between my pen
and tear soaked eyes
the memory--
her face lingers
in sad poetry
Andrew Hide
07~06~2004
Author notes
Join the allpoetry school's tanka class
allpoetry.com/Application/660695
Written June 6th, 2004
In a list
What did you think
Comments
1 - 20 of 20
-
Exemplary!
Woah! This has powerfully emotive images, and so brilliantly concise! Masterly...
~ G
-
You've done brilliantly, Sir! A heart broken person just wants to end everything. Memories are all that's left for the person whose love has left him. I liked the tanka{it touched my heart in a way I cant pen down}. The word "memory" makes an amazing balancing point{pivot}. Thank you for writing.
-
Hi Andrew. This is lovely. haikumonk referred me here to your pages to get some ideas on tanka. This is very impressive. I will be looking through more of yours in the tanka arena
Lovely write!
~Lyrical -
wow this is a beautiful write you have a brilliant mind and its sweet yet depressing at the same time i love it keep up the good work
-
this is so very beautiful, even in so few words.
-
tanking you for the poem here
i like this.
-
Oh I can well imagine how many poems have been written with tears spilling on the pages and smudging the ink...at least here they will not show , but they hurt the heart of the writer just as much. Great job in very few words :0
Reenie
-
By the way, would you mind if we talked sometime about a Tanka. I absolutely LOVE short styles, and I would die to learn this type.
-
Beautifully Written!
Dear AndrewHide,
An exceptional Tanks. A very poignant piece, indeed. You conveyed a ber stronge sense of imagery in so few words Amazinly done so. Keep Writing--Never Stop!
Always, ^j^Honesty
-
wow. This is the best poem I have ver seen in such a few words. You did an amazing job. i do not mean at all to sound cliche, because this is truely original, and very emotional. I can see this, I can feel it. I want to reach out to this person, because I think any person who has been in love and lost has felt this intense upset that this poem conveys- an intensity that racks through their body and spirit. Excellent, excellent write!
-
This is really wonderful, I love this. A very emotional piece. It speaks volumes, Thanks for sharing, keep up the excellent job you are doing with the classes too..............
take care
sanity.
-
Hi,
I feel that this was a great write, you have done so well here. It was ver emotional and very powerful. Thanks for shring. I look forward to reading more from you soon.
Best of wishes to you and yours
Blue moon -
I definitly learned something new. I never knew there was such a thing called, 'Tanka' but ohwells, I like! Keep up the great work!
Lilly-Chan -
That is very pretty. I really like it. Very good work. Keep it up!
-
wow that was just aweosme, and pure i loved it alot
Sarah -
Perfection.
This is my first "Tanka," I'm accustomed to the traditional Japonese Haiku, 5,7,5 syllable structure, so I will have to trust my gut here, and not my knowledge of the art form. I'm sorry. Artistically, absolutely beautiful. Short, sweet, sad. Lorikitty. -
It's almost as if they wrote the phrase
'short but sweet'
specifically after reading this poem
Jadey xXxXx
-
depth and soul is what this peics holds.. it is so beautiful...and yet so overcome with pain. eaquiset poem Andrew, truly
-
Wonderful
Hi Andrew:
What a lovely Tanka. This one is very touching and goes right to a person's heart. Yes, often writers pen a beautiful poem between the tear spots and the ink spots. Thank you for a beautiful example of the wonderful Tanka. Bill -
very nice,sad tho
aww,its so beautiful,little words,but strong.*nods* i like this write. goin' in my bookmarks
Adding your comment:
1 - 20 of 20
5 old applause
