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Broken Hallelujah

In the midst
of a soft summer’s night.
Breeze lifting
the scents of
fresh sheets
and sprinkler-wet
cut grass.
And the crickets
conduct their lonely
lullabies,
and Jeff is
Letting me down gently
With his “Hallelujah, Hallelujah”s.

Here I am,
trapped in free air.
Refusing to set you free
while this silver night
only wants me to dance.

Author notes

Jeff Buckley has been with me through some pretty tough times in my life, this one being amongst them.  He and his music are my muse and inspiration.

Basically, this poem is about one night when I was depressed after the loss of my first real love, and I went outside to sit in the grass and think.  It was just me, my headphones playing my Jeff softly, and nature, and it was one of the most amazing experiences in my life.  That night, I saw not one, but two shooting stars, and I felt like the night was just clear and beautiful and only for me.  I don't think I ever felt so one with nature as I did that night.
Written May 20th, 2004

A contest entry

What did you think

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments

1 - 8 of 8
  • EapRaven08
    December 5, 2005
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    neat

    I could really connect to this piece it was some piece.


  • Lo Justin
    February 19, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Very nice. I could almost see you, bathing on the roof. Congrats on the troph.
    Peace,
    Lo


  • satuRn
    May 28, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    wow, that was realy beautiful! congrats on the bronze- your piece is very deserving! well well done!! i love the flow and word choice- your imagery and emotion is very plain. well done!


  • roxychic10788
    May 27, 2004
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    very realistic poem...i like it a lot! it was beatiful


  • Ava Noire silver member
    May 26, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    Lovely, realistic scene. Gave me some warm flashbacks of my teenage years and a good friend I used to know. The second, final stanza was my favorite. Something magic there.

  • forevermore
    May 25, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    Thanks so much for the trophy! I feel special.

  • Magdalena
    May 24, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    I was able to connect with this this is what i've been looking for a poem of one and nature and night and just relaxing it makes me feel good
    chao


  • May 23, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    this is a great poem, i love it. trapped in free air is a wonderful line. yay

1 - 8 of 8