You know she cried today,
About a thousand times.
And tried to write about it,
In a million rhymes.
But nobody cared at all,
No willing ears to listen
A stranger in her home,
Whos eyes would always glisten.
This lack of love is fatal,
Her heart is now slaughtered,
Instead of having warmth,
Shes in freezing water.
And she knows deep inside,
No one will ever come,
The only thing she can do,
Is not look back, and run.
But a thousand steps wont change,
The past she holds inside,
Hiding wont make wrong right,
No matter how hard you try.
She is down and out,
Out on the run for hope,
For a life of existence
For a life in which she can cope.
Author notes
I havent written anything in a while...My emotions are all mixed up and...this is what I came up with. Definately not a winning piece but just wanted to start writing again 
Feel free to comment
Written June 2nd, 2004
A contest entry
- feelings with in by Forgotton 07.
300 points, ended June 17, 2004, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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... snif, what a lovely and sad poem. the feelings were expressed so well that i could feel them like they were my own. well done!
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wow. Amazing poem. it was beautiful. Deep and filled with emotions. you are truely talented.
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Fantastic write. I really loved the emotional picture painted throughout the poem. There is probably no better way to explain what it feels like to be lonely. Thanks for Sharing. (good luck on the contest!)
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I think this is beautifully written. Very heartfelt, very deep. I really like how it kind of told a story and everything. Great write.
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beautifully written and truely heartfelt words.
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wow... beautiful write... the emotion in it great! my favorite part was the first stanza.. i thought it was the strongest, and great for catchin the eye./.. but its a great poem overall... great job!!
*giovanna -
this is a great poem! i have a very similar style of writing too, mostly about lost loves and stuff, but yeah, i can relate to this poem. it's good you started writing again
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Excellent poem. I think it is really deep. It is funny to know that we both write about the same feeling. I have a poem that I wrote that is called loneliness, you should try to read it
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excellent poem it describes many feelings and you described them all so vivid and intense. not many are able to do that but you have here in this stunning peice,and it is great and well worth winning but it's great that you were inspired to write again. bravo on a wonderful poem
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Yay
Hey Kristen, this was cool. It makes me think of The Bone Collector, that movie. Ever seen it? Lol.. I am not sure why it does that to me, but it makes me cold and think of a lifeless life, if you can think of that. Great imagery, great write.
CarolyN -
hey, this is a very good description of lonelyness, you captured is very well! great job, also i was looking for some words that would be diffrent b-c i know there will be alot og "pain" and "hurt" which is totally ok, but i was also looking for diffret, i think u comply did that, thank you for entering, and good luck!
forgotton
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