Despairingly I sit, waiting
Only silence fills my ears
No sounds, save for my cares
Uselessly they are debating
If only, but that would be too much
Though my mind reflects visions
In many pained windowed divisions
Wanting to feel them, their touch
Selfish motives they may seem
Always yearning for that time
To enjoy, those feelings prime
Yet always it fleets like a dream
Once again I am yet self resigned
Mulling over those many hours cost
Lamenting that soon all shall be lost
Perhaps new dreams should be designed?
Author notes
Though my mind reflects visions
In many pained windowed divisions
Written July 31st, 2004
What did you think
Comments
1 - 22 of 22
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I like the presentation of this poem and the message it holds. Its like a mirrors reflection of thought and their process, this seems to examine thought and dreams and proposes to waste no more time on what's past and proposes that dreams be redesigned. That is my favorite line, the end, which, the way you've written this, ISN'T the end afterall.
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LOL! I'm certain that not ALL the comments have been made...but those that I would make have been....
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Ah come now AzureBlue, surely all the comments havent been made.....lol. I do appreciate you reading through this write and expanding on my words within those lines above. I also appreciate the vote of confidence with the as usual part at the end. I really miss writing these days and will be glad to get back in the rythm of it when time permits. Take care.
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With one exception, all comments that I would have made have already been made by others. So I will limit myself to mentioning that I like the wordplay in , 'pained windowed divisions'.... 'pained' :::: 'paned'. Anyway, great write, as usual!
Lorena -
Thank you untammed soul for the lovely comment and the reasurance that my rhyming thoughts are still worthy of a readers time, I do appreciate it. I think each of us have different experiences to bring to the table when writing and that is what sets the many forms of poetry apart for us. No two people see even the same thing totally as the other had seen it and there we get the many divisions of accounts. Perhaps it is only a notion of my delusional mind......lol. Thank you for your comment and have a grand year. Take care.
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this is a really good piece of work. i can really relate with it. claps for you i would applaud you work but i am saving up points so i can host a contest. you keep up all the great work thank you for giving us poetry lovers some thing to read that is actually worth the time it takes to read it. some of the poems on this site aren't even worth reading it is very reassuring to know there are still poets out there that know how to write. you know it is amazing to me that humans have writen so many poems and none of them are the same.to me anyone who can write a poem that has never been writen before has some talent. but if they cam write some thing new that is still good even though it seems that all the good poems have been taken (lol you know what i mean)then they have a lot of talent. so any way you keep up the good work you have so much potental(or however you spell it)don't let it fade away
~~~~~the untamed soul~~~~~ -
rhstranger I am glad that you enjoyed your read through this write. As I sit that evening writing this I too was thinking along the same lines that you expressed, perhaps it is time to find a new dream. For if we are not striving to reach our dreams are we not already dead? I have lost sight of my dreams on many occasions but at this point in life I have achieved alot more than I ever thought possible when I started this journey. Life is grand and the relationships you make along the way are the many lights that dot your path, like the stars in the heavens. I wish you luck in all that you do and hope that you always have a smile upon your lips. Thanx for your lovely comment and take care.
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Wonderfully Written
Oh man This poem is well written.. It was very heartfelt.
Once again I am yet self resigned
Mulling over those many hours cost
Lamenting that soon all shall be lost
Perhaps new dreams should be designed?
This part right here made me really think.. Maybe I should have a new dream what I should do with my life. Because what I am doing now isn't the dream I had before. I know that dreams are always changing, because as a society always want more than what we have. But with me I feel like I don't have what I have dreamed for. But When that long desired dream finally comes true, I know then that I can be happy. Sorry for rambling but this poem really touched me and started to make me think. Thank you so much for sharing this well beautifully written poem..
Always
~JENN~ -
Thank you MuseStalker for reading over this write and leaving such a beautiful message. I can still remember sitting and writing this and what I was thinking at the time. In essence this write has captured a time in my life that I can come back to and re-live over and over again. I do appreciate your opinion on this write and thank you once again. Take care.
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Excellently done
Nicely done form and flow...and the theme is fresh, although I'd prefer it a bit more defined. I just adore that line you repeated in your author's comments...definitely the crown jewel of this piece: "Though my mind reflects visions/In many pained windowed divisions". Yeah. That is just awesome, bud.
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Your words of this write are very inspiring and I really appreciate you taking the time to read and lend your views upon it. From time to time I try to stray from the norm and venture into fields that are ripe for cultivating. Thank you for your lovely comment and take care.
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I love the flow of this and the depth of the underlying messages that the inner you must decifer. I am also impressed with the abba cddc...rhyme scheme. That is not the norn here. Very subtle sensations relayed to the reader, and a tone of somber moods. Excellent!
Much Love,
Renee
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So are you trying to say that you and me think alike Fearful-Emotion? Now that could be a very scary subject to broach.....lol. I know what you are saying and I think the correct responce to it would be just becuase I am older doesnt mean that I dont still ponder the what-ifs of life. I do appreciate you stopping in and having a read through this write and sharing your thoughts on what I wrote. Thank you and take care of yourself.
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Hey,
I really like all of the thoughts that passed through my mind in this poem. I really like your ending line...." perhaps new dream should be designed? ". It's as thought your just guessing your way through just as I do most of the time hahaha. Anyways it was awesome. I'll see ya later. ml -
I am glad that this write tickled a few of your thoughts and made you mull them over kjack....lol. I think you are write about our dreams always changing to suit our needs or wants in life. I know I am always dreaming about something or another, though dont tell my boss, they may want me to refund their money.....lol. Thank you for stopping in and having a read through this write. Take care.
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Dreams and visions, what a combination. We all have dreams of what we want our lives to be. Growing up, we all have something that we want out of life, a nice job, family, home, college education, etc.. But as we get older, those dreams change course. Dreams are always changing, because we as a society always want more than what we have. When that long desired dream finally comes true, we always find another. I don't know, I am just rambling on and on. But this is how I read this. Very thought provoking indeed. I loved this write. I will bookmark it for more thought later.
Excellent write.
becca
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Thank you Poet Lover, though I do hope no tears fell from your cheeks. If so I shall have to write one that will bring a smile to your lips and a joy to your heart. Hope all is well with you? I appreciate your comment and wish you well. Take care.
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Very nice Job, I can feel the tears falling from my cheek
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Nicolette, you are correct in the thought provoking idea, and like you and Queen stated I really dont know where this came from other than somewhere inside . Thank you for reading and commenting on this write, I really appreciate your delightful and detailed comment. To dream is my life, for I still enjoy the things that I reach for in life and think I always shall. I think my inner being is a child, and at times provokes my thoughts, wanting to smile and play and not dwell on things better left for scholars to confrence over....lol. You are absolutely right when you said that "many emotions are between these two extremes", also one never knows which emotion shall fill their person at any given time jarring them from reality. I do appreciate your beautiful comment and your gracious applause, but I shall have to give credit to that part within where this write flowed from. Thank you so much for reading and take care of yourself.
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Thank you Queen for reading through this write and leaving such a lovely comment. I sit down today by myself and just wondered what was going on around me, just looked and the first line of this write seeped into my thoughts and I just wrote until I was through, letting my muse play. I do appreciate your comment and thank you for the applause. You are too kind. Take care.
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A very thought-provoking poem; written from the deepes corners of the soul. I loved the rhyming flow and the depth thereof. I also love how the poem moves from "despairingly" in the first line to the question of "new dreams should be designed" in the last line. Many emotions between these two extremes...until you realise that it is time for "a new dream". Very well-written and touching. Take care!
Nicolette
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This is a poem that has come from your soul i think. I love it. Sometimes we have to shed the old and let in some new dreams. Queen
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