O'fellow poet-
You were in church with me today;
Yes, you.
I ached with your presence-
smelled the brew of isolation but
you were there.
Our elbows hardly touched but
I held you in my arms
when the words described your heart.
They sang forgiveness, and we
traded invisible smiles;
They prayed faith and your acidic bite bled
this tongue-
my tears anxious to oil your dormant pain.
When praise raised the roof,
your reluctant will gave way-
weighty pride of intellect let go;
We floated up, up
and above;
and in this fellowship,
your need met mine with a holy kiss.
Your mind drew their stares as they
blessed your loneliness; saw glassy eyes
spill the years, the lamentation-
all the resistance, the reasons,
smoldered by the lowering of wetted lids,
brows knitting in the urge to surrender.
No verbal words could express this release
into a paranormal space of joy
I watched you being rocked, lulled, understood.
Guard down,
dam broke-
the silent healing gush of waters
swirled round our knees
when you met My Lord-
unafraid to say you know Him.
Thank you for standing in the river with me-
for the poetry that invited you here.
Me, with a new ear,
and eye,
You are so very Loved.
Author notes
This will take on many interpretations; those that receive this know where they were that day..and would have been...as we heard the anointed words at a sinner's hospital--- the church.
Written September 6th, 2004
In a list
What did you think
Comments
1 - 36 of 36
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This is an awesome write and I was enthralled with each word. You are truly a great writter. You have been HOODWINKED!
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I remembered this and wanted to visit, to read again, to feel what I felt when I first read it; when it was burned into my memory (not the words, but the images, the emotions) and tell you that for some reason, this touches me, transports me to a different place and time.
Again, I applaud. -
Your poems are always so insightful.
There are still a lot of us floating around looking for the right anchor to tie us to something that matters.
Unfortunately that one thing that matters seems to be different for all of us. Some need help finding it, others need to figure it out for themselves.
Others still, don’t even know it’s time to look, but some are already on the trail, working through the garbage of life trying to make sense of it all.
We'll see...
Good work..
Pat -
Brilliantly divine
My dearest Friend Dianne -
I am blessed to have met you ... You are the manifestation of the True and Divine converging of reason and emotion in spiritual growth. Thank you for this poem ... it is absolutely brilliant in its compassion and forgiveness ... I love you!
Please go and read my poem Absent in Presence:
It is about the Moment of Creation before Just Before Time: the Great Climax
The Divine Sperm
the Beginning of All Pure Passion
God's Climatic Idea.
The Formation of Predestined You ... Me ... Us
How do I say what I feel and see?
My words have not yet begin to breathe itself ...
I can see almost the entire Plan --- I am almost Home --- Just another short Eternity ...
Agapé, always,
Myra
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simply go to EDIT...then it will give you that option. Let me know if you have any problem
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I don't know how to delete A comment
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Since I copied and pasted this piece for editing, could you please delete it from this page? It's heavying up my uploading. Thanks. You're very interesting.
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lol, sorry about that, it's on my author page under the name "All Grown Up" thank you alot
. -scott-
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Oh, my dear. Thank you for reading my work. I must say, however, that I'll always be glad to critique, but please next time..lol. leave this separate from a comment. I am placing it in my documents and will read it and then send you an IM for it! Ok? Thanks for trusting me. Warmly, CookieZeal
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Wow this was a really awesome poem, I loved every word and it wasn't hard to picture what was going on in my mind, very vivid.
Edited on Sep 12, 3:12 p.m. because 'tooo big'. -
This is a very well-written montage to those who you have cared for and whom cared for you. I thought it was miraculously well-written without using pretty and obscure words that most people have to look up in a dictionary (me included half the time). Loved it.
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while i could appreciate the idea the poem presented, i just couldnt get into it. suppose im too dark. anyways, it is well written, i liked your imagery, and i think i understand what you were trying to say. love appears in so many ways, and in so mamy forms, eh?
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Good write
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this is amazing...completely amazing..
i loved that..im ging to re-read it...must applaud. check me out sometime. anyonita.
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Oh my! Sweet Surrender!! This is magnificent!! Just stunningly beautiful.
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This is such a beautiful write, in my opinion it's about the fact that we collectively worship, despite our churches being separated by sea/even time. I may be wrong, but that's my interpretation. Keep writing, this was beautiful
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Hi Cookie...I read this again, just as I promised....and after talking with you about what you had experienced as you wrote it, I could see it unfolding in your poem. Your style is certainly different from mine, which makes it difficult for me to feel comfortable critiquing how you write; Im just so happy that our Father doesnt wrap all of His presents in the same paper, but gives us each a different voice with which to praise Him. I find your poem and style very interesting...and I dont think I could mimic it in a thousand years, so you are definately one in a million. Love ya...sans
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I needed to read this again. It is too good not to.
Once again, I applaud... at least mentally...
Edited on Sep 07, 9:17 p.m. because ''. -
It is always hard for one to rise oneself up, that is why there will always be a need for other people or beliefs. Man seems to lack the power to believe in himself and that is what always ends up taking him down the wrong road to destruction. Whether in a mental, physical, emotional or spirital way. A single phrase that says so much and yet seems so misunderstood.
Peace be still and know that I am God... \
Hugs...Eddy -
This is absolutely beautiful, its been a long time since I have seen a transformation like this. Sad as that is, you said it beautiful, the act of submission is a powerful one. Great write Cookie.
Red -
WOW
This is amazing cookie... I am at a lost for words... You have moved my soul in a way that hasn't happened in over a year... Great poem... -
I'm not at all faithful to anything. I appreciate all points of view equally though. I'm a writer above anything. So for this, as a poem, I would give this good marks. The wording is good, I wouldn't call it imaginative, because it speaks of things that are actually real for you. I'm not much for the real world either, fantasy is my playground. It's nice to see that someone can let themselves go like this, others are too embarrassed about what they believe to do anything about it. I applaud you.
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good write. xxx
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wonderful
the sinner's hospital? I like that term. very imaginative.
but not all saints are sinners and not all sinners are saints.
by the way we live our lives is how our light shall be judged and not by the tag on our faiths.
blessed be.
excellent write -
a true benevalance in your surrender of His abiding love, grace and fellowship.
held throught the light of invisible form I find within the comfort and forgivness He greets us all with in eternal blessing.
this has to be the most sacred thing you've written in His presence and you will bless many in this form.
Tamara
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Happy! Happy! Happy!
this just made me feel all happy Nothing is better than standing in the river yippee!! just the thought makes me want to shout! lol o.k im o.k now. this was such a wonderful, uplifting and hopeful piece I hope many more will come to know the lord and may his light continue to shine through you I loved this!!
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a very nice endearing piece indeed full of consolment as well as love
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Slowly but surely, I am regaining what was lost so long ago. You are one of the reasons why this is so. And I think you! By the way, this is a beautiful piece. But then again, what else would I expect from you?
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Ohhhhh you've well expressed, and am so very GLAD you received something from this one. I must admit..I nearly saw you walk byy........in that moment of worship. Bless you, Warmly, CookieZeal
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i loved this piece tremendously, i get from it just a complete sense of loving, caring, and understanding. idont know it makes me feel the love that you must have for the lord and idk you described everything soo beautifully...i truly cannot even tell you how moved i am by this piece.
take care,
Michael -
This is the best I have read in a while. I am superbly impressed.
Applauding seems so shallow in its wake. -
superb...I have no faith whatsoever but managed to be moved by yours, a truly wonderful piece of poetry, thank you
Victoria xxXxx
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this was very good write i enojyed reading it very much and i thought you done a amazing job keep the good work up !
pendragon -
(I'll redo my comment)
Cookie this spoke of the love of those being touched by God and you seeing it...Beautiful piece nicely done. Sherry -
I'm not quite sure if I've read such eloquence in the past with the theme of a Sanctuary giving praise to one gone. Quite the piece here that you've written.
How easy would it be for someone to merely say, "we cried..." and put a clear cut spin on the emotions. The words you use to convey the emotion to us were fantastic with the imagery and went above what I could have expected as far as word choice to bring the picture of all of this to us.
Such a nice piece.
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Wow. This is incredible. You described this emotion towards a person so innocently. It shows how people are brought together by words. I cant even express how much I enjoyed this poem. You should promote it because it deserves some attention. Great job!
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