Something happened to me, but I forgot what it was
Regardless of regard, love, warmth, vitamins and milk.
Cigarettes and long walks through fleeting concentration
I have an idea that what I thought mattered changed.
I was brought up, and let go, I was taken there lacking
And when bathing quit, sleep folded, and answers caved.
People began to need more of what identified them
From their clothes, kisses, small talk, and sincerity.
But the day I was born Nixon lied and Elvis died
And all of the things I had a name upon vanished.
There are pictures and sweet notes still kept loosely
Among crenellated landscapes I recall out of habit.
If I keep separating and dividing these variables
Perhaps I will formulate an old way to feel new.
Author notes
Written May 1st, 2004
In a list
What did you think
Comments
1 - 21 of 21
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Horus, you have a way with words that create wonderful, deep and thoughtful images. I never quite understand the intent but it makes the poem on less personable and your works are always memorable, in fact they are often haunting. Good job.
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pretty cool...had to read it a couple of times before my feeble mind could understand it though lol! don't worry about it...i'm just a little bit um sketchy.
my fav line: "perhaps I will formulate an old way to feel new." it's oh so deep and makes me feel so...idk GREAT JOB!
love,
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To "find an old way to feel new" truly sums up your poem and ends it without questioning the meaning of the verses leading up to it. A nicely paced poem. It's always interesting to come across a piece that brings images through vocabulary that really does make you have to sit back and think in order to really take it all in.
Fear in reading your work is that the bar is set so damn high as far as looking at one's own "work." Thought provoking and tightly woven. A hard "act to follow." -
Good poem. It made no sense.
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I like it a lot, but I don't see what it has to do with my contest.
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Temporal, is the greatest thing I've ever written.
In an ocean of fish shit, that poem alone keeps
me writing, and when I say fish shit, I am the fish. -
I'm actually looking for Temporal because I love that poem and would like to applaud it, if I didn't already. See, I want to pay my contest entry fee, and I just can't bring myself to applaud just anything, stupid though that may be.
But this one is good too. Each stanza has at least one great line, which is pretty good out of two. "Crenellated" is a great word, castles on the headlands.
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Compelling
Very interesting. You're drawing me in. You write that kind of poetry that I know I have to bookmark, come back to and live with awhile to really grasp the true value of. -
this is an absoluely excellent piece...I feel old..and not very smart ...well done
freda
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See, I don't remember, but I think Elvis died the year before I was born ..and somehow I still wish I'd known him, though that has nothing to do with this poem. Hmm and loss, the thing about loss is it leaves us wanting so often ..at least it has me...and when you can't fill that void, the questions become neverending ...and I still have memories that are lost to me ..somewhere in that void..though I don't really want to remember what I lost. If that makes sense.
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Your words are so beautiful!
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Excellent.
This really is a good write, and i just cannot help but recommend Nin's "Seduction of the Minotaur", especially if you have not read it already. -
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Geez.. you was born the year Elvis died.. now I feel old.. this was a wonderful meander into the self of horus.. beautifully done sir..
~GILL~xxx -
This is great, I really admire the style you use in your writing, it all flows so fell and seems so natural and unfettered, like the images just pour out of you, and you don't even really have to create them. The ending of this one was excellent, as well as the general theme and image of it all. Great job.
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A very touching thing to say, thank you.
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ive been reading all of your poems lately, and i need to say that im a big fan of your work. ive failed to comment on all of them because it seems like i have nothing constructive to say... so, i guess im just saying thank you for sharing... and that i hope to see more works of yours.
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=(
makes me feel sad for some reason.
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crenellated...do you rock or what? -
Just exactly the shit that i have been trying to say for as long as I have been writing. Damn elusive statement, but one worth trying to find.
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nice work i really like your since so now i must leave to eat pissa pizza pizza adios amigos good bye freind pizza pizza the cat D im siamise
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9 old applause
