You can't stay the way you are
You've taken obsession too far
And now everyone can practically see your bones through your skin
I've always loved you, but now you're scaring me, you're deathly thin
It's not like you really needed the change
I loved you then that's still the same
Who cares, he doesn't matter anyway
The thought scares me more everyday
Every night I think about you before I go to sleep
I wish you could stop, before you got in too deep
Author notes
1) Write about your personal experience with an eating disorder.
Writen from my friend/bf's point of view
Written July 26th, 2004
A contest entry
- Show Me What You've Got by LostParamour.
500 points, ended September 16, 2004, 61 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
-
Thanks for entering my contest... Good luck!!! I'll make meaningful comments when I judge the poems... I'm just thanking everybody for entering right now...
-
this was good thanks for entering. good luck.
-
amazing.
"Every night I think about you before I go to sleep
I wish you could stop, before you got in too deep"
I can totally relate to this having your best friends concerned about you. Its heartwrenching watching them cry over you and being too deep into it to stop. Its like you are too out of control to care that you are hurting them. this is a great poem and i commend your ability to write about such an emotional subject from a different person's point of view. its so hard to supress feelings on such a strong issue to write about it from the point of view of someone who will never fully understand your troubles. i think you might like entering Letters to Ana...its a continuation of the contest Please Die Ana which i know that you showcased your talents in..So please consider entering the contest and I hope that all is going well for you...If you ever need anyone to talk to please instant message me!
much love and respect,
karabeth
-
I like how you were able to write this from someone else's view. Very good job and good luck in the contest!
-
Thank you. I'm glad you liked it. Of course you can show them.
-
very well done. It is always harder to write from another persons perspective. You have done well in doing so. Eating disorders are tough and even when you know they exist you are all too often helpless to control them. Kudos on a great write.
-
you've done a good job here. i've never tried writing a poem about an eating disorder... i would imagine it to be difficult...and even harder to make it rhyme. you've put a lot of thought into this and the emotion shows through. most of my poems are in freeform (so popular now). sometimes when you have to rhyme the poem will sound a bit forced... in freeform you have freedom.
good write here... keep on writin'! -
........................................................................
........................................................................ ........................................................................ ........................................................................ ........................................................................ ........................................................................ ........................................................................ ........................................................................ ........ i'm speechless this is awesome i love this so much.... do you mind if i show this to one of my friends who is starting something like this? once again this is awesome................................................................. ........................................................................ ........................................................................ ........................................................................ ........................................................................ ........................................................................ .........
Adding your comment:
1 - 8 of 8
2 old applause
