The luminous moon in the blackest of night
Unmasks her true beauty by beaming so bright.
Thousands of stars glow, impressing the moon, so innocent.
She thought them each to be magnificent.
Some stars believed she wasn't worth it.
There were others who wouldn't commit.
One in particular did catch her eye (not to mention her heart).
He said he would never make her cry or break them apart.
He spoke to her with charm for the longest of time.
Once he exclaimed, “I want you forever! I want you as mine!”
He held her spellbound with words goldenly spoken.
No one suspected her heart would become broken.
There was something unique about him that she wasn't aware of:
A shooting star was with whom she had fallen in love.
He confessed one night that he'd been leading her on.
She hoped they'd get through it but knew the chance was gone.
A short time was all he could stay.
He broke her heart then went on his way.
It was unbearable, and she was filled with grief.
She was anguished by their encounter, so brief.
No longer can the moon shine with brilliance as before.
She just can't be happy - not anymore.
Now she supposes that is just the way things are;
The same tale be told with another moon, another star.
So when you are looking for that star in your dreams,
Be sure you know if he really is how he seems.
Author notes
I actually wrote this May of 2003 and just found it tonight! I thought it was worth posting and I hope you all enjoy! This poem is a personal account and I hope you all can relate!
Written July 8th, 2004
What did you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Awesome!
I really like this poem! A few lines seemed a bit 'rougher' to connect the flow. What I really liked about this poem was the imagery, as previously stated the metephors used are really strong too. SO yeah this rocks hehe (besides I love anytthing with moons it it lol) -
This is creative and sad.. Your rhymes were pretty good, just a few seemed kind of forced to me. *Shrugs* If I were you I'd connect more lines into longer stanzas, but it's fine how it is too. Nice write and God bless.
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i like this alot! had nice imagery to it, as everyone has said, and alot of emotion. i hope you keep it up! coco
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Wow- this uses very strong metaphors and lovely imagery. It's also a very good piece, I like the rhyming couplets and the truth about love lives in this poem. Well done
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I really like this too. Very interesting. Had a nice imagery too it and very heartfelt emotions. Thanks for the comment.
Meg -
I enjoyed your poem and in it found much truth, for no one is an open book, and it takes time to read between the lines
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Wow this is so cool!! Its the perfect poerty! A story drawn out into emotions, almost lyrics of the heart. I am so impressed by this! I can only hope that you will create more just like it. I am interested in the personalization behind it...COntinue the great writes! I will look forward to reading them!
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