!
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Nice one Mark!!!..once again....it's the simple pleasures in life: like writing a poem about a harmless old man!!!! lol!!!
Good times!!!!
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Hey, great write, very funny! The rhyming was good too! Good luck in winning the contest
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Lovely, finger licken good, you bet, my favourute fast food.................
great work
sanity
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Now that the Colonel is toast
his secret recipe's no longer a boast
11 spices and herbs
a crunch that perterbs
It extra crispy I like the most
OK it just had to be done....
Susan -
wonder how he tatses? is he being baked or broiled? perhaps in a cassertole with vegetables on the side...
Thanks for the laugh. ") -
Yeah, I guess when we are as famous and making as much dough as Stephen King, I suppose we can make up our own rules too. That is what the 'Golden Rule' is, isn't it?
~ Gennelle
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Hi G,
I thought about that but decided to add the extra S because I was reading some advice from Stephen King on writing and he said to ignore the rule and just add the S because it makes for easier reading. He was probably ignoring the rules, though. But thanks for the tip. I will scrub the S so that people don't think I'm a total dunce-o. lol
Mark
Edited on Sep 18, 1:31 because 'I edit everything'. -
Thanks Mark for making me laugh! If he killed that many chickens then he deserves to be cooking there LOL
Success in the contest and thanks for your entry!
K&L
Mari
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Mark this is great. My old neighbors once dressed up like a chicken and they went and protested at KFC when the workers there saw them they came out and threw food at them. It was just a funny thing though because after that they stopped believing in their values...I dunno, this just reminded me of it. Funny poem though!
~Destiny~
For the record, I quite like KFC... ::::runs:::: -
Bawk.
MArk, you are the man.
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Haha! Good one, Mark! Was he really as bad as that?
Ah, I can read this one.
(By the way, when a word ends in 's', there's no need to add an 's'; the possessive apostrophe just goes after the 's')
~ G
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