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I'm Glad I Didn't Kill Myself

"Goodbye.
I don't know why I carry on
The future looks as empty as the past
And the past holds nothing but sorrow and deception..."

But I'm glad I didn't kill myself.
The last seven years have been full of discovery.
There are people I like.
There are people I love.
There are places I go.
I am happy.

"I can't talk to you. I don't 'talk' to anyone.
I don't say what I mean or how I'm feeling..."

But I'm glad I didn't kill myself
because people do care and people do listen
And if I don't talk now, it's because I don't want to.
I am happy.

"I want to tell you. I need to tell someone.
But I feel so insecure.
I want you to like me. I want to be loved.
But who would love me?..."

But I'm glad I didn't kill myself
because many people like me,
some people fell in love with me
and a thousand people laughed with me.
They made me happy.

"I don't want to go on anymore.
I am a loser. Born to lose.
I will never win,
so I might as well give up."

But I'm glad I didn't kill myself.
I'm glad I dared to be different.
I'm glad I dared to be myself.

Author notes

I personally find this quite schmaltzy, but it was important for me to write. The words in quotation marks come from a note I wrote as a suicidal teen. I'm reposting this because I've really had a sense this week of being glad to be alive.
Written September 6th, 2004

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Comments


  • catz Moderators member
    September 7, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    This is one of the most heart warming poems I've read....I'm glad you didn't kill yourself... you have so much to love, so much to offer, so much to live for I read another poem today pertaining to this subject, that I wish all the troubled teenagers and even other people could read. You might like it, too. www.allpoetry.com/poem/799096 I hope you'll check it out.

    Hooray for you!!!!! Can I say it again...I'm glad you didn't kill yourself

    Dee
    Edited on Sep 07, 7:44 p.m. because ''.

  • Mia Donna
    September 6, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    Oh this poem is so amazing!! I'm glad that you realized life isn't so bad! Oh some day there will be a perfect contest for you somewhere...Like poems or stories about suicidal teens deciding against suicide...But this is a great poem, it really is!