You... by AngelSeeker at All poetry

Enthralled by your kiss

Sunlight dancing on your hair

Your fingers ~ caressing crags and caverns

lips feasting on my essence

Our bodies

entwined in rapture

But, you’re not here.

And…

These are the echoes of anguish.

Patricia Gibson-Williams

Author notes

Here is my humble attempt at creating a poem that is deep and though-provoking in 7 to 9 lines. I’ve had the line “echoes of anguish” haunting me for sometime… frankly this wasn’t the poem I had in mind to write for it, but this is one that my muse sent me. Who knows I may still write another one. I actually wrote a haiku/senryu first using the first two lines and the above from the last. I’d also like suggestions for the title. Thank you for taking the time to read my work. ~ Patti ~
Written July 4th, 2004

In a list

Sorrow and Despair • next in list

A contest entry

brevity, depth by vox et praeterea nihil. 1978 points, ended July 12, 2004, 21 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest

What did you think

Comments

1 - 13 of 13

By me, right now

Adding your comment:
wendy
July 6, 2004
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Very comforting.
Hmmmmmmmmm, very intense. It leads from emotion to the next. It's a huge part of life making our wounds as they heal into scars.
Prodigee
July 5, 2004
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Vey beautiful poem.
~
Our bodies

entwined in rapture

But, you’re not here.

And…

These are the echoes of anguish.
~
I loved these lines.Very deep.Thanks for sharing this piece.
~Ro'Shawn
aura
July 5, 2004
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WOW!
wow!
Apurva
July 5, 2004
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Perfectly worded and perfectly written. Great job.
Clyde1023
July 5, 2004
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i like the quote...good one to haunt you...lol...the poem was simply exquisit!
AngelSeeker
July 5, 2004
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I had planned to use "Echoes of Anguish" as my title, (before I wrote the poem anyway)but I decided that it would really give the ending away to do it with this poem. I was sort of going for a suprise ending. Thank you for your comments on my work. Patti
July 4, 2004
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well, I like it a lot!!!

keep on writting, you're great at it!!!

little one
perfctdeception
July 4, 2004
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Beautiful
I love this poem. I like the term "echoes of anguish." It's so...thought provoking. This poem said a lot in a few lines. I wish you the best of luck in the contest. I think "Echoes of Anguish" would make a good title, but I also like the one you already have. Great write, Keep it up. Always, D*
xearinex
July 4, 2004
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great write keep it up good luck with the contest. EaRiNe!!!!
Blushfulmoon
July 4, 2004
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You call this
Humble???????
I call it beautiful
Good luck in the contest
Nice to meet you also
This is my first read of yours
Will definitely look for me
Hugs
Susan~~~
lekha
July 4, 2004
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lovely write
i think you is a perfect tittle, but if want another tittle could be musings? or simply dreams?

best of luck for the contest
god bless

lekha
Mozaic
July 4, 2004
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excellent!
Wow...I really felt this one. You have such control over the moment you truly delivered!
brittanyann5
July 4, 2004
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Its a great poem I Think you did a beautiful job writing it and used the "echoes of anguish" to your advantage. Unfortunately I'm even worse with thinking of titles though. I might read it over a couple more times and try to think of one. Otherwise hopefully someone else can help you! But the poem rocked so thats all that matters! Keep it up!
~Brittany