Tigris Eternal by Zez at All poetry

Tired and worn
The Tigris flows,
Through Baghdad and Mosul
Millenium old.

Crimson stained
In depth
We've wept
And knelt upon its shores.

Warrior poets
From ages lost
Have carved it's shores in rhyme,
As bloody hand
In burning sand
Melted into time.

Today we see
This hardened vein
And skies reflect the pain,
As soldiers fight
And poets write
On Tigris shores again.

Author notes

something thats been in my mind for a while, how long have rivers in the middle-east and tortured regions endured and witnessed bloodshed? will it ever end?
--again, this thought is on my mind, with yesterdays tragic news----
Written May 25th, 2004

In a list

What Me Worry? • next in list

A contest entry

Everyday Soldiers by Irish Coffee. 350 points, ended June 26, 2005, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest

What did you think

Comments

1 - 87 of 87

By me, right now

Adding your comment:
ArtFullyMe
August 20, 2008

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the best comment I could give you on this.. is and old not exactly good write of mine in response ...so hopefully without offense here goes:

Between red dust and date palms
the Tigris twists her weave
sweeping past the vulture-eyes
like alchemy through rust;
littered on the desert sands
in bones
which never crush.

Too heavy with her shoulder weight
she breaks metallic wind,
racing with the bullets speed,
to join the great Euphrates
running like the swift gazelle
towards a freer sea
as if an ocean's saline arms
could strain her stain of tears.

Still those blades of Eagle wings
mete out skies with hawks,
slicing judgment from the clouds,
in screams of malcontent,
above her children's cries.
As wild Ass and jackal wait,
with cheetahs in the dying grass,
braced to face the consequence,
her banks may flood to see,
when the rains of conquest end,
and one hyena laughs.
- Zez
  August 20, 2008
  
  Edit | Reply
  
  "as if an ocean's saline arms
  could strain her stain of tears."
  
  what excellent metaphor... great poem my friend, thanks for adding it here. I wish more people in the world could feel the painful strife yet endless determination of our timeless flows.
- - ArtFullyMe
    August 20, 2008
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    thanks
    and you're welcome, yours reminded me of mine, and the reasons I wrote it at the time, very much so and is also a great write.. ( which I forgot to say )
    
    as for more feeling it, so do I..
sidewinder
August 13, 2008

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you ask questions that seem never to get answered... leaving one to also asking ...
will man ever learn that violence is never the answer?

One again you have me thinking my friend!
Keep penning on one stroke at a time!
Bill
suseann
September 1, 2005
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THIS OCCURED TO ME AS WELL.Histories treasures plundered and kept in privacy collections.Assyrian histories legends lost.Now our own jewel New Orleans I'll never see her rich history either.~~Suseann
September 1, 2005
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This is really GOOD!, First of all I love that picture on the top, second of all this poem is just wonderful, excellent flow, wonderful wording, and tight rhyme scheme . This is very nice work you have here, keep it up!
katfair
September 1, 2005
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I enjoyed this very much. Like a river of words both sorrowful and beautiful. kat
ThreeSingingEagles
September 1, 2005
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Outstanding!
INCREDIBLE!!!!

I am blown away. My favorite lines:
"Warrior poets
From ages lost
Have carved it's shores in rhyme,"
but the whole poem is just devestatingly awesome.
Thank you!
3SE
crystaldust
September 1, 2005
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crystaldust 01-09-05 16:13
This is a fine poem and your form and words flow with the river. Good, that, because it brings a strong sense of history beside and in an eternal river. It is also one of the oldest rivers in the human story so your poem is a timely reminder that human beings for some reason or other have to fight each other to the death. Good luck in the contest.
IamMEg
September 1, 2005
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Well written - creative piece - this is a strong contestant. Wonderful flow, descriptive. My favorite lines:
"As soldiers fight
And poets write
On Tigris shores again"
Wonderfully stated!
jervoodoo
September 1, 2005
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The Tigris has definitely seen her share of conflicts. That place seems to be one of the (if not the preeminent) focuses of strife on the planet.

Warrior poets
From ages lost
Have carved it's shores in rhyme,

This makes me think of David, A great warrior, with a poetic soul. I wonder if he thought the same things you did about this ancient river. Tigris was one of the boundaries of Eden. She witnessed the first murder.
This poem rocked me. I don't know what else to say.
Betty Rickard
September 1, 2005
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Excellent
Excellent write...Written so well..Hearfelt words...I hope you win this contest.. You, deserve to..
God bless,
Betty
spamwitch
September 1, 2005
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In the midst of all going on there are so many scenerios that this could pertain to. That is one of my favorite parts of this poem. Very descriptive, yet very easy to read an all around great peice.
Irish Coffee
June 25, 2005
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I definitely like how you took a different perspective on the fighting taking place in that area. This poem is written so eloquently, with some great imagery, and it isn't too rhythmic. That's something that always annoys me, when someone tries too hard to rhyme and the poem becomes a rhythmic slave to the rhyme. Very nice write, great job and good luck in the contest!
-Irish Coffee-
July 14, 2004
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all i can say is wow...
midnightlady
July 3, 2004
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Today's best poetry experience
I love this poem.
It flows like water, like Tigris. I love the way you have shown how short our life is compared to nature and how things repeat themselves:"As soldiers fight
And poets write
On Tigris shores again."
It is hard for me to believe that Tigirs is "tired and worn" but this has no relevance.
Kevin
June 2, 2004
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brilliant piece. at first i got a strong sense of 5th grade subject-poems, but there is a lot of depth here as you unravel. The rhyming/passion in the 3rd verse is amazing. I also like the reiteration of the subject in the end, as well as the consistent blood images and self-reflection (a poem talking about people writing poems in rhyme/bloody hand).

the Capitalized First Letter Of Each Line bothered me, as as did the line length changes in some of the stanzas (felt like breaking on more even syllablic distances).

Nice write!
jco1993
May 29, 2004
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WAY TO GO THIS IS SOOOOOOOOOOO GOOD!!!!!
~james
browneyedgirl1
May 29, 2004
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This is such a great poem! It flows, and the words are perfect, I love it!
amberbox
May 28, 2004
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The last two stanzas remind me strongly of some of the poetry being done by Provencal troubadours 800 or so years ago. The rhyming was tight and so lyrical that it virtually produced it's own music when spoken. I don't think the first two stanzas are quite in the same league. I'd love to see you fatten them up. I can see the kernels of imagery there, but I don't feel the power of the water current or the weight of ages.
May 28, 2004
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Wow... I really don't know what to say... but wow. I am very impressed.
Lerart
May 28, 2004
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Amazing
Amazing emotion. Very VERY well written. I envy your ability to manipulate words. Great job. I'm going to go check out some more of your writings now. Loved it.
the atlantic
May 28, 2004
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wow this piece is dripping with emotion. i really like the topic..society is a wonderful thing to address and write about. this piece really made me think....twas very well done.

Jay
Fraon
May 28, 2004
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Very well written and I can imagine just what it looks like the picture at the top is weird but it's a beautiful poem great job.

~~Dios~~
S A Adelmann
May 28, 2004
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Nicely done. I think that some regions of the world have witnessed a disproportionate amount of bloodshed. The cradle of civilisation needs peace. Thought provoking work.

Scott
ScarletStorm
May 28, 2004
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beautiful!!! sheer brilliance... sombre, strong, deep, meaningful- just a few words to begin to describe this excellent poem... i would applaud you again.. yet i wudnt want ur ego to be too swollen- u already got THIRTY!! Bloomin' norman!! u must have got ur promotoion points back alright from this lil gem!! mind u, i spose u deserve it..
xxx
Scarlet
Simple-Minded
May 28, 2004
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You have a great many applauses, and so I decided to read it a few times to make sure that it was worth another; It definitely is. I think "On Tigris shores again." ought to read, "On Tigris' shores again." though I could be wrong. This a fantastic poem, and good luck with the AP idol competition!
shastadaisey123
May 28, 2004
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beautiful
beautiful..deserves all the applause...my favorite part........"Today we see
This hardened vein
And skies reflect the pain,
As soldiers fight
And poets write
On Tigris shores again." thank you for sharing...freda
Flaming Sky
May 28, 2004
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I felt this could have been further expanded upon-- I'm not sure what way, but it felt very short, for a river with such a broad and lengthy history. Your imagery, however, is quite beautiful, and I love the words you've chosen. Keep on writing.

- sky.
queenie
May 28, 2004
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eloquent
the rhyme pattern is exquisite.the words are it is a poet's delight.a masterpiece.a visionary delight for your words brought it to eye's view.this form,is it a traditional one or is it one you created.this is simply wonderful.
Godwin
May 28, 2004
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You portray vividly
the activities around a body of water with carefully chosen words.The rhyme scheme plays some subtle music.Thought-provoking I must say.You did a grand job here.
Hobbit Warrior
May 28, 2004
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That was intense writing. And it makes sense, the river are so old, have seen so much. And yes, I think we all wonder whether the bloodshed will ever end, or at least slow down a bit. Who knows?
Nice job, I give you applause,
Amanda
Aerona
May 28, 2004
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Awesome poem, writen very well, I love the word usage and just the whole strength they give to the poem. I also love the picture you put up with it, really enhances it. Very awesome poem!
HopesAreLies
May 28, 2004
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wow this is amazing that is somthing i am not suprised about though because everything that i have read that you have written is just utterly amazing this is a great poem and it is full of imagery that is probablly why i like your writings so much ......

"Crimson stained
In depth
We've wept
And knelt upon its shores.

Warrior poets
From ages lost
Have carved it's shores in rhyme,
As bloody hand
In burning sand
Melted into time."

That is my favorite part of this magnificant work of art that you have written great job ~~~HopesAreLies/Alex~~~
wattle
May 28, 2004
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wow nice/beautiful poem - very topical - thankyou for sharing
itsjenn xo
May 27, 2004
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Beautiful poem! Very well said, so touching. I like the picture, it added a certain effect. It's sad to think of how much bloodshed has occured right in one region.
wide-eyed
May 27, 2004
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a
wow this is putiful i like it alot and its flow is excellent i love it good job and keap it up pen ta paper mannnnnnn

-nick
SuchPrettyWords
May 27, 2004
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i have to go on in unexpression of what i felt in this....because i have no words that can describe it....
FlyingDaggers
May 27, 2004
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WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW !!!!!!!!!!!
Blue moon
May 27, 2004
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Hi there,
I feel that this was a great write, very interesting and ver beautiful. I found it rather touching. Well done and thanks for sharing. I feel that this was very well thought out. I hope that you continue tow rite and continue to share.

All the best to you and yours

Blue moon
BonnieQ
May 27, 2004
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As Eddy said, the end will come when earth's days are over: which is not too long from now, for all signs point to Christ's quick return to take up His own and "escort them to the sure safe haven of heaven."

This is an astoundingly good write with excellent flow, rhythm, rhyme, imagery and intensity: all of which are required of a very talented writer. You should seek out a poetry publisher with a collection of your works.

You have a God-given talent: use it well, use it wisely.

Love and hugs, BonnieQ
Associate Editor
Waltsan Publishing
purpleskies
May 27, 2004
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very very beautiful piece and touching as well, centuries of pain and experience throb between these words....wonderful work...
izeofpain
May 27, 2004
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Good job. The picture you posted along with the poem was wonderful!
MaybeOkay
May 27, 2004
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Hooray! Very nicely written and yay! Thanks for writing!
May 27, 2004
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Outstanding
This is a good poem about the conflict and I am so glad you included the age-old problem of war in this region. People forget the crusades but those in Iraq do not. It is the same old scenero of the west trying to conquor the east in the name of religion and of course the new religion of oil.
Just4u
May 27, 2004
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ON SILENT EARS

Ten thousand years the words poured out
by people filled with love
But anger filled the commonplace
for they had no need for doves

A need to fill the coffers full
so armies sent, to find the gold
Blood filled the streets, the seas turn red
As life's story did unfold

Bathed in weath they stood on perch
Dictating their decrees
While in the streets, the beggars begged
for they had no bread or seed

But too wrapped up, the top heard not
or maybe didn't care
And so the killing didn't stop
or the greed, that's everywhere

Eddy
5/27/040

A good peice bro. I fear the end of it will come when the
end of us does...
The Supreme Mink
May 27, 2004
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Fantastic poem, you captured the age of this great river, the seed of great civilisations, you greatly deserved the applauses handed. Cheers
polycarp
May 27, 2004
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This is a painful experience..... it's sad enough that Nations now rise against nations.
LuminousKiss
May 27, 2004
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Woooot! This was just an awesome poem . . . flowed nicely, and kept your attention, always making you think. You can tell there's more behind the words calling you, drawing you in, making you read think. I liked it though, that sense of captivation only makes this work of art even better. Wondrous work, my friend, keep it up and never stop writing. God Bless you and your gift.

~~~Shanna~~~
DoubleD
May 27, 2004
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Magnificent
WOW! That is the only thing I could think when I was reading your poem! Excellent job! That picture was just... wow! I almost thought your poem wouldn't live up to the picture, but I was wrong. You pulled through and etched that picture into my mind... I can't wait to read more from you!!!

Paige
RollingStone
May 27, 2004
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outstanding poem, mike! the language is elegant, classically poetic, and the form and rhyme and flow is like... well, the tigris river. This is image rich and makes the scene come to life. excellent writing!
haley27
May 27, 2004
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This is beautiful. Where are the Tigris Shores located in the Middle East?Haley27
Ava Noire
May 26, 2004
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Great topic, one not encountered so often in poetry. If only we had the compassion to listen to what it had to tell us... perhaps our ancestors might not have made such mistakes.
soulfire
May 26, 2004
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it was ok. the subject of war adn death and blood is getting slightly tired but you still managed to capture beauty even through teh death and mediocre monotony of the subject
wastedbreath
May 26, 2004
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Nice work. I enjoyed your poem. It had a great flow and expression in it.
marianacolinchu
May 26, 2004
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this is very amazing poem, I love warrior poets, the tails of the ones who battle and weap in defeats or joys, see you later .
RalphPhillips
May 26, 2004
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Very nice. The Tigris is part of the cradle of civilation, and has seem much of the drama of human history, including the sad events going on in the region now. Thanks for acknowleging that in this poem. I like the picture, too.
May 26, 2004
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i can see and feel what is attempted successfully in this poem, but i am in no way transported to the place or the scene.. seems to me more of a humanistic commentary than a descriptive poem....though i must say the visual at the top is tits.
May 26, 2004
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great!
This is too much! I find your expression very touching, very compelling for my emotions. The poem- based on the old Tigris- has the feel of a legend to it. The contrast reflected in the verses "As soldiers fight/And writers write" deeply reflects the irony of the situation. Very Very well written, I must say.
Edited on May 26, 9:41 because 'typo'.
moonlitmirror
May 26, 2004
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I like this-it's unique and original. I've never read a poem about this before and it's always nice to find something different. I liked the flow and rhyme, everything seemed to fit together really well. Great peice, thanks for sharing

~blessings~

~rora
MagicLady
May 26, 2004
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You did a great job on this.....something that is not often written about. You described a lot of emotion, and terrific imagary. Good luck in the contest...this is a wonderful write. Cheryl
azure85
May 26, 2004
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Very nice poem about an ancient entity that hundreds of conquerors viewed-an undefeatable river with such sights around it. Nice description of the emotions of this waterway.
Charmkin
May 26, 2004
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What an incredibly poignant write... it's a bit brief, yet you're still able to capture so much depth and emotion in these few words. I agree with others who have complimented you on this write's meter... it flows so well, perhaps like the Tigris!? Anyway, I hope to read more of your writes soon. Take care.
Edited on May 26, 5:17 because 'typo'.
May 26, 2004
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this is great. Keep up the good work.
shamik
May 26, 2004
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I don't know what to say. It was splendid. The simplicity was it's crown but the pictures that flashed in front of my eyes as I read this were so very vivid. A million years fitted in such few words. Great.
CherryRain
May 26, 2004
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Kinda dramatic and sad. Very thought provoking. I'm one of those who have felt helpless in the wake of the varying chain of tragedies. To be honest, that is the reason I try to give it as little thought as possible. But with Memorial Day around the corner and after allowing your work to splash my conscience with reality, memories of the information feed to me by the news, internet and even the newspaper that I work for, floods through my brain. I find myself wondering how much pain that land has seen and how much more will be inflicted. And many still wonder, 'who's war is it, anyway?'

... If that all makes sense.

Oh yeah... did I say great write? And awesome photo too!
Edited on May 26, 1:31 because ''.
Blue moon
May 26, 2004
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Hi there,
I feel that this was a great write, it was beautifully written with quite a lot of imagery and description. I loved you rhythm and meter. Well done and thanks for sharing this excellent piece. All the best to you and yours

Blue moon
Bonzo
May 26, 2004
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Ver nice poem, like the ending, it reminds me of something that I cant put my finger on right now. I think it has a haunting quality to it.
MirandaNicole
May 26, 2004
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Wonderful write
Amazing...I love every word of this one. It's beautifully written, and it makes me wonder, as well. Thanks for sharing. Keep it up. I enjoyed reading this.

~Miranda
ValkyriesChosen
May 26, 2004
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Magnificent
I agree with dottedmyeyes. I like the symbolism and am tired of opinions. If I read another blame america first poem I think I'll puke. This was beautiful and what is so wonderful about it, is that no matter which side of the war you are on, we can all agree that the Tigris is tainted with blood. Some righteous, some not, but both joined in the Mighty Tigris. It's almost symbolic of how good and evil shall someday both find death together. Excellent piece. VC
-Reality-
May 25, 2004
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Wow. This is amazing. So many feelings in here, and such a great meaning. This is, wonderful! Beautifulwrite Zez!

Kami
Martooni
May 25, 2004
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Though it has a dark "Hallmark card" feel to it, you've put forward a powerful message (you did ask for a crit). The juxtaposition of soldiers and poets is excellent, as well as the reference to the Tigris as a "hardened vein".
NurseChilly
May 25, 2004
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good piece Mike.. helluva lot of emotions packed in here.. on many levels.. I know how deeply you feel this..
Well penned my friend and good luck
Maybe you could read my entry too
~GILL~xxxx
ArtFullyMe
May 25, 2004
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This is very good. It has a definite meter and rhythm to it and the descriptions are clear. It may not seem to be outwardly extremly ..descriptive but it paints a picture beyond the words a very complex and definite one.. Good Luck

~~whims
cinnamon-spider
May 25, 2004
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Applauded
This is an excellent poem, and, upon reading it again, I think it has very good use of rhyme. However, when I read it the first time, I was about to comment and say that the rhythm didn't really work with the rhyme scheme. Maybe it could be clafified slightly; Im not sure what I mean, or if it can be done, so dont take this very seriously. I missed the 'rhyme/time' rhyme (eek) the first time, I think it may be because i grouped the third line of the stanza(subconciously) with the other two non-rhyming lines, and then the other three together. But it would spoil the rhythm to get rid of one of them. Something that would take a lot of effort for a little gain; Ignore me
theprodigalsister
May 25, 2004
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Simply beautiful.
dottedmyeyes
May 25, 2004
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this poem was depressingly beautiful, if that makes sense. i liked it because it gave you imagery, information, emotion, but not necessarily an opinion. and if anyone else is as tired as i am about this war, theyre not in the mood for another opinion anymore. thanks for sharing this beautiful piece. it was neautral but effective.
alyssa
Balldinger
May 25, 2004
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Excellent consumation of thought. Bringing both the soldier and poet together in a part of the world that has given birth to each - eternally. Great job!
Lillandra
May 25, 2004
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As usual with your poems, I read first, look at picture second(then read again). I always get two different meanings from each read...which is great because the words can span so many emotions. That picture is kind of unsettling in an eerie way.
madchillie
May 25, 2004
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This has to be one of my favourite poems I have read here. The idea of basing it on the river, and portraying the hurt that it has seen throughout time, especially now, is perfect and beautifully constructed. The photo goes really well and you have created a chillingly true piece. I don't know what else to say really, expect I really enjoyed it!

Sarina
SEA angel
May 25, 2004
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EXCELLENT
This poem isn't long yet speaks of the long span of time of generations that seem to pass the baton of war from one warrior to the next. Meanwhile poets gather up their words that lie scattered on the battle ground in want of peace to be found when, finally, the Poets' words are gathered up and heard.

Note: Background is quite dramatic and powerful of the years of bloodshed when powers collide in quest of power only to destroy or be destroyed.
Edited on May 25, 12:27 because ''.
Nicolisis
May 25, 2004
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Work of Art
I loved this poem - it spoke to me (no really it did! ) I loved the imagery, I also saw the comparisons to the war in Iraq. Work of Art, Luv Niky xx
satindoll
May 25, 2004
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Beautiful
I love this! Especially the lines:
Warrior poets
From ages lost
Have carved it's shores in rhyme,
As bloody hand
In burning sand
Melted into time.

So sad, and so beautful. Nice.
Jenny
Fading Faith
May 25, 2004
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I love your word choice and imagery! Nicely done.

~Faith
Faile
May 25, 2004
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amazing!
wow. wonderful use of rhyme and imagery. i usually don't enjoy rhyming poems because they seem to metered and strict to be very deep, but this one caught my attention and held it with quite eloquent language. kudos! the only thing i would suggest is working on the first two stanzas to keep they meter even. the last two stanzas are amazing and the first two kinda threw me off. maybe cutting the first two down a bit and molding them into one with 6 lines would work. the second stanza would be easy to make into three lines but i'm not so sure about the first. well, that's bout all, except for the fact that i appreciate the use of spell check, or simply correct spelling to begin with because misspelled words are a pet peev of mine. thanx again for the great read and best of luck in the AllPoetry Idol contest!
God bless!
~Faile~
F Etc
May 25, 2004
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I know nothing about anything but it's a good poem. i didn't notice the rhyme and meter haha i better go read it again
ok i see it.

good luck uncle zez, i hope you know you're up against your woman and your favourite niece and of course my mother gillian if you get through with this which you undoubtedly will and i dont get through with mine which i undoubtedly wont, I'll cry and get suzi to bite you.

Jadey xXxXx
May 25, 2004
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I'll keep writing, and keep venting and keep ..well yeah. I see the reference to Iraq, but this reads more personal to me.