She had a history of killing herself
I had a habit of dying
I think she gave me something to live for
I guess I helped her pass the time
And I had a vision of seeing things straight
She had the heart of a liar
I never saw her leave me once
She never felt me beside her
She was like ice, distant and always frozen
we never came together, i wasn't for her
she'd say and push me further away
we'd never last, she explained
but for friendship, there could be no us
i was good for lying in and that was that
to keep by her when she needed a "helping hand"
we never had our mutual affections
but, i loved her still
and she only needed me , sometimes
Dixie would lay at night dreaming
and i would lay at night crying
the warmth of my hand seeking hers
and nothing was ever held tighter
than the ideas of what we could have been
she never lasted a moment
fidelity wasn't her thing
it's fair to say I'd have died for her
but, she doesn't notice
and i die a little each day
She had a history of killing herself
I had a habit of dying
I think she gave me something to live for
I guess I helped her pass the time
Author notes
what's in Italics, is by Dashboard Confessional, called, Hold On.
Written September 16th, 2004
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1 - 8 of 8
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Wow.. Yet again, I find myself a bit floored at your writing.. And I thought I could call myself a poet.. Boy, I was dead wrong. Great job. Who knows, maybe someday I'll be as captivating of an artist as you are.~willow-I'd applaud this too, but I'm all out of them. ^.^ Oh, and I love Dashboard Confessional.. I'm going to have to download this song now..
Edited on Sep 21, 5:25 p.m. because ''. -
I'm enjoying this Dixie Series and not just for the sensual side, which it is. There is something more profound going on here. Nope, fidelity wasn't her thing. The last two stanza's tell more about Dixie than all the other pieces put together....to me anyways. Looking forward to more.
Desiree -
oi... to the comments so far.
As for the poem, I thought this was a good incorporation of lyrics and particularization. I like the song, but the poem makes it real.
Stylistically, I wish you used either variable spacing or punctuation. I wouldn't suggest changing any of the words, and the phrasing struck me as good, but there was no way to anticipate the pause between lines, and I didn't feel like every pause should have the same weight. Actually, as I go back and don't read the lyrics, it is less of a problem, but the song leads people to go from one line immediately into the next. Your poem doesn't, but by reading the lyrics first, I was unsure, and didn't resolve it until I came close to the end.
A good poem. All of us who have gone through unrequited love will get it, and you maintain a critical distance to keep us from wallowing. It reads like someone confronting the simple fact of starvation.
Brian -
ya I read that!
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uh...read the auth's comments.
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then where did u get them, who wrote them?
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yah, thats nice since i didn't even write them.
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for some reason I really dig the first two stanza's,, it was great.
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