Clouded sun
I frighten you away
with the words I've said
Or the deeds of my day
As I walk down the street
Shadows turn on a heel
Fly as far as they can
I know how they feel
Dragging down the sidewalk
I hit all the cracks
Passing perfect people
With perfect pink backpacks
There heads held high
And shadows going their way
Minds on the future
No thoughts of yesterday
Clouded sun
Please uncloud for me
Or shall I just turn around
And let what will be
be
Author notes
777
thank you so much for this topic, i love it
(and uncloud isnt a word but i put it in there any way)
Written August 27th, 2004
A contest entry
- Contest of Enigma,Inquiries,and Humor! by nOva-.
300 points, ended September 5, 2004, 7 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Thanx for your comment on my piece... it was nice of you... I like your piece here... nobody's perfect... but it hurts to know your own flaws... what will be will be and the sun will become unclouded and shine for you again... good job.
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excellent
length and impact, perfect!
do not we all ask this sometime ? ...
great rhythm and meaning
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*hums twilight zone theme* this could be a great plot for the show if it was develpoed abit. i liked it specially teh background was a nice touch
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Great write. You want your day to be unclouded. I understand we all have our bad days. Sometimes we also have our good days so look up don't give up.
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Thank you very much, it realy wasnt about me it was just what i got from the contest option.
-pixy -
Great write. You want your day to be unclouded. I understand we all have our bad days. Sometimes we also have our good days so look up don't give up.
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hey this is awesome!really origin really great!vivd write!thanks 4 entering s very muc*smiley*
Edited on Aug 27, 7:40 p.m. because '4everjustbcuz'.
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