Bad wine stomach pain
Vitreous enamel gets
The wrath of grapes
Author notes
bring it on. No, I don't consider this my absolute best, but then, you haven't proved you are the best judge now have you? WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
PS explanation of what it means supplied on request! wahahahahahahahahahah
hums "Hanging on the telephone"
PS, don't pull punches. I'm a big boy now. (Well overweight anyway )
Written April 22nd, 2004
In a list
A contest entry
- Honest Critques In Exchange For Your Best by onerios13.
500 points, ended October 17, 2004, 78 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
-
no whining in the vineyard please
short. sweet. not whiny!
no whining in the vinyard please! -
re senryu sickness, the inspiration for this came from a contest for writing of grapes. The grapes of wrath haunted me. lol But of course, that's far to famous to use and I lacked the resources to purchase and parody it. Best? well, when you are reasonably prolific, what is your best? what you are proud of or what others love? Also do you pander to the judge or stick with what you consider best. My two main strengths ( I believe) are humour, rhyme and an irreverent way of considering the world. No, my THREE mains strengths are humour, rhyme, a reasonable vocabulary and an irreverent way of considering the world. My FOUR main strengths (sigh) lol. Thanks for the early feedback
-
LOL...okay, so I may NOT be the best judge out there, but hell, even I can appreciate such dashing humor as this piece is! lol Honestly, if this wasn't one of your best, then I'd venture forth to say that it's prolly one of the most tongue in cheek clever pieces I've come across so far at this site, lol. That last line had me snickering something fierce, lol. So yeah, if this wasn't your best, then DO give me your best then...cause this one was a fine preview of what you could REALLY do!
-
LOL. Count on you to come up with something like this. So yeah, great job with this. Had me rolling, and the picture with it is just hysterical. The wrath of grapes. lol. That was just too funny. Great write with this one.
-
oh my belly laughter so can hurt on a full stomach, glad i read this after i ate! lol, this piece is priceless!
-
Ha ha ..I love the picture that you got with the poem...How interesting..People say grapes and so many people think of the toilet bowl...lol Great Job on the poem and the bestest best luck in the contest...
Bambie -
Great title, love the poem, especially the twist in the last line. Good luck for the contest.
-
LOL!! vitreous enamel gets the wrath of grapes lmao.. that's ace
-
Very funny!
Jen
Adding your comment:
1 - 9 of 9
