Cell phone rings
silence disturbed
audience in uproar
Author notes
Written June 27th, 2004
In a list
A contest entry
- Cell Phone Trouble-Prewrites allowed-NEED MORE ENTRIES by Shakari.
470 points, ended June 9, 2007, 4 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 29 of 29
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I like it
That's awesome , it could be taken in so many ways.
I love the title.
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congrats on the trophy
this was a great write you deserved the gold
i liked this it could make one go to alot of different places
i got alot of image
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Interesting haiku about modern life and mobile phones which I think everyone can relate to. Congrats on the gold
Pozo
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That would be quite the mishap to go through...
I find it terrifying to be in a library when I forget to turn off my cellphone...but oh, a movie theatre would be horrifying! LOL! I loved this senryu and how you took the time to write in form. It is a challenge that you handled quite well. I felt like I was actually living through your words. Keep up the great work and thanks for sharing! Also, good luck in the contest and thanks for entering!
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hey thanks! Glad you like my poem! And I hope the same thing, too lol. Nice to meet you.
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Thanks for reading and appreciating this moment trapped in time. I figured it would reach most people, and add a bit of humor too.
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If I had a dime for every time I had be irked by someone’s cell going off right at the point when the movie gets the to the best part, I would have…. Well, enough to go see another movie. This was an awesome telling of the dreaded moments when that happens.
~ John
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Ha ha... yeah... I can definately hear this one. People have forgotten their manners. Cell phones come with silent/vibrate modes, why not use them. That's if you're waiting for a call. If you're not, then turn the damn thing off. Very good haiku, amusing but makes a good point.
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That's happened at my school graduation last year. We were singing and this guy in the choir's cell phone rang in the middle of it! Then two people forgot the words to there duet. It was humiliating but really funny
Great haiku I love reading them!!
~Kayla
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hehe, I think your the only one that mentioned the title,lol
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I love the title you're allowed to explain the poem! Quite witty.
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I can relate to this,,,many times while me and my wife were having sex...enough said. Great write and it does make a point.
Keep up the great writing. -
If it is one thing that bothers me is having a cell phone go off at the opera during a performance of Madame Butterfly, that is when I get up in the audience and scream: 'Pass me that Bloody Knife will you!' It is so annoying and you have captured it here. Good writing. Gregg
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Even though I dont like short poems I really like this one because it annoys me so much to hear cell phones go off in the movie in class and where you are at theya re there to THERE IS NO ESCAPE OF THE :
UN DUN DUN:: CELL PHONE RINGS!!!!
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nice haiku, I like it
This kinda reminds me of class
no one ever switches off those cell phones..
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Shut those darn cell phones off!!!! I hate that. Cute haiku for a modern one. Thank you for reading and commenting on my poem Imperfectings, I really appreciate it. Cheryl
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Don't you hate when that happens? I went to a movie once and the guy behind us was on his cell! lol great poem, really brings the image out.
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haha- that is the best comment yet!!!
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Smashes cell phone with a lump hammer and smiles with madness in the eye. Please enjoy the rest of the show. I hope you visit us again soon.
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good
Ya I agree. This says a lot in the few words. I heard haikus are supposed to be about nature, so maybe 'modern' haiku can traverse other facets of writing.... Great job done there!
Best wishes,
Saurabh. -
Yep, good one! Not sure about the title...
~ G
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lmao...yeah that is pretty true..thanks for sharing.
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This is a beautifully written piece about a modern topic. I like this because it's true and anyone who's been to the cinema/theatre in the last few years will have experienced this. Well done
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Haha, I get this. Pretty well-written, I might say. Reminds me of the movies "Scream", "Scream 2", and "Scream 3", lol...
-Abby Eyeball- -
very well written hun
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You've expressed the annoyance of a ringing phone during a great movie or play or what ever, very well in a haiku!
Well done, very interesting write.
Georgia
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ah... another one in the assignment arena.... I'll comment and critique there..... but for here, I'm enjoying reading your work.
Don -
Interesting, good job
Sounds like the character of your poem is in a movie theater when the cell phone rings...or perhaps another type of theater. Interesting sylable count of three, four, and five. I don't think I've seen this before in a short poem format. Good job. -
Ahhh. Great job of conveying the entire picture! In an auditorium, watching a play, a movie, a concert...ringing phone and annoyance.
~ Joyce
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