the wind bites my bare arms and
my shivers resound in thirty-thousand.
but they don’t have fire-water or pride
or even a roof.
i have that, mostly, but the only thing
i notice are the oil stains on the wall
and that maybe tomorrow i’ll have
eggs for breakfast.
Author notes
forty-nine words
A contest entry
- anything by Virgoan.
1000 points, ended November 24, 30 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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wow
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The waiting and wanting is very obvious here - i like it because it is intrinsic.
The things the we hold and wish for as time passes is not really something that we like to begin with. There are more and the mind knows that it is being pushed further.
I'll say that this is brilliant because it is brilliant.
Thanks and regards,
Hensley
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I really like this prose. The last three lines bring along a finality to the poem. It seems like you're going to live a boring life in the end, even though you probably resent it. Well written. =)
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thanks for your comment, but it's not about me.
i wrote from the perspective of a person i know, one who doesn't live his life to the fullest.
and yes, he will resent it.
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Whoa!!!!! I really liked this...the title hooked me in, but your words are amazing. The last line was what really got me, it was genius...That through that it didnt matter 'cus you were having eggs for breakfast.
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