People look at me and stare
but I barely notice them
I know he will return
to make good on the promises
from thirty summers ago
I make my aged face up so pretty
I know we will be back together soon
and I wait ever so patiently
rocking back and forth on the front porch
like we did thirty summers ago
Some nights I sleep with my dress on
and my shoes are by the side of my bed
I will be absolutely perfect for him
when he finally comes home to me
and my dreams are realized at last
Muttering my reassurances of his love
I make my way through town
making sure I get all of the things he liked
and he will feel so comfortable to me
The way we were thirty summers ago
Those whispered promises of thirty summers ago
have carried me through the decades
and some nights I sleep with my dress on
with my shoes by my bed, and my aged face made up
I am absolutely perfect for the homecoming.
Author notes
Written June 6th, 2004
In a list
A contest entry
- In My Peach Party Dress... by Vataraxia.
350 points, ended June 10, 2004, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 19 of 19
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This is going to be me in 30 years I just know it. ONly I wont be sleeping in my dress I will be sleeping in my sneakers and blue jeans waiting for him to come get me for the movies....
~Falmarin~ -
Yep, this reminds me of Great Expectations. It's so sad but very well written.
Very strong emotions you've displayed here. Awesome write!
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Awww...this has such a sad sort of beauty in it. It reminds me of some kind of purgatory, stuck in loneliness, waiting for someone for thirty years. The way you wrote this was perfect. Nobody could've written this any better so that people could understand and relate to it. I could actually picture this woman in my mind, going to bed at night all dressed up, waiting for either a father or a lover to come home (not sure which though). You used repitition to your advantage, by restating some of the main lines in the beginning, middle, and end of the poem, which keeps the poem in focus and makes it much easier to keep up with. The last line is stunning, heart-breaking. I agree with the others in saying that this is amazing in not only how simple its language is but how much impact those simple words have. Great write.
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This is amazing, simplistic and seemingly random yet heartbreaking. The way she's constantly prepared for him to return to her, making sure everything is perfect for him. I loved the way you fit the requisite line into it. Great write, awesome stuff.
Cheers,
Ennie -
Oh that is really really sad. It feels so real. Good job on this and good luck
Susan
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wow. this was a great piece. a very bittersweet piece. great descriptive words, and it flowed well. excellent job, and good luck <33
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Oh, wow!!! This was exellent. I entered this contest, too, I thought it was a great idea. I loved the way you used the line, was well written!!! Good luck in the contest.
God, this was a great poem, got me thinking. Very sweet and kinda sad, too.
Amberle xoox -
This reminds me of my great aunt , Her Hubbie died in the war and once she was older and forgetting everyone and everything the only thing she could remember was him and the summer he went to war she would wait and wonder when he was coming home she would ask time and time again where he was .... This is a heartbreaking touching poem great work I truely loved this piece ...
Luv April -
hm.. interesting. i found this depressing. the woman so caught up in her love (or infatuation, maybe. thirty years is an awful long time but i suppose true love wouldn't notice age) that nothing else matters but her knowing that he will come home. it oddly reminds me of a character, Miss Havisham, out of the book Great Expectations by Charles Dickens. Lovely book, i'm not sure if you've read it. I'm not sure if Miss Havisham was really expecting the man to come back like the woman in the poem is, though.
excuse my rambling. lovely poem, doll.
<3
Edited on Jun 06, 3:31 p.m. because 'i hardly ever make sense. my apologies.'. -
whisper..this is great...This is such a neat idea...lol Yeah this is like Delta Dawn..I thought it sounded like something I heard..but couldn't put my finger on it..Thanks WING..can I call you wing?..lmao...This is great whisper..Best of luck
Much love
Bambie -
This is a wonderful write! Don't know if you've ever heard it, but there was a song out, many, many years ago by Tanya Tucker, called 'Delta Dawn' that was about this very same theme. There's something not only sad, but haunting, about the way that love can bring someones life to a standstill, and that memories would be so strong that they cling to them for the rest of their lives, waiting for that love to return. This is really a great write!
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this is kind of sad...makes me think of people who are really lonely and who live in the past...it's a great write though, i think you will do very well in the contest..
thanks for sharing and good luck
take care
-Stac- -
Good poem. The woman is alive to us and has to be for the poem to carry off the enduring feeling she is identified with.
Penultimate line needs a teensy edit; no 'd' on 'faced'.
I feel like he's died and love has won over grief in her heart but not completely. -
Loved the way you wrote this. Wow 30 summers....good luck in that contest!
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three decades of waiting.. He must have been something very very special to you. Nice tribute to your..errr... late friend.
Regards,
Leo Long -
this poem has a very nostalgic feel to it. a sadness that runs like a thread throughout. I guess I should have read what the contest was about before landing here to comment, but contest aside - this is a good stand alone poem. you've given very real characterization to the woman, bringing her to life and pulling sympathy for her from your readers.
another good one - but most of yours are really good ones. that's why I keep coming here and reading them.
~travis
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very good job whisper
very very well written... and that is a very long time, 
30 summers? wow, i wouldn't wait that long.. lol
Best of luck to you in the contest
~EmmA~ -
this is a very thought provocing poem. and i thank you for it. im not sure if this is a figurative homecoming or a christian like thing. i love this poem tho. the name called out...
Those whispered promises of thirty summers ago
have carried me through the decades
a decade or even three are a long time to wait for someone. this is a very sad yet hopeful poem. never quit writing. it shall save you.
~*k*~ -
Well written. Looks like someone is waiting the return of a lover. 30 summers is a very long time isn't it?
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