Insanity Muses Upon Its Reflection

As I look to the mirror,
all I can see is a shadow of
my former self.

What I once was has become
a mere extension of
what others want me
to be.

An empty, lifeless husk.
Manipulated by puppeteers,
transforming like chrysalis to butterfly,
from real life person to painted porcelain doll.

I'm malleable, I'm never-drying clay
Shape me,
use me,
crush me,
start again,
until I'm all you ever wanted me to be.

Don't you think one day the clay will crack?
(And trust me, this clay cracks easily,
like watching Aeris die by Sephiroth's hand...
I cracked that day too.
A little part of me died, and it showed.)

Prozac? Never seen the stuff before
in my life. Ups and downs, whites and blues.
Let the Prozac interfere with that? No way!

Life's one terrifying, never ending rollercoaster
and I intend to enjoy (more like loathe) every single minute
of my up-and-down-and-round-and-round...
(Can you guess the next word? Spell it out!)

I for... I'm a massive screw up and I'm sorry.
N for... Never going to make a difference in this world.
S for... Screaming disappointment in my head.
A for... A false veneer of happiness to veil the sorrow.
N for... Not enough, never enough.
I for... Intelligence? I'll never have it.
T for... Tell me the truth for once... please...
Y for... You. The root of all this.

I-N-S-A-N-I-T-Y.

Insanity.