If we surrender to the pain,
allow ourselves to feel it,
completely,
with no distractions,
there are two possibilities -
We will overcome it
or it will overcome us.
Fearing both,
most merely survive
between these two prospects.
Like the nursery rhyme
about the little boy
who keeps the dike from bursting
by plugging it with his thumb,
we can remain paralyzed
forever
or trust the flood
to carry us
to a safe, new shore.
Author notes
For my friend, Aeolian Song, in response to his poem "Sorrow".
Written August 27th, 2004
In a list
What did you think
Comments
1 - 18 of 18
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great point ... odd that I choose this to read today.. when I need to be distracted from emotional pain.
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Excellent!
See now this is where I teter, so right, I also must go on, true words of wisdom Mark, I needed to hear this right now. Too easy to get wrapped up in all the despair. In fact just decided NO MORE TV NEWS! I will selectively read it in the paper. Thanks! Great write! -
I have added the link, thank you.
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Hi Criss,
Sorry to hear you've been having so many physical problems. I hope you're 100% again soon.
Re. honesty in writing, I think the world rewards that richly, because so many writers are self-conscious and fearful about what others will think of them. By telling your story, you become a spokesperson for all the people who are afraid to tell them, or who just can't find the words. I also think it's very therapeutic, as you learned during the school project you mentioned. Anyway, you'll know if and when you're ready. There is a time for forgetting too, or to just refill the well.
You can add links to my work anywhere you like. I'd be honored. Thanks.
I hope to meet you at the dojo someday!
Take care,
Mark -
p.s. okay so it is more than 20 pages
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Mark--
First, sorry for my delay in responding, I have been really ill the past six months or so, and had minor surgery on Monday, still trying to get back into the routine of getting up in the mornings! lol
I have thought about writing a book, but I am not sure that I am cut out for it to be truthful. I'm not sure that I would ever really want to claim some of my pain as my own, an autobiography would be like painting a picture for everyone to see, but I have wanted to write a fiction type book with my own experience. But somehow I can just not get the ideas together collectively. I actually do have a 20 page account of my life until I was 19 years old. I took a Child Development class in college and that is what she had us write for our final paper instead of an exam. Believe me, it was an eye opening experience, and HARD. The oral presentation was most difficult, but it wasnt that bad since everyone in the class did it. We become closer friends for it too. I should get it out and add to it, just for the sake of it. But it has most of the bad stuff and no really good memories.
Now I am just rambling. It is very strange how our writes mirror one another, would you be okay with me adding the link to yours in my authors comments?
Criss -
Criss,
First of all, thank you for sharing your story with me. You sure have had more than your share of pain already, too much. I can understand how you became so angry. Nobody would blame you. But considering all you've survived, the fact that you are doing so well now is that much more impressive. I wish none of it would have happened, of course, but you are a true inspiration. In fact, I think you should think about writing a book about all you've survived. Your story could help millions. Please think about it. I'm editing my father's autobiography right now and have some experience in that arena, so I'd be happy to collaborate with you on it.
It is strange how our two writes seem to mirror each other, and especially when you used the exact words in your previous comment. That freaked me out a little. lol But maybe it's God or the universe's way of saying we made it. I've had my share of traumas, too. It's nice to know another survivor. You sound like a remarkable woman and I look forward to getting to know you better and reading your work here. Thanks again for telling me your story. I won't forget it.
Peace,
Mark
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full of truth
This is very well written. It is something that I could imagine myself writing.
I have learned this very lesson, through trail and error. The first trail being when my dad left me. I was about 8 years old and he just walked out. He told me that he loved me and that he would always be around, but he wasnt. That was the first, real pain that I ever felt. It was the sinking deep pain that consumes you, a struggle no eight year old child should ever have to deal with. But with the strength of my mother, through the years, the pain slowly stopped hurting. Then when I was about 15 years old is when the real test came, that is when I let the pain overcome me completely, and today, I stand firmly at forgivness, but not forgetting the hell he put me through or how long it took me to reach solid ground.
I was raped when I was 17. The outcome of that, was a child. A beautiful little girl. She was the tool to overcoming the pain of betrayal, hurt and agony that my attacker had put me through. When I was 19 years old, my daughter died. She had a disease that took over her body and left her open to infection. Seven months later, the man that I had been dating, left me. He left with no reason, no word, no goodbye, just left. (That is what my poem, "Surrender To The Pain", is about.) In the following two years, I have been angry, I have had pain, I have hated the world and several other emotions, but in the end, your poem describes exactly what I had to do... give in, let it consume me, allow the pain to completely penitrate my heart and then make the choice, either ramain we can remain in a paralyzed state forever or trust the flood to carry me to a safe new shore, I surrendered the the pain, the the waters and let them have me completely, and they left me at a place, where I have begun to fill happiness again.
Sorry for the rambling. I just thought you should know your peom had a great impact on me, I just wrote what came to my mind. I understand the words to this poem, to their deepest meaning. I think you and I were on the same wave length here because what we wrote about, almost mirror one another.
This is a great write, full of real words and real choices.
Criss
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Hi Mark,
How have you been doing? This is a remarkable write, very wise in what you have said here, almost like those old quotes. The two possibilities are all that are to handle any situation. So much of truth in your words. I have posted one of my old writes today, check iy out when you find time.
Lencio -
Mark, I would have to say that this is one hell of a profound write my friend. Here I was gearing up for a lengthy write and when I got to the end I refreshed my browser because I thought it cut it off somehow.
But seriously, this is a keeper for sure. That last stanza took raised the bar my friend!
~ John
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I like the directness of this jewel of wisdom... perhaps unshared, but I wish it was infused with a little more sense of urgency that it speaks so well of... maybe it's just me; artistic choices, ya know?
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Wow, this is a very wise write. Not to mention it has a lot of truth behind it. It says exactly what we all need to realize in life. Good job, thanks for the read n good luck in the contest!
Crystal -
This poem spoke yeons of wisdom - even between the lines. Everything in life is a choice.. every trial.and how we choose to deal with them. There's a lesson to be learned from each and every circumstance and we have the power to learn and grow from it, or to let it destroy us. Its a simple choice. You've captured that well with this one!
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Wise
Mark, I love your poem, you set forth your idea very clearly and with great illustration. In the flood we are overcome by the pain, and then we overcome it. Defeat is temporary.
Good luck in the contest!
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You could never talk too much, Mariza. Thanks for meditating on the message in this one. I think it's one of the bigger ones I've learned.
I hope you had a nice weekend!
Mark -
Hey AS,
You're very welcome. Actually, I wrote that poem a long time ago. Your poem just reminded me of it. Truth be told, I like your version of this realization better. I tend to favor long poems and stories that get down to the real nitty gritty of things, as yours did.
I appreciate your respect for the technical aspects of poetry. I tend to write from the hip but I'm always aware of how much there is to learn, as with any art. As far as knowing which way to take it, I think that is something that needs to be left to your instinct as a writer. If you're like me, you know when it's exactly what you set out to say and when it isn't. The length is never really a consideration for me. I write till the feeling is released completely and/or the picture is drawn, which I think is what you did with Sorrow. That's how it felt, anyway. Very thorough and satisfying, no holds barred.
Thanks,
Mark
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Very succinct paraphrase of a very long poem.
Yes, writing "sorrow" was cathartic to that healing process. Although it was one poem for one specific grief (beef), many other griefs were subsequently revealed and faced as I wrote that poem. It's such a challenge to know which way to take it. Write free-verse from the heart un-altered and straight, like "sorrow"? Or, refine the feelings of the heart and experiences into delicately crafted pieces of writing, like "The Lotus Tree"? How does one know which way to take it?
At the time I wrote "sorrow", it was free-write. At the time I wrote "The Lotus Tree", it was form. The challenge for me is learning to know which method an experience and/or emotion deserves. This, more than anything else, will be my greatest challenge as a developing and evolving writer of poems.
Thanks for this. I'm feeling honored.
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Very wise words! We have two choices: run and take the risk to be caught by the beast or stay and take the risk to be eaten by the beast. Taking the first choice; we might run for the rest of our life to avoid the flood. On the second choice we still can fight the beast, win and let the flood carry us to a better place. Nothing is easy in life, specially when we have to deal with sorrow, but not to face it makes everything even worse.
Oh geeze, I'm talking too much...
Hugs,
Mari
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