Hello! time for a reality check
Wake up girl, your life's a wreck!
you've been dreaming way too long
And then you wonder what went wrong
get a grip and face your fears
stop useless dreaming and wasting years
Look around at what you see
the cold hard truth of reality
No one is going to stand by your side
No one sees the silent tears you cry
Stop all this whining no one gives a damn
you're an idiot for ever trusting a man
unworthy of ever knowing any love
You're just a loser when push comes to shove
oh how you're looking so tired and worn down
How your face always seems to have a frown
give me a break, there is no sympathy here
I don't even love you, so why should I care?
Just leave me alone and please leave me be
You stupid bitch stop looking at me!
you're making me sick just looking at you
I hate you for every single wrong thing you do
I loathe the way you always start to cry
The way you sniffle and carry on about why
You're so pathetic, I can't believe you're me
This sad reflection in the mirror I see
Author notes
choice is hate
okay guys seriously im o.k I felt this way at the time it was written but I do not anymore! I was just having one of those moments in my life where I felt everything crashing down around me and I was loosing grip! all I can say is it is a good thing God thought otherwise of me
Written August 17th, 2004
In a list
A contest entry
- I am Broken by FreeFalling911.
800 points, ended May 14, 57 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - The Passions of the Heart (Hate, Envy, and Jealousy contest) by MYsecondchance.
1100 points, ended June 27, 28 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 66 of 66
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wow
i can totally relate to this, i feel like that right now and for a while acually. who CAN trust a man you're right. i could feel youre pain and mine as i read this. well done.
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This is really good and the way it flows together is great.Everyone can basically relate to this because everyone feels this way at least once in their lives and because of that this is something good to write about.I wish you the best of luck.Take care
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This is really amazing.... I love the ending... it took me by suprise.
good luck!
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this is a fantastic poem and a great ending,
i think everyone can relate to it.
its a great story and beautifully written,
it flows naturally and the rhyming is impeccable, well done!
and thank you for a great write
alex -
This poem was really wicked!! it was fantastic thank you and best wishes
Ballie xoxox -
ho;y shit thats alot of aplauds nice work
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lol your secret is safe as long as no one reads your comment
thanks for the comment hun, Im glad you liked it. Im a rhymaholic ohhh and a hugaholic too so here lol 
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that is such an awesome poem. i can totally relate. it is so good im going to book mark it (shh...dont tell neone!) lol! well thanks for entering my contest and good luck! this was so great! keep it up!
MisJudged -
Nicely Done
This is an aweseom write. I like the emotions behind it all; And more so I like the fact I can relate to it.. So, Really great job.
Frances Lynn
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that was an amazing ending!
I absolutly love this poem
Thanks for entering my contest
Keep up the great work
~no1special~ -
i do felt that way sometimes..
and most of my poems really are about me.. and what i feel..
i love this one.. great write -
Good
You know... I don't think I've read a single bad poem by you! Good luck in the contest. -
woo!¬ awesome wrhyming! way to vent that anger and your dam right
anmazing stuff!
Thanks 4 the angry entry
Twilight -
awwww.... nice job. its so sad and angry... nice. congratultaions on your trophy. Nice work.
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this is great! thanks for enterin!
tomie- -
Excellent!
Wow! Shockingly sinic! Artistic! Dark! Deep! WOW! And Ouch! -
WOW...thats really powerful...I wrote something very similiar to it....for a long time I despised myself so I can relate to this very well...there is very raw emotion in this piece...I enjoyed the deeper look at you as a person...always know that here is someone out there that is worth you time...and those who are not you should let fall to the wayside and know that you are worth more than they will ever see...great job
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Yes I read and commented on this.. great write nice to read again. ~~Shannon~~
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excellent!
We often feel hate for ourselves after a very bad experience. The thing is notr to stay mad, but to learn from these.
Well spoken and from a depth inside yourself.
This shows that you still have demons to face and defete to continue with your life. Fight them and heal!
Well spoken piece! -
fuck! that was really good at first i thought u was talking about some one else and then i was thinking because i was just randomly picking names that u may have been a guy and saying u hated this gurl or watever but i was like no it cant be and then boom right at the end it says You're so pathetic,
"I can't believe you're me
This sad reflection in the mirror I see" that was really fucking good keep up the work!! you have some great talent...and i really enjoied reading this poem!!! goodjob once again!! i really liked this one!!!
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Holy shit, that was unbelievably good, seriously. Writing from that point of view, the passion you expressed, I'm speechless. I know all too well what you're gettin at sweetie, I only wished I had the skills to get it out. Maybe someday. Keep writing, you're wonderful and an inspiration!
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Holy hell. I loved this poem. It flowed so very nicely, and the message was really heartfelt. I love how you said everything! Thank you so much for entering my contest!
-Esmael -
Well, darn darling, you are such a sweetheart, and you always are there for me when I need a friend...It's kinda hard for me to understand why you would feel this way, heck, you're allowed to whine, I sure hope so, because I sure do enough for the both of us as of late, all ya see, or hear is
I love ya just the way you are, again, wonderfully expressed, and thanks for sharing, and much love always! 
& many 's for your sweet soul!
-Timothy The Poetic Weaver~
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very emotional, full on anger and spite and meaness. i have read and wrote poems about hating someone (though none are on this site yet) and i have never written one like yours...my hatred can never be fealt and this poem made me feel it. i especially like how you say:
I loathe the way you always start to cry
The way you sniffle and carry on about why
You're so pathetic, I can't believe you're me
This sad reflection in the mirror I see
It is so powerful and gets the message across. i also like how you say that no one cares for your whining. it really is an amazing poem.
Great Job!
~Ash~
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I understand this all too well.... it took years for me even to like myself...let alone love myself....I was so afraid of hurting people with my anger....that I shut everyone out...it wasn't until certain friends started helping me to see the light at the end tunnel... that I learned to forgive myself.and through that time I learned to forgive others. that's when for me nature smiled at me & opened up her arms... it's then when I found peace. I hope someday you'll be able to find the same peace within your life. but remember this... I'm there for when you need me.
BIll
Edited on Aug 19, 1:01 p.m. because ''. -
Oh sweetie I wish you didnt hate yourself so much. Things will get better for you. You are a great person so just remember there is a lot of love for you here. Sorry I didnt call last night I promise I will tonight I had some bad things going on there. ~~Shannon~~
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Thank you for the kind coments on my work. I was having a self hate moment but Im o.k now see lol anyways you are so right about love being blameless
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Breath-taking
Heay, don't hate your self that much,please. You don't expect perfection, out of you, do you? None is perfect, only the immortal spirit up there. Him alone is, so why hate yourself?
You shouldn't even hate yourself for loving. Hate the individual for breaking your heart and pass no blame to love, for it's blameless.
A good,sincere write about you Poet. Good flow and nice rhymes! You've always written nothing out of excellent. Your poems are just simply great! -
WOW
OMG. wow. i really love this poem. you hit how i feel directly on the nose. I really enjoyed reading it and it was a great poem. you have great talent please keep up the great work. ^.^ good bye.
-christen
Edited on Aug 18, 8:05 p.m. because 'i just thought of more to add'. -
you've been dreaming way too long
And then you wonder what went wrong
this right here is what i feel so many times I love this poem the interal scream at yourself, it was great good work -
Good
Holy Shizzle <_< Buaha. Great Poemmmm...Yeah My Reflection is Reatardeddd..And Scary.. Buahah Yeah. Great Poem
Nice Flow. Keep Up The Good Work
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although im a little insulted by ur stupid for ever trusting a man line it was an incredible write haha. i couldnt find anything wrong with it. great job
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I haven't read any of your poems before, and I think this was a great first impression! The rhyming in this was excellent...none of it was forced at all. It's weird how when you look in the mirror you notice things that no one else can see. Great write!
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Excellent. Well written
awww im sorry.men are stupid.gives you a i hope you feel better sweetie i know how you feel.awesome poem you put together.ranting is always good.get it all out of your system.it flowed fantastically.excellent piece.i applaud you for this.keep up the awesome work.hope to hear more from you soon.
<3 -alicenwondrland-
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Sad but powerful write
You shouldn't be so hard on yourself, we all make mistakes and we learn and grow from them. There are good men in this world, it's just a matter of finding them which is almost always like looking for a needle in a haystack. Goodluck dear and be true to yourself. You are a human being cable of love. Take care now. Avril
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Oh My Word, it is a good thing you let me know of the anger you hold, now I know not to ever harm you!!! Really, this is depressing and yet truthful, I need to go and do this. I will in dedication to you. Great write since it is all about you, yet I see more than this!!!
Take care,
Buki
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thank you for not judging and your kind coment was much apreciated. God bless hun
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The mirror can be so intimidating. It's like the video camera or the recorder. It shows us who other people see and it doesn't match the image in our head. Great poem! Sad, because we are usually our worse critic, but it is honest. I can sure relate.
Keith -
Not crap, Lena, but having the courage to face the mirror and that moment of reflection - all part of the process of grief. You had to write this; to see the picture...now you can move on. And...never judge yourself by a man - just be YOU! I wish you light and a safe "journey" to tomorrow...take care!
Nicolette
Edited on Aug 18, 2:14 p.m. because ''. -
I have not read your poetry before, but I know that you must have been only looking at the ONE side of the mirror. You forgot the other side. The mirror has two sides....you must have closed one eye, or covered up half....or something.
PS thanks for reading and commenting on my poem Flower !!
We can't run just look at the ugly US in the mirror. Please take a look at my poem....it shows both sides of the mirror. You too, have both sides!!
allpoetry.com/Poem/653976 have a read.
Cheryl
Edited on Aug 18, 12:52 because ''. -
I think sometimes we can sink ourselves right into things, relationships, whatever, hide there so to speak, and not look at ourselves, sometimes it takes a break up or whatever for us to look honestly at how we really feel about ourselves.
I understand completly where you are coming from with this, but you have donw a brave thing by admiting these feelings, not all man are untrustworthy, sometimes we just seem to pick people that will fulfill out theories that we have made of the world... the best thing you could do right now, is work on yourself completly, therapy, self help books any way possible, to find yourself and find love for yourself,this is the beginning of your journey back to yourself. Tread carefully and be very gentle to yourself, i m me if you ever need a chat.
i am so sorry things feel this bad for you right now, but the only way is up from here...
take care hunny
lisa xxx -
Thank you for reading and your coments, you are right I have learned it well, but you are also right when you say it's time to break that mirror of distortion which is exactly what I plan on doing. Today I woke up in shock at this that I had written the night before and realised I am so much better than this and its time for me to pick myself up and move forward in life alltogether, stronger, only I can change my self perseption and I spent to long trying to find a person to do it for me.
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It's such a truthful reflection of how others have treated you and you learned it well. The men in your life were self-haters also. Time to break that carnival mirror of distortion.
The poem is well written and I would like to point out improvements but alas, cannot. It doesn't flow but instead floods with intense feelings. I'll read it again to make sure I am giving the "deep critique" we joined for.
Tecohe -
Also, I wish you luck with whatever you need to do to have some more self confidence. Sometimes when we look deep within...it's not pretty, so in a way I know how you feel with this. Remember that God is with you and He thinks you are beautiful no matter what. Remember, He created you! And He loves you so much. And I think you're a beautiful person as well. You are! God bless and good luck.
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OH MY CRAP. This is so depressing. WOW. I was so surprised to see something like this written by you. It's just filled with emotion though, and it's so incredibly deep. I was so surprised at the end when you said it was about yourself...sheesh. But you are not a bitch, so don't worry about it. Wow, this was a good poem, but sheesh...so depressing. Wow! Remember though, not all men are stupid...I've found a few that are worthwhile. But yes, most are dumb, lol. Wow, this is so personal. Good job.
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Aw, purple nurple I hope you feel better having vented some of these feelings. I know that it always helps me. YOu are a wonderful person with the biggest heart I've seen. You do deserve great love, you have so much love to give. Times of hurt are always our most trying, but something ending is not a failure. I know that's cliche....but it's true. Even when a relationship ends, we have the good times of that relationship to be grateful for...even if it hurts that we no longer have it. I have no doubt you will carry on even stronger and find that love that fits you best, and doesn't end. Take care, sweetie!
Jenn -
god damn! i am glad i am not the one you hate like this. You are a beautiful woman through and through. a gem in my life and a insperation to us al. It is easier beliving the bad stuff though isn't it? I know I deal with it everyday of my life. I love you dearly...and I hope you get through this time in your life
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Lena, ok. now you have that set of emotions penned and out the way. always remember. 'today is the first day of the rest of your life'
It will be what you make it.
Don't go looking into the past for answers, just learn by the experiences.
Yo have a constant in your life of your wonderful children.. take heart, they will always be there for you.
They love you unconditionally.
This is a new day. make the best of it to however you can.and stay strong, you have a whole life ahead of you and no time to dwell on the sadnesses of the past.
Love you hun.
Ann
Edited on Aug 18, 3:31 because 'gremlins in the keyboard'. -
well now go to bed and put this day behind you. Then when you get up in the morning, do as you told Bill you would. Pull yourself up and start over. Go spend time with those beautiful children and let them help you heal.
God Bless,
Susan -
You know your coment was just what I needed at this very moment and I thank God for bringing you to this write so I could hear what you have to say. I thank you my friend and there is so much truth in what you have written in response to this. Just having a really bad day as tomarrow I am sure will be better. After all I get to start all over
Edited on Aug 18, 1:01 because ''. -
thank you very much I will make the nessasary changes it is much apreciated. thanks for reading
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Sad
Hi Lena:
You should never judge a book by its cover. Disappointment is always filled with remorse. What did I do or what did I say. The time of reconing may come someday, but today is not that day. You had something and still have something that cannot be covered up with words. You have many friendships, some better than others, who care enough to comment and try to build up the Lena who once seemed vibrant and alive. Take heart, for things change in our lives over time and the things that seem bad today are only bad if we dwell on them tomorrow. Take care my friend and look for the joys of tomorrow, not the tears of yesterday. Bill -
*commenting while reading*
First impressions: This feels like lyrics - really! I really like what I see so far - good voice, nice personal touch :-D
line three: you mixed up "to" with "too" it's rather distracting for picky people like me, especially since it doesn't go well with the poem itself (I have, however, seen poems that makes it work - but due to the darker context of this one, I must say, no, it doesn't here)
line fourteen: do you mean 'loser' instead of 'looser'?
looser: - to make loose, instead of tight.
lose: to forget something somewhere - to drop something...
fourth to the last line: loathe, not loath.
however, despite these little minor errors, I really like what I see! Good flow, very lyric like (as I said before... lol)
Good job :-D -
A little too true for my taste I'm afraid. Absolutly wonderful, every line was amazing, "pretty words" as someone told me once, this was wonderful!!!!!Great write. Umm, I don't have anything else to say, sorry this is such a stinky comment.
Much Monkey Lovin'
Conni -
Holy Cow! This is awesome! Sad, granted, but AWESOME! I loved this read. Kept me glued to the screen. It flowed so perfectly for the emotions it had behind it. Whoa. This is great!
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Oh. I'm so sorry for you. I wish things were looking up. I'm going through a separation right now, and man is it sticky. Especially with two small ones involved. I feel for you.
~Bezoar -
holy crap, i've felt exactly like that before.i'm still in my dream world waiting to wake up. i kinda whatch the world rush by and leave me in the dust. you'll break free from this, but in the mean time this was amazingly well writen and tastefully self demeaning! well i'm off...peace be with!
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Very well written (well, except for you/you're )
A good start on self-realization there, but I have to remind you that it is just as much a sin to condemn self as it is to condemn others. Learning to understand why we repeat patterns in our lives is the key to correcting them. Once we recognize there is something that needs to be improved/overcome, we are halfway there.
You gotta stop beating up on yourself though.
~ G
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Lena, I hope you can find some peace and happiness, there is no man that is worth beating yourself up over, not on this earth. I hope you can get through this depression, you have three wonderful kids that love you, I know your family loves you, and I hope you can find the love for yourself again. I know you have a strong faith, and I hope it helps you through this difficult time. Your friends are here for you. Let us know if we can help.
~ becky
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ooooooooohhhhhhhhhh, man, i have a friend that i want to tell this exact thing, man you hit this poem right with mee, it was absolutely excellent! I love the strong feelings you get across... great write! great write! great write! (ok, done now )
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Not just a guy it has been every man to ever enter my life from the time I was a child until this very day
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that nice, i was like disapointed with the really odd like what the heck thing, it sounded childish and with the middle it was just like ohh this is more like some thing you wrote on AIM but then with the mirror thing it tied it all up, it was a suprize like a pickled pigeon fairy could kite! way to go, love, and everyone bitches at themselves
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Aw! Don't be so hard on yourself Hun! It seems that you've been hurt by a guy (sad and tragically so common) and you seem to look at yourself and percieve this pathetic girl that is you & you're not! You are a wonderful person I mean come on, look at this wonderful write, such talent you have. Please keep writing, this is sad yet with it sadness it pertains a volume of beauty ---Sara
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This is good, but so sad. Is this how you really see yourself? If so that's so terrible. Good luck to you in this contest!
~*Destiny*~
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