by Gregg Rowe
Empty
waiting room, last
year's subscription's, wait for
my test results -- think of lost friends;
silence
Author notes
Written May 3rd, 2004
In a list
A contest entry
- Power by neuentag.
350 points, ended June 29, 2004, 59 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 20 of 20
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One of the only poems that have made me cry. What can I say? This is the first of your poems that I have read- now intend to read more. Can't wait. The background is perfect for this poem. In a way, I think it was this image that really touched me. It really drew the poem together. Beautiful. Perfect.
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Incredible!
Very strong, very sad poem. The wallpaper fits it perfectly. And I can't imagine the feeling in such a situation... but this almost made me feel it. Nearly brought a tear to my eye. I've only read your works once or twice, never commented however. I had no idea what to say to give your words justice. You're an absolutely wonderful poet, every poem I read is just great. Very deep, so much emotion. And I don't know you as a person, but I'm sure that you're an awesome guy. I'm sorry for your struggle, but you're a strong man, and you'll be fine. Keep up your great work, LOTR, you really have been blessed with a great talent. God bless you sir.
My best regards. -Bloodrose~ -
it's a beautiful poem.good job..but it's SO sad
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Spirited: I just hope there is some room next to you..
There is always room next to me for those who wish to sit beside me and be a friend because I do not like to walk behind because I may not feel like following and I do not wish to go ahead because I may not feel like leading, so I will walk beside you and be your friend.
As soon as I finish posting my next poem I promise to read some of yours, falling behind here because I tire easily but I promise to make it to your peotry. Gregg
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Gregg what can i write about your words to give them justice ? all of us are caught in this storm we call live all lost and lonley . then we meet or feel the presence of such a human that makes us stop and think .we think about our lives and those of others and only then do we ralize there are others here to .all of these words before me make this mind turn nolonger about me but about you and others . even though we are complete strangers you will not be forgotten . i had hoped my words would imortalize me after death .i just hope there is some room next to you..
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This was great, I can see why it won...Well done! ~Jo~ xxx
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Frightening
Nothing could be more horrible than waiting to find out if you have a death sentence hanging over your head. I've had to wait myself too once and it wasn't any fun at all. This was a very powerful but scary write. The background is also very fitting for this poem. The best of luck to you in the contest. Avril
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Frightening
Nothing could be more horrible than waiting to find out if you have a death sentence hanging over your head. I've had to wait myself too once and it wasn't any fun at all. This was a very powerful but scary write. The background is also very fitting for this poem. The best of luck to you in the contest. Avril
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oh my gosh, this is exactly what i was looking for! im truly sitting back in my mind and thinking "wow". thank you so much for sharing this... it's provoking and dark and strong and...well... utterly powerful. best best best of luck with the contest and all you do!
neuentag
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How sad my dear
You brought a tear to my eye.
This is beauty, pure and simple beauty.
I applaud you
FifthDove -
Oh wow, I don't know what to say for this. Usually I have something to say, but you've left me speechless. I've missed seeing you around, it's good to have you back. Take care hun.
Vampress -
I don't really know what to say for this one.
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I actually penned it after watching "It<s My Party" for about the hundredth time and always weep silently at the end, specially the ocean scene. I can still see their spirits around me when I am down and in need, like at this particular moment in my life, I know my friends are surrounding...spiritually and alive. Thank you for reading and commenting on my owrks tonight. I will read more of yours after I finish penning the one that needs to escape. Gregg
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That last line hits hard. The picture, staggering in it's multi layered message. The focus of an outstretched hand. Amazing.
Maddie -
At first I thoght tht this was in Tanka form. Not enough syllables. Then in your comment above you said a Cinquain. Now the light dawns! I have sat with many friends while they wait in the AIDS clinic while they get their test results. Have held many hands in the process. Have wept oceans of tears after they have passed away. Thanks for having the courage and the will to write about this.
Hugs,
Willow
P.S. Thanks for the comment on Fuzzy Face. I glad to know that you best buddy Boots is now doing fabulous. -
Oh, I remember that waiting room. I remember the lump in my throat containing my fears as I contemplated all the stupid things I had done. I like this form of poetry, and this is written perfectly.
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Can I hug you, kiss you, lick you...that's the ending I was searching for all morning tabernacle, SILENCE empty waiting room!!!!! Why didn't I see it!!!!!
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NOW I see...believe it or not, I had missed the fact that it is a cinquain! I understand the form, I just think it would be better as free style or....hmmmm
Empty
cold waiting room,
filled with past subscriptions
anxiously wait for test results --
silence
something like that...I'm in no way trying to rewrite it just so you know lol.
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I like your suggestions but then it would change my form of it being a Cinquain 2-4-6-8-2, I had origninally written it another way and wasn't happy with that either, what I was trying to achieve here with the specific line and syllable count was the concept of time itself...what do you think?
Edited on May 03, 10:39 because ''. -
Honestly, I would have preferred the lines as
Empty
waiting room,
last year's subscription's,
wait for
my test results --
think of lost friends;
read TIME
That's just my own personal opinion. This is very strong in its few words (even as the lines are above)...I wanted to read this, and surfed through your author's page so I wouldn't use up your points! I'll have to add you to my favorites, as I'm really looking forward to reading more of your work. I don't want to sound fake, but I really do wish you the best of luck in everything - I cannot entirely sympathize but try to have empathy. I went through a period where I was undergoing tests every six months after an unfortunate incident (a boy I knew forced himself upon me time and time again, forcing me to perform fellatio), needless to say that forever changed my life. I am thankful that no serious health problems have arisen from it, but it's something I'll never forget. In any case, I think I'm done rambling now...
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