I am enveloped in you
with all the inadequacies
and shortcomings of imprisonment
I'm captured, but in your embrace
I'm weightless
floating and buoyant like a fetus
I understand happiness
and when you submerge yourself into me
you take my breath away...
forever
A contest entry
- I can hardly breathe! by poetryality.
1400 points, ended November 17, 2009, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 17 of 17
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I loved the title and feel it really is the body to this poem. Interesting concept and has a very loving feel to it. Thanks for sharing this one with us, I enjoyed the read.
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Thank you...
I really appreciate that you read my attempt and left a gracious comment.
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Beautiful...
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Thanks...
The picture prompt took control of my muse...
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i like where you took your title and embraced it in the piece. i love the whole poem. i just can't decide on one line inparticular that i liked more. i guess i got to say that i loved the ending. you closed your piece very gracefully. a wonderfully written short piece with much love. continue on with the penning...lol!
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Continuing is not an option... writing is my sanity.
Thank you... Such kind words!! -
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sometimes it's my sanity too...lol. welcome!
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The simplicity here is overwhelmingly adequate. Yes! This is wonderful! You paint the image well with these words. I feel every nuance, every missed breath... Yes! Thank you for this entry and I wish you the best in the contest.
Much Love ♥
Renee
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Thanks...
It was a very interesting and inspiring prompt. Thank for your glowing words.
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Nice work
This is good work, I wish I had the same talent you display with such ease.
Do you use the same skills when chatting to the ladies?.
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Wow... thanks
Your compliment is very welcome. Thank you. As far as the ladies go, well, I'm more like Cyrano de Bergerac than Valentino.
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Oh Wow! such captivating words...and it gives such a dreamy ang drifting effect.
excellently written
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Thanks
Glad to see you come back around and then to make a comment on MY piece!?!?!? FANTABULOUS!!
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A very mature and lovely piece. Probably one of the most impressive pieces on this topic Ive seen on AP
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Thank you
I appreciate you taking time to read my write, Trixie. I'm awed by your comment, but I am also grateful. Thanks again...
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A breathtaking write! I love this style and see how much growth has taken place in your writes;a beautiful metamorphis indeed.
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Thank you...
The journey to one's personal Mecca is strenuous and at times lengthy. I am no where near mine, but I appreciate that you see change and maturation. Thank you for such a inspiring commentary.
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