The rain becomes my lover,
and this summer too long gone -
anticipation builds beneath
the cover of predawn.
I hear his soft approach - each drop
a footfall on the floor,
the thunder loud a heartbeat
I'm a puddle on the floor
his fingertips carress me
sliding smoothly on my skin
with every drop I'm drenched
yet oddly burning up within
My lover's force increases
pounding storms unleashed full-force
I surrender to my nature
and let nature take it's course
wicked wind whips fiercely
rain like waves wash over me
The very ground I stand on
shudders as my lover screams
out thunder roars and lightning
flashes rain now forming streams
and I, illuminated
sleeping soundly
in my dreams
pppffftt
Author notes
A contest entry
- Sensuality In Rhyme by Frodofan.
575 points, ended November 23, 6 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
honest critiques opinions PLEASE
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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This poem is hot. And not just because it's steamy and sensual but also because it has no punctuation and even still it is very easy to read because the flow is perfect!!!!
I thoroughly enjoyed this write! Great job. Hope your day is good so far!
Sincerely,
Sarah
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Why thank you, my day is going well so far. I hope the same for you!
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Reminds me a little of this one by me "Wanton Lullaby", http://allpoetry.com/poem/5357551
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I love all things rain, so this appeals. I always thought rain the most sensual of all of nature and you have proven that true in this poem, too. Beautiful and just a little wicked.
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Hot Hot Hot.
If lust like this comes oft in dreams
Strong arms, sweat soaked with passion screams
Limbs tangled, straining in your head
Good God! I'd never leave my bed
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Pushing the envelope, but I like the use of nature to illustrate the passion. pppffftt?
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as my lover screams
out thunder roars and lightning - allridy then
What a way to fall asleep. A sensual nature poem for sure.
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Very seductive..truly.You have a way of inviting the reader into your inner emotions, and not allowing then to leave untill you are done with them..This is a sign of a good poet..You seem to get it..congrats
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pppfftt
Such a shame when such salacious acts end in a pppfftt. lol but just the divine thoughts alone can arouse one to greater heights. And then perhaps like magic...pppfftt your lover may appear. Well penned as always.
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kinda like making hay while the sunshines....
I like this though.....but I'm not telling why....
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wow, thats a powerful poem. I just wish I had dreams like that, from the male pespective of course ha ha...It flowed so well just floating along...great...
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Pro vita sua
applause duly added
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Excellent observation for the physician to heal ... for despite
"pounding storms unleashed full-force"
I surrender to my nature and let nature take it's course
... sage advice to take to heart
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yeah..rain puts me to sleep too. . =))
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