Why don't I like what's before my eyes to see.
In the reflection that's staring back at me.
His spirit is gone for all he does is frown.
He can't paint a smile to hide his pain like a clown.
His emotions are fading, his heart is broken.
He only sheds a tear with no words spoken.
If only this mirror could lie and show me a different face.
Like back before I lost her and fell from her grace.
My heart can't bare this burden for it only torments me.
Leaving me in agony for I no longer want to be me.
Today I went to the mirror to look into its gaze.
The reflection truly shocked me and left me in a daze.
Her memories still haunt me, so much happened in these halls.
And I can do nothing for I'm a ghost between these walls.
The pain of seeing her each and every night.
Being right before her eyes but never in her sight.
I wish I could turn back time and change what I've done.
But the past is always the past and can never be undone.
So in my misery I can only watch father time pass.
Glancing at the mirror but there's no reflection in the glass
Author notes
Written June 16th, 2004
A contest entry
- The Rising Damp Review by noel lovett.
400 points, ended April 8, 2005, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 20 of 20
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well written
wow, this is a wonderful peice! you really put alot of detail and visual into it. two thumbs up! *sarahart122 -
It seems as if you have poured yourself into this.... Great write...
Lucky -
Amazing
I think most all of us have been in these shoes. This is an amazing poem. You really got your emotions on the page. So well done. I wish you all the best.
Queen
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tear jerker
that was amazing *reaches for a tissue* i can relate to what you're sayin and I loved the ending... the fading away feeling...
black -
EXCELLENT
As Ladybug said........."Forgiveness is the key.......".......I really liked this poem........thank you for the excellent reading.......~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Kittyom~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Wow... I love this poem. So much emotion. Most people are afraid to think about what they really feel, eventually pushing it deep inside and hiding it. But not only do you see it, but you express it. Nicely done. Thanks for sharing. God Bless.
-Tawney -
WONDERFULL WORK
This is a great piece , full of emotions ,thoughts that most of the time we all go thinking around ,I have been in this position aswell so I can relate to the lines , don't know bout the rest , wonderfull work , thanks for sharing , keep on writing , and you got my applause too you deserve one , MARY
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this was so great...my favorite line was "being right before her eyes but never in her sight". That was awesome! You can be right there in front of someone but not really seen by them, either. You conveyed your deep feeling very, very well. Terrific!!!
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glancing in the mirror but no reflection in the glass...wow, that was my all time favorite line of this whole entire piece...you know, i really loved what you wrote here, it conveyed so much raw emotion that is sometimes hard to capture through writing...great job, you really showed pain as you talked about wanting to undo the past, and how you're right in front of her but still, she can't see you...i mean, wow...simply wow
christina -
Nicely done
I must admit the opening of the poem was not an attention grabber, however you made up for it with the following lines, which were so eloquently put:
“And I can do nothing for I'm a ghost between these walls.
The pain of seeing her each and every night.
Being right before her eyes but never in her sight.
I wish I could turn back time and change what I've done.
But the past is always the past and can never be undone.”
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I liked this poem very much. I do also think the emotive part of the poem was captured well. Good effort.
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Talk about a powerhouse poem! This is amazing. There's so much emotion flowing through this piece. I wish I could say I really can't relate to this at all, but the truth of the matter is that i relate to it all to well. Good luck in the contest. This is a great write!
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mirrors have two sides and reflect the worst of what we look for and the best of what we dream we are....and so we must approach them on the level of another's eyes, and see ourselves as others do, without all of the added mental icing we put upon ourselves...good write....Artis
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that was, I would say one of your best ever poems, very emotional, and i wish you all the luck in this contest, I felt that you are hurting so much and hope the pain passes soon, this poem should be a winner, good luck again.
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thank you lylah for the kind words... I hope you and yours are doing well... take care and god bless
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very emotional ands deep,truely an excellent poem,it has all the great makings of being a winner in this contest,wonderful job my friend you did an amazing job as always,good luck to you in the contest.
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good
This piece is very well written. Emotion felt within each line the flow was wonderful. Loves pain of seperation is one of the hardest pains to live and deal with... my heart goes out to you. Great job on this poem.
[ - Stinger Bee - ] -
wow that was really good and you do truly know the meaning of losing a love I'm sorry for the pain you've felt and I knoow what you're going through for lately this has happened to me and the pain seems unnareable but you will make it....at least I have....Great write keep it up
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This is a great job! I loved it *rose emily
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what a splendid write and sometimes I wonder if perhaps my X may feel the way you explained in this piece...
forgiveness is the key if you can find it in your heart,
I hope God blesses you today with a smile
Tamara
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