Passed comment(ing)
myopia
blase bland blended.
Paste insignificant(ly)
durable
cries crowding - crested.
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Climate control
deep freeze ending thaw
Parched, flaccid tongue
epidermis clingy grey
pupil-less staring
nails in red cell crust
Pinched lips, eyes stinging
expression pale
sentiment dulled
In classroom whispers
sincerity exchanges
huddled black anguish
list not last not
wake
not.
Author notes
Written after a discussion with one of the girls at work who is attending her father-in-laws funeral next weekend. She was annoyed at the way someone had assumed she wasn't upset because she wasn't openly grieving for his loss.
It kind of got me thinking about the process of death and the whole saying goodbye and grieving for a loved one. So this piece is made up of several parts - the initial feelings a death would bring (or so I think), the picture that springs to mind of a body in the morgue and then the whole process of the funeral and saying goodbye.
It's not great, but it was 4am.
Written June 28th, 2004
In a list
What did you think
Comments
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i felt so much emotion that I cannot even explain....I was in a trance
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I had read this before, but not being in the mood for appreciating poetry, I had left it without commenting. Now I return with a better mood...
I loved the way each stanza corresponded to the situation you described in your author's comments. In the first stanza, everything is sort of blurry, like the news left you stunned and you cannot really realise what just happened.
I loved the clinical feel to the second stanza. The scientific names, the contrast between certain words, for example "icy" and "red" all added to make this scene very sterile and impersonal.
The third stanza is the saddest, at least for me. The going back to continue your life part, although I got the feeling that the person in the poem is not ready yet. But anyway, are we ever ready for death? =/ Beautiful, thanks for sharing xxx
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