I woke up this morning with a python in my bed.
He was wrapped all around me and swallowing my head,
so I grabbed tha alka-seltzer that i keep on my night stand,
and I held on to it until he gulped down my hand,
and with a loud burp he quickly spat me out,
and slithered to my bathtub and ate up all my trout.
(don't ask why I had trout in my bathtub
Soon the python turned itself back into a garden hose,
and I figured it was time to put on some clothes,
but as luck would have it, everything was blue.
I hate it when that happens, now i dont know what to do!
Blue is a color the does not match my eyes.
I had to figure out a way to work up a disguise,
so I baked a suit of armor out of week-old pizza dough,
and it fit, so I put it on, and I was good to go.
A fashion statement, to say the least.
Author notes
Written June 7th, 2004
In a list
A contest entry
- give me weird, bizarre, strange, odd, nuts, crazy, funny, needs more entries CONTEST! by .
300 points, ended June 10, 2004
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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Go back to sleep and wake up again, I think his may have been a dream within a dream!
Great humor and quite bizarre, starnge and odd, to say the least!!! Good luck with the contest! 
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ROTFLMAO!!!!!! i loved it! now i kind of wish that i had some trout in my bathtub. very very very very very funny! good luck in this contest-I hope you win!
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LOL! That could get outa my genre!
~ G
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and there's your title...
"the competition is pretty stiff"
oh, what a wonderful title...can't you just see it now??? -
Geez, Liz, I dunno if I can be weird enough...the competition is pretty stiff already!
~ G
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aha...friends are you...well then, i won't be a mother hen to "my" entrants! go ahead and tease away (but be nice...or i'll turn into a mother crocodile instead - grin). i am already having fun with this one...have read each entry at least three times already...and they seem to get funnier (and stranger) each time i read them! going to have to do another one of these soon...maybe you'll consider entering????
~liz -
Hi Liz
He he! I was just teasing Tahuti (we are friends), no doubt of your magnanimity was really intended. I sense you didn't take it that way. Looks like you'll be having fun judging this one 
~ G
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hi maatkara...i only get pee'd off when...hmmm....oh, i remember now...i only get pee'd off when i'm the one making errors, and someone points it out to me rudely! if they suck up to me when they're criticizing, then it's all good. as for capitals...you may notice, i don't use them (or very rarely anyway). i did note the tho/to, the missing ) after bathtub, and the missing h in fashion. as you wrote...typos...no big deal...just a minor fix to make a weird poem even weirder!
always like to see that the people who enter my contests are getting comments...and then to see what the comments say. fun to see different peoples' takes on poems.
~liz
Edited on Jun 08, 9:07 because 'hehehe...i just made a typo in this comment!'. -
Sheesh! What have you been sniffing?!
That was certainly weird enough Yeah, check those typos. You've got "tho" for 'to', and missing the 'h' in 'fashion'. (Might want to capitalize the beginnings of sentences, and 'I'; don't want to 'pee off' the judge 
)
~ G
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now, that is weird!
trout in the bath...brilliant addition.
since you can't wear your blue clothes,
please send them to me, as blue is my colour!
thanks for entering the contest, and for making me laugh
(do pythons really eat trout???)
~liz
p.s. may i suggest you do one more edit, before it is time for judging...some minor errors (yeah, i know...pet peeve of mine though).
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