Have you ever walked down a street and observed a couple in love? Not just every day love, but real love? The kind of love that is everlasting NO MATTER WHAT. Where they have no fears because they will always have each other at the end of the day. The couple that every small glance is sensual, where touch is sacred between them.
Have you ever experienced such a love?
No?
Have you ever longed for such?
I do.
I long to find that special someone that only has eyes for me, and i for him. to have such a connection with that special person that no matter how much distance is physically put between us, we would still be together in spirit.
What did you think
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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The eyes are the window to the soul. You are to me on first impression from your words, a dreamy individual, imaginitive and probably now in loveLOLz Kool write!!!
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Short and Sweet.
Pay attention to capitalizing the beginnings of sentences, and capitalizing I's. To give this a quicker flow for readers I would suggest this format for you:
Have you ever walked down a street and observed a couple in love?
Not just every day love, but real love?
he kind of love that is everlasting NO MATTER WHAT.
Where they have no fears because they will always have each other at the day's end.
The couple that every small glance is sensual, where touch is sacred between them.
Have you ever experienced such a love?
No?
Have you ever longed for such?
I do.
I long to find that special someone that only has eyes for me, and I for him.
To have such a connection with that special person that no matter how much distance is physically put between us, we would still be together in spirit.
This format would be a little bit more aesthetically pleasing.
Other than basic grammatical errors, this was a short and sweet expressing of feeling, and I can relate to it. I gave it 2 applauds because I feel you could have expanded a tad bit more on this subject.
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Such truth
The truest goal for happiness. I have found myself in this situation to quite an extreme. Thus forming a connection between me and this poem. I love your use of questions to make the reader think. Make him/her ponder the answers to your questions. May you continue your great works of art.
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sounds like..
it would seem as though you look for love that is most hard to find, but possible under the wings of a soaring heart. it's not everyday i meet someone and ultimately begin to question myself on what i am and what i myself understand as it is. yet, something is but a tick away from fascination of how you can make my mind question even my own being. the words you write delve further and stretch unquestionably still further into my mind, making the fact of understanding all to well seen. it's nice to meet someone as talented and quite as well a gifted writer as yourself.
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i really liked this peace good job :-) -
i feel your pain
every one of us is looking the the one just for us but must of us will never find the some one and many have given up no matter how hard it is never give up hope get moving forward
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This is beautiful...
My heart feels your words! To be in love like that.. What a Blessing that would be for me.
Your words are so direct from the heart.
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I long to find that special someone that only has eyes for me, and i for him. to have such a connection with that special person that no matter how much distance is physically put between us, we would still be together in spirit.
I absolutely loved this stanza. Your I in the first line of it should have been capitalized but other than that I didn't see a thing wrong with this and I really enjoyed reading it.
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Thank you
Thank you so much for your nice comments, and for catching my grammer error. English is my second language, so any help in grammer is much appreitiated. ^_^
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Welcome to AllPoetry!
Beautiful.
This is the kind of love my parents have. After being together for more than 47 years, married for 40 of them. Even a massive and almost fatal illness could not seperate their love. I can only look on with admiration and hope some day I find half of what they have.
Welcome to AP. If you have any questions, feel free to IM me.
Keep expressing through writing.
Storm
Site Greeter -
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Thank you, for your kind words, and sharing your personal feelings...
May your day be filled with blessings...
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wow, this is really good. i wish my poems could be more like this, and i wish i could find a man like that too. lmao.
good job, keep it up.
xx.red.
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