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Let Me See Another Day (Shakespearean Sonnet)

Missing image
by Gregg Rowe

To convince myself --  a mortal am I:
I add the days up in seconds of time
My heartbeats counted, I let out a sigh;
An old man I feel -- yet still in my prime

My temple abused, I kneel ev’ry day
My angels I ask -- another sun to see
To be tucked in -- by mother moon, I pray;
Let me live on some borrowed time I plea

My life is too short, I should not complain
The time’s now -- I should converse with my muse
Reconnect with my spirit – use my brain
Record my life’s rainbows and coloured hues

Give me another day is all I ask,
So I can peel off layers of my mask.



Author notes

I have read and understood the rulesfor this contest.  Gregg
Written August 19th, 2004

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Comments

1 - 18 of 18

  • Twisted Fairy
    January 29, 2006
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    I particulary enjoyed how you ended this poem. It was simple and sweet. I found this poem to be a tad whimsical. It kind of reminds me of the song "One Song Glory" from Rent.

    Beautiful job, thank you for entering the contest.

  • Little Poet14
    November 19, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    Give me another day is all I ask,
    So I can peel off layers of my mask.

    That was my favorite part!!
    Good luck in this contest!!!!!!! I am gonna enter a poem.... i need to hurry and write one!! this one definatly was a great one!!


    Alwayz,

    Little Poet14

  • LostParamour
    August 20, 2004
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    Thanks for entering my contest... Good luck!!! I'll make meaningful comments when I judge the poems... I'm just thanking everybody for entering...


  • hugh wyles silver member
    August 19, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    Dear Gregg,
    I have emailed my comments, which you requested, on this poem.
    There may be points with which you disagree or don't understand. Please come back to me if so and I will explain.
    This is a very good poem in which most lines have four iambic feet. A sonnet requires five iambic feet per line.
    Regards, Hugh.


  • August 19, 2004
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    THis is very good!!! Better than most of the things I read on here all the time!!!
    ~Sar~


  • Danneh
    August 19, 2004
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    wow this is a very meaningfull poem that has really touched my soul God Bless you from D the purple spotted orange monkey


  • velveteen
    August 19, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    Great job. You made the reader feel your pain. You've done an excellent job with this one. Really enjoyable! Keep up the great work!
    God bless you,
    ~~~~~ Crosseyed387 ~~~~~


  • Vampress
    August 19, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    I only wish I were as strong as you, Gregg. Even with all you've been through, you still press on, wanting to live. For me, at times I wish I'd just die, that no one cares about me. I only wish this wasn't your fate, if only I could help in some shape. All I can say is even though I am very young, if you ever need someone to talk to I am here. People say I'm a great listener.
    Michelle

  • lachicamontanas
    August 19, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    I enjoyed this... the strength is in the message - to live life to the point at which you realize you need more time to, as you say, peel off layers of your mask. I thought the second stanza was interesting in that you mention praying (to a Christian God I assume) and then you reference Mother Moon - which to me would be a pagan reference. This is of no consequence, just interesting. I think that I was expecting more eloquent language - not eloquent necessarily, but more "Shakespearian", I guess. It was tricky for me to read and feel it in iambic pentameter when the language was so different than that of Shakespeare. I hope this makes sense. I did enjoy it... thank you!


  • Nobody126
    August 19, 2004
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    very nice

    This is very beautiful...like "the madman" by Khalil Jibran...every day we scratch the old mask to fix up a new one...very nice thought....


  • August 19, 2004
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    smiling, gregg, life is life poetry slips in the drool in the corners of our mouths and rides the waves of longing. i love your poetry in all the guises i read it in


  • Dean
    August 19, 2004
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    I love this. It left me wounded, but gifted by the poem. It was obviousely purposefull and meant something to you, thats evident in the clear direction of the words. But the strangely elegant way you conveyed your message was touching.


  • cc
    August 19, 2004
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    short but very likeable.smooth reading and nice rhyming


  • sock monkey
    August 19, 2004
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    Very nice, very profound. The last line is so cool. Lovely.


  • TearsInElysia
    August 19, 2004
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    great

    Very nice! i am not usually a fan of shakespearean sonnets but i really like this! and i agree the end if really good because it opens up a new aspect to the poem. bravo!


  • August 19, 2004
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    Awesome :)

    This is a wonderful sonnet. It is.... I can't think of the word it's that good. lol. Love the ending it closed this sonnet quite nicely. Awesome write. Mucho love peace and
    *~Oleander Dragon~* (Bindy)


  • lisargh
    August 19, 2004
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    bless you Greg, I admire so much your strength and your wonderful spirit, I wish you peace within yourself and contentment and many more writes to come ,
    hugs
    lisa


  • Soft rayne
    August 19, 2004
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    good

    inetresting poem....I love sonnets, so this is very cool...the couplet was a good ending as well....nice poem!

1 - 18 of 18