Your Glass of Milk
by Whyagain
i am nothing but a glass of milk to you
full and cold
left to warm
you leave me on the table you spoiled brat
untouched and unattended
warming and warming still
you abandon me with not even a point of comfort
neither cookies nor
pie do i have
you scurry off to your games and your friends
with not even
a thought of me
only when you left did i realize that
i am indeed
a glass of milk
still cold
still fresh
still good
i am not your glass of milk
Author notes
Thanks for the contest. This one was fun. I just love contests!
-WhyA
Written September 14th, 2004
A contest entry
- Metaphorical Perfection by Zyco.
300 points, ended September 19, 2004, 6 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
-
Marvelous metaphor! I'd like the lines about "you" the glass of milk more personal like "you leave me on the table you spoiled brat" could be "left on the table by a spoiled brat" or "left on the table, you spoiled brat" and "you abandon me with not even a point of comfort" could be "abandoned with not even a point of comfort."
I really enjoyed this. Refreshing, like a cool glass of moo juice, heehee. -
Thank you for that; and you were right.
-WhyA -
hmm...nicely done. Excellent ending. Only suggestion I have is to change "though" to "Thought" in line 12. I believe this is what you meant to put, but if I'm wrong, than that's cool too.
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